The True Meaning Of Unconditional Love: How To Love Unconditionally

 / 

, ,
What is Unconditional Love

We all want true love in our lives, but but do we really know what is love is? While the concept of love varies, the meaning of unconditional love goes way deeper than we may think. Here’s what is unconditional love and how it is different from conditional love.

Unconditional love is so vastly different from the love we are used to receiving that most of us don’t really know what it is. In fact, most “love” these days isn’t actually true love, but instead differing forms of infatuation, lust, affinity, affection, codependency, or egotistical neediness.

The reality is that true love is rare and immensely precious. The moment you experience true unconditional love is the moment you feel completely seen, understood, forgiven, accepted, and loved just as you are.

This feeling is the most embracing and liberating sensation you will ever experience. Indeed, unconditional love is the most healing force in the universe. Yet unfortunately, we are so starved from experiencing it regularly in our daily lives that we become emotionally and spiritually ill.

One of the saddest sights you will ever see is a being who has been completely deprived of unconditional love – and we have all experienced it at some point. But you don’t need to stay malnourished any longer. As we’ll explore, unconditional love is open for you to access in any moment, no matter where you are, or what you’re doing.

What is Unconditional Love?

“Unconditional love is not so much about how we receive and endure each other, as it is about the deep vow to never, under any condition, stop bringing the flawed truth of who we are to each other.”
Mark Nepo

Unconditional love essentially means loving someone or something without any conditions. In other words, no matter what another person says, does, feels, thinks, or believes in, we still love them unconditionally.

What is Unconditional Love?
How To Love Unconditionally: Practice Unconditional Love

Unconditional love can also be applied to other beings such as animals and even emotions and thoughts. But perhaps most importantly, unconditional love can be applied directly to ourselves in the form of self-love. The more we are able to love ourselves unconditionally, the more we are equipped to love others in the same way.

This principle echoes the famous words of Jesus, “Love your neighbor as yourself” and other enlightened masters such as Lao Tzu who said, “When you accept yourself, the whole world accepts you.”

Do You Want To Love or To Be Loved Unconditionally?

Read: 8 Signs That Prove You Have Finally Found True Love

What is Conditional Love?

Conditional love is the complete opposite of unconditional love. In fact, conditional love isn’t really “love” in the truest sense of the word, because it comes from the ego, not from the heart.

Unlike unconditional love which is given freely, conditional love has to be “earned.” When this false form of love is earned, only then is affection, respect, and kindness given.

While unconditional love is limitless and boundless, conditional love is restricted and limited. While unconditional love doesn’t need anything from the other, conditional love is given only when something is received.

The equation looks like this: I will love you only if ………. (you do this, say that, provide this, make me feel this way).

Conditional love is inherently selfish and ego-centered. Conditional love only lasts so long as certain unspoken rules are maintained or met. Some of the most common unspoken rules that underpin conditional love include:

  • I will love you only if you make me feel good about myself.
  • I will love you only if you maintain your attractive looks.
  • I will love you only if you are successful and popular.
  • I will love you only if you have a good career.
  • I will love you only if you do what I say.
  • I will love you only if you believe what I believe.
  • I will love you only if you keep supporting my bad habits.
  • I will love you only if you keep giving me money.
  • I will love you only if you are great in bed.
  • I will love you only if I have control over you.
  • I will love you only if I approve of your life decisions.
  • I will love you only if you behave properly.
  • I will love you only if you sacrifice something for me.
  • I will love you only if you abandon your dreams.
  • I will love you only if you love me.

Can you see how conditional love is a recipe for failure and absolute misery? And yes, relationships with your partner, children, family, friends, and parents can all be underpinned by conditional love.

So many of us have experienced these kinds of shallow relationships. Let’s face it, at some point in our lives (maybe even right now), we’ve dished out conditional love to other people too.

Conditional Love vs Unconditional Love: Which One Do We Need?

Unconditional love is at the very heart of what we are searching for as human beings. Studies have shown that without love and affection, infants either develop severe cognitive and psychological dysfunction or die.

Not only is unconditional love necessary for our physical, emotional, and psychological health, but it is vital for our spiritual well-being as well. Without knowing how to access the deep wellsprings of love within us, we settle for tainted forms of affection and egotistical gratification.

