7 Ways Your Heartbreak Makes You Wiser

 March 08, 2019


 3) You learn to create boundaries

Heartbreak teaches you that one cannot fill from an empty cup. You learn to prioritize your needs, before you become a savior for others. A relationship matures beyond years when you let it breathe and bloom at its own pace. Often times due to a vague sense of our own boundaries we suffocate the relationship.

It teaches you to focus on individual independence and self-reliance. As you spend more time with yourself, trying to overcome the pain inflicted by heartbreak, you realize your worth and value which fosters self-acceptance. Most importantly you learn to love and rediscover the beauty within yourself.

The biggest lesson that you learn from heartbreak is that healthy relationships are built on healthy boundaries and poor boundaries give the other person the license to inadvertently manipulate you and take you for granted. You also learn to maintain individual identities and preferences in future relationships to come. Khalil Gibran in his book, ‘The prophet’ had expressed it aptly “Let there be spaces in your togetherness, and let the winds of the heavens dance between you.”

Everyone has a heartbreak that changed them.


 4) You learn that heartbreak is not the end of the world

Many people tend to engage in self-doubt followed by a break up. “Why me?”, “Was I not worth it?”, “I will never be able to get over this break up.” “I deserve this.” are a few things you tell yourself that reflect how it has affected your self-esteem.

Heartbreaks give you a perfect opportunity to reassess your life, your strengths and weaknesses, your dreams, your goals, your priorities and give you the strength to start afresh. While venturing for productive catharsis you often explore your creative sides. Spending time with oneself, exploring your potentials, starting new projects, cultivating new ideas, ultimately lead you to become the highest versions of yourself. What is a better motivation than heartbreak?

You also learn that your relationship is a part of your life and even though heartbreaks are pretty nasty, they don’t mean the end of the world for you. We get lost in love. And heartbreak helps us find ourselves.


5) It teaches you empathy

Once you start working on healing yourself from the pain of a break up, you try to rationally conceptualize what might have gone wrong in the relationship. This helps you to learn to consider the other person’s perspective instead of having an unhealthy focus on the self. The reason pain and suffering makes one wiser is because they teach us to be generous with others.

Once you have faced a loss, crisis or a tragic incident, you know how it feels and you can empathize with someone else going through a similar situation and inspire them to believe in themselves in times of hardship.

This makes you wiser, humble, compassionate and brave.


 6) You learn that it is better to be alone than being with the wrong person

When two people are interconnected with one another, their lives are bound in several intimate ways. They might have shared the same physical space and have created lasting memories together that make it difficult for one to instantly accept the other person’s absence. This is when we feel that the loneliness will engulf us and hold us back from moving on.

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