You and this guy have been texting for a month. You are completely smitten, and find yourself daydreaming about him instead of working. When his messages pop up on your phone, you get a huge smile on your face, dying to see what he has to say. But what to do when the guy you like doesn’t text back?
Maybe you’ve gone on a couple of fun dates, but nothing too serious has been discussed between the two of you. He’s very funny and enjoys joking with you until your stomach aches from laughter, and you both also have a love for Mexican food on the weekends.
By Thursday, your spicy cravings are really starting to kick-in. Did someone say mango margaritas? So you text him to see what he’s up to. But this Friday he doesn’t make plans with you to hit up your favorite taco joint.
You wonder about what he’s up to and why he isn’t making plans … but you keep it chill and don’t say anything.
After all, you have your own life! Right?!
Finally, he mentions something about hanging with his boys and he would try to meet up over the weekend but doesn’t confirm any plans.
Monday morning rolls around and you still haven’t heard from him. Then at ten in the morning, you receive a text message saying, ”Morning. How was your weekend?” You want to respond, but at the same time, you’re annoyed and completely flustered because he was MIA all weekend.
So you debate, do you bring up that he ignored you all weekend? Or do you play it cool like you don’t care?
This happens to our friends and clients ALL the time, so we’ve come up with a set of five CRUCIAL rules to help you play it cool, but also find out what’s up. Here’s how to text a guy when you need him to take you seriously.
1. Make him wait a bit!
You probably want to respond to his message right away, but WAIT!
You haven’t heard from him all weekend, so he doesn’t deserve your immediate attention. Stop and think about what you want to really say versus what you should say.
Impulsive messaging tends to come out like fast food, as opposed to replying with a well marinated, savory thought that will keep him coming back for more.
It’s your job to set the tone of the relationship if you want to keep the connection sizzling. Establishing boundaries in the beginning stages creates a recipe for him to follow for future interactions.
Remember — you show others how you want and deserve to be treated by how you communicate.
When you haven’t heard from him all weekend, wait a good amount of time before you respond to his Monday morning text.
A sufficient time would be 1-3 hours because you need to show him you have your own life too. Responding to him when you are free from your work duties or hobbies shows you aren’t available at his beckon call.
You’re not his ego-feeder.
2. Keep calm and cool.
Don’t respond to a text message when you are angry, upset or completely distraught over his behavior.
Aggressive, fiery text messages often lead to a zero response rate.
They are overwhelming for men to read and may lead to him grabbing the fire extinguisher. This is can damage the connection instantly, cutting off all communication.
You will want to make sure you are calm and cool like a mango margarita before responding.