The sad thing is that most people aren’t even aware that they carry a source of unconditional love within themselves. We tend to believe that love is always found in the external world, in some person, animal, place, or state of being.

True Love Is Rare: Embrace It

It is imperative that we learn how to access unconditional love, because, without it, we wither away. Like plants that don’t receive sunlight, we become sickly, starved, and even desperate. This desperation can lead us to enter relationships that directly harm us, sacrificing our dreams for others, and self-sabotaging our happiness for approval.

Unconditional love is the only thing in the entire universe that can truly help us to experience the joy, freedom, acceptance, and peace we are so longing for.

Read: The Secret Key To Finding True Love

How to Experience Unconditional Love

Unconditional love doesn’t have to be earned or proven. It is timeless and endless. If you want to learn how to experience unconditional love (as much as is possible for humans), you have to be willing to rewire your conditioned habits.

The True Meaning Of Unconditional Love: How To Love Unconditionally

Here are some powerful ways to practice experiencing unconditional love towards yourself, and others:

1. Whenever you experience an emotion you dislike, embrace it, don’t push it away

We are taught to avoid and suppress “negative” emotions at all costs since childhood. Yet hiding these emotions only causes them to build in the Shadow Self. Practice accepting the way you feel instead of fighting to stop the emotion or artificially forcing yourself to be happy. Honor your emotions for what they are and the messages they bring.

2. Practice mindfulness and connect to your body

How is your body feeling? Are you feeling sore, tired, stiff, tense, or heavy in any areas? Practice mindfully observing these sensations without judgment. Breathe deeply and allow yourself to relax as you do this. By witnessing your body, and allowing anything that you feel, you will access deeper levels of inner peace.

3. Embrace your negative thoughts and habits

Remember, it is normal to struggle with negative thoughts and habits. The important thing to remember is that these thoughts and habits do not define you – you entertain them, but you don’t have to identify with them. Embrace your tendency to be negative, even self-hating. Even self-loathing is an opportunity to forgive and practice unconditional self-love.

4. Ask yourself, “Am I putting conditions on this relationship?”

Be honest. Does someone else’s behavior or beliefs stop you from loving them? It’s OK to feel anger and sadness towards another person, but withholding your love is a whole different story. What can you do to open your heart toward a person or group of people in your life?

5. Give something to someone without wanting anything in return

You can try this little practice every day. For example, you could give a compliment, do a favor for someone, let someone go in front of you in the queue, or any other form of help that will brighten another’s day.

6. Become conscious of triggers that cause you to shut off

Triggers are wounds within us that have not yet healed. When poked, triggers cause us to react with anger, self-isolation, and even hatred. By paying attention to what “pushes your buttons” you will develop more self-awareness. The more self-aware you are, the more you can practice self-love and forgiveness of others.

7. Forgive others (and yourself) and set yourself free

Forgiveness is an act of self-liberation more than anything. You don’t forgive another for the sake of being a self-righteous saint, you forgive to release the burden of resentment from your heart. Think about all of the grudges you may be holding right now.

What can you do to find peace through forgiveness? Keep in mind that it is healthy for you to also show self-forgiveness. Read more about practicing forgiveness if you need help.

8. Practice loving yourself and others exactly “as is”

Unconditional love means embracing all of the nice, nasty, and ugly things about yourself and others. Remember that no one is perfect nor can anyone ever be perfect. Life is a constant journey of growth.

Don’t love others based on what they look like, have, or do, love a person exactly as they are in the moment, simply because they are worthy of being loved. The same advice applies to you: embrace all the pain, woundedness, and imperfection within you. Love it without conditions.

What is unconditional love? It is absolute acceptance and openness to yourself and others; it is the most powerful force in the universe.


Written By: Aletheia Luna
Originally Appeared On: Loner Wolf

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)

How to show unconditional love?

To show and practice unconditional love, you will have to put your own needs to the side and be encouraging and supportive of others. True love is rare, so be patient and kind.

How to overcome conditional love?

To let go of conditional love means recognizing and accepting what is in your best interests and waiting for the ideal moment to achieve your ambitions.

