Are you heartbroken and dealing with the pain of betrayal? Well, did you know there are positive effects of heartbreak? Learn why heart breaks are necessary for self-discovery and growth!
When love breaks our heart it gives you the worst kind of pain. It is natural to feel stabbing pain when we find something for which we had gambled everything was a bet that we could have never won.
“Sometimes the bad things that happen in our lives put us directly on the path to the best things that will ever happen to us.” ~ curiano.com
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We had placed all our hopes in it, yet it was something that was never meant to fulfill them.
And when we see our hearts shattered into millions of pieces, we can’t help but wonder what went so immensely wrong.
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It’s human nature to make mistakes and we can go wrong in love too.
That’s simply because we are continuously evolving. Every experience in our lives makes us better judge of people and situations. We make wrong choices from our need to learn from the bad experiences that follow from such choices.
We need these lessons to make the ultimate right decisions.
When life goes easy, it offers no learning experiences. The daily life where everything is right has nothing to teach us. We learn the true lessons of life when we make mistakes and when these mistakes fill us with regret we start introspecting.
However, if you are one of those who have not been able to know who they are, yet, or how they want to give and receive love, making wrong choices can hardly be called a mistake.
But, no matter how naïve we have been, sometimes we encounter such love that we want to go back in time and just undo it. We don’t want it to be a part of our history because we don’t want to remember the hurt, the grief, the pain it gave us.
We can’t change how it was with what we had wanted it to be. We have to accept the fact that we needed this love to experience heart break.
Speaking the truth, the bitter experience we had was nothing but the awakening that our souls needed. It only pushed us closer to the real love which is meant just for us.
Heartbreaks are necessary, otherwise, it wouldn’t reveal to us which way we adopt for recovery.
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The most common mistake we make is a relationship that should have been over as soon as it started or we should have parted ways long before we actually did. We should have quit much before the entire thing fell apart.
We stuck to it not because it would have eventually turned out to be the love we had always wanted it to be, but, to receive our share of truth that taught us what love actually is.
Staying in a relationship is our choice. We can continue to be in a relationship that asks us to compromise constantly with everything we believe in and everything we want in a relationship. But, even if we make these compromises in every relationship we have, never do they turn out to be what we want them to be.
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It’s because they have to be that way.
As with all mistakes, the end result of wrong decisions is always bitter and often catastrophic. They are meant to make us question ourselves and whatever notions we had about love.
Unless we are shaken to the core, we don’t open our eyes to reality or question ourselves what is it after all that led to such a disaster? To understand the truth, we have to take a dive into our inner selves and be strong enough to listen and accept what our heart knows already.
This is the process of healing that helps us realize this is not the end. We had tried to love someone. Even though it failed, there’s nothing we have lost. We can walk ahead with our dignity and faith intact because the best thing is yet to happen.
We haven’t met the love of our life. And when we meet that love, we will be too happy that we made those mistakes in the past.
There won’t be extreme highs and lows, there won’t be daily compromises, there won’t be constant battle to make things work. Unfulfilled needs and hopelessness won’t have any place in this love. It would be a true eye-opener to the fact where our previous relationships failed.
All the events in the past have only worked to lead us to this person who has been created only for us. Somehow through the imperfections of life, things end up being perfect for us.
The terrible mistakes we make are only meant to show us how it is when we do terribly right things.
Why we have to go through so much to get what is ours? The truth is, we need to get ready for true love. It doesn’t come easy. All our lives we had lived in falsehood. We had a certain picture about love, about the person we should love and even denied what we are and desperately fought to be something else. All our decisions were guided by everything which wasn’t right for us.
In such a state of mind, we wouldn’t have been able to see the truth— the reality of what was right for us. Those mistakes and their bitter consequences forced us to see the truth and gave us the strength to embrace our authentic self. We developed the ability to believe we are worthy of having the best, the things that we truly deserve.
The love that is meant just for us would be very different from anything we have seen or felt before.
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It may come like a cool puff of breeze or as something that burns. It can come with all the warmth of friendship or it can just wreak havoc. But, because those mistakes of the past have changed us, we will have a new way of approaching love.
Now, we want a love that brings peace, calm, and balance in our lives. We are able to recognize the energy that this new found relationship induces in our lives, and ignore the superficial. We are able to feel the genuine satisfaction about this deep new connection.
The fact that this person is able to bring out the best in us, determines if it is indeed that once-in-a-lifetime kind of love. It inspires us, make us do better and be better, yet it is around us without the battles, the challenges, the fears, the anxieties that had been the part of our previous love experience.
Only a love so great can make us feel this way.
And with this realization, we know our “great mistake” was actually the guiding light that we needed to find the way to the love of our life. In short, heartbreaks are necessary for self-discovery.
To understand the psychology of heartbreak, watch this interesting video:
Copyright @The Minds Journal
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