What Unconditional Love pin
What is Unconditional Love pin

— Share —

— About the Author —

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *



Up Next

Invisible String Theory Explained: The Untold Story Of The Hidden Strings Of The Universe

Invisible String Theory Explained: Seven Ways To Make It Work

There’s a cool idea out there that the universe is a big show orchestrated by something called the Invisible String Theory. The gist is that our world isn’t just a mess of stuff and energy, but rather a neat setup managed by unseen strings. These threads, thinner than the thinnest hair, keep the whole show on the road. So, if you are a hopeless romantic, this theory will surely pique your interest.

The Invisible String Theory is a friendly cousin of the nerdy string theory in science circles. String theory says that when you zoo



Up Next

10 Passionate And Intense Signs You’re In Spiritual Love

Passionate And Intense Signs Youre In Spiritual Love

Have you ever experienced a love that transcends the ordinary? A love that transforms your life and the way you perceive the world? If your answer is yes, then you are one of the lucky ones who have experienced the power of spiritual love.

Welcome, fellow seekers to our channel where we embark on this journey of self-discovery and divine connection, and  explore how extraordinary and powerful spiritual love can truly be.

So, what are the signs of spiritual love?

10 Passionate And Intense Signs You’re In Spiritual Love

1. You trust eac



Up Next

How To Overcome The Fear Of Losing Someone You Love: 10 Tips

How To Overcome The Fear Of Losing Someone You Love: Ten Tips

Have you ever lain awake at night, gripped by the fear of losing someone you love? It’s a poignant question, striking a chord deep within, making us reflect on our most cherished relationships. 

It’s this visceral emotion, both beautifully human yet often distressing, that we will explore today. The better we are able to understand this innate fear, the better we will be able to learn how to overcome the fear of losing someone you love.

The Intricate Web of Human Connections

From the moment we are born, we form attachments. These relationships, whether with our parents, siblings, friends, or romantic partners, shape our existence. The fear of losing someone you love can often be traced back to



Up Next

When Love Isn’t Enough: 13 Reasons People Leave The One They Love

Reasons People Leave The One They Love

Falling in love is one of the most beautiful experiences in life. It brings joy, happiness, and a sense of fulfillment. But sometimes, despite all the love and commitment, people choose to leave the one they love.

What do you do when the person you once loved starts feeling more like a stranger? When romance turns routine, priorities shift, and trust breaks down?

Sometimes, no matter how hard you try, leaving the one you love becomes the only option. And it is one of the most difficult decisions you can make in your life. It’s not always a choice we want to make. But sometimes, it’s necessary, especially when staying can become toxic.

In this article, we’ll explore the 13 most common reasons people ultimately decide to walk away from the one they love.



Up Next

The 3 Zodiac Signs Who Never Get Over Their First Love!

Three Signs Who Never Get Over Their First Love: Complicated

For some, love is a thrill ride they’ll never forget, especially when it comes to their first love. Step into the cosmic arena and meet the zodiac signs who never get over their first love. 

While many manage to move on and find new flames to ignite their passions, there are those who simply can’t extinguish the flames of their initial romantic blaze. 

These zodiac signs, notorious for their sentimentality and persistence, are the ones who wear their heartbreak on their sleeves, wearing them with the kind of sass only the cosmos can muster.

In this article, we will delve into the cosmic tapestry to expose the 3 zodiac signs who never get over their first love.



Up Next

What Does Unrequited Love Mean? Understanding Its Meaning And Impact

What Does Unrequited Love Mean? Nine Signs You're In One

Love, the exquisite tapestry of emotions that colors our lives, can occasionally lead us down a path strewn with the pain of unreciprocated affection. Let us find out more about what does unrequited love mean and how to deal with it in a healthy way.

What is unrequited love? 

Unrequited love refers to an intense romantic affection one person feels for another, while the feelings are not reciprocated. It’s the ache of affection unreturned, the yearning for a heart that remains indifferent. 



Up Next

What Makes A Man Obsessed With A Woman: The Science Of Attraction

What Makes A Man Obsessed With A Woman

Love without passion can often feel bland. Every woman wants a man who will be passionately in love with her. But what makes a man obsessed with a woman? Let us delve into the depths of emotion and unravel the mysterious allure that makes a man obsessed with a woman. 

What makes a man obsessed with a woman?

Love, attraction, and desire are intricate and complex emotions. Within the realm of romantic relationships, there are instances where a man becomes deeply infatuated, even bordering on