3 Things To Avoid If You Want Him To Ask You On A Second Date

 / 

,
Things Avoid Want Him Ask Second Date

If you are eagerly planning for your crucial second date, then you have hit the right post. Knowing what to do is sometimes not enough! You also need to know what not to do. Here’s what to avoid if you want him to ask you on a second date.

One of my male friends recently found himself in a really common situation that I want to talk about today.

He met a new woman on Tinder and initiated their in-person meeting after exchanging a weekโ€™s worth of text messages and calls. It went well. Their phone conversations were good and went longโ€“ sometimes running an hour or two. After their first meeting, they talked daily.

The following Wednesday, after he got in touch to say hello, she asked what he was planning to do that day.

He listed what he was planning. His response didnโ€™t include her or much of anything else besides spending time with his son and finishing out his busy workday.

She responded with โ€œso Iโ€™m not seeing you this week?โ€

As he often does, he got in touch with me to share his annoyance with her approach.

So what happened here?

What went wrong asking about second date?

First, she pre-rejected herself. 

She took his response as a rejection and then reacted to the perceived rejection.

But my friend wasnโ€™t actually rejecting her.

He was simply answering her question. He didnโ€™t have a grand plan for what he was doing with this woman. He was just going about his normal day.

Related: 5 Most Likely Reasons Youโ€™re Not Girlfriend Material

Next, she implied that he was doing something wrong by not asking her out yet.

This was a normal Wednesday for him. 

For her to say โ€œso Iโ€™m not seeing you this weekโ€, she implied that he was doing something wrong by not scheduling a dateโ€ฆ yet.

And itโ€™s Wednesday.

When: A Girl Is In Love, You Can See It In Her Smile

Some women sabotage themselves when they fall for the mistaken idea that if a guy doesnโ€™t make plans for the weekend by the beginning of the week, he doesnโ€™t want to see them at all.

This was the furthest thing from his mind. To him, they were in touch. 

Whether he was or was not planning anything at that moment is irrelevant since he was interested enough to be speaking to her daily in the first place.

She basically made up something in her head about what he should/should not be doing and then passive aggressively attacked him over it.

Related: When You Meet The Right Person At The Wrong Time

Third, nagging a man about his behavior is not a good way to inspire him long term (or even short term in this case).

The sad part about this exchange is that her comment was actually meant as a bid to see him again. Instead, it came off naggy and out of place because it came from a place of lack and rejection. 

Even this short comment made him want nothing to do with her.

And unfortunately, thatโ€™s how quickly masculine energy people will disappear when they feel disrespected.

So, why was her comment disrespectful to him?

Because it points to a lack of respect for his timing. And the masculine energy source absolutely rules timing.

When you disrespect a masculine manโ€™s timing by being passive-aggressive about his choices like this, he will not give you more time. He will give you less.

If she wasnโ€™t in her own anxiety about what he was doing, she could have tackled this situation with him in several different ways:

She could have gone into her own masculine and asked him out herself.

She could have waited and let him make a plan.

She could have done nothing (including having no anxiety about any of it) from a place of total security in her own irresistibility (best and what I teach inside my group coaching program Manifest True Love).

In the last position, she would have been at her most irresistible and he would have been at his most likely to be very attracted to her and ask her for a second date.

Iโ€™m not saying this to be hard on her or make either one of them into saintly beings with perfect dating behavior.

My point is to explain what happens when people let their anxiety take control of their dating situation.

Being in the feminine energy is great. 

Being in masculine energy is great.

Being in anxiety is not.

A primarily masculine person in anxiety will be over-controlling and crush the feminineโ€™s emotional processing, which will prevent her feelings for him from growing.

A feminine person in anxiety will lose faith and patience in their own attractiveness and irresistibility.

This womanโ€™s behavior points to her wanting to be the feminine partner because she wants HIM to make a plan.

Doing and initiating and planning is inherently masculine energy.

Thereโ€™s nothing wrong with her initiating as long as she wants to be the masculine partner.

And thereโ€™s nothing wrong with waiting for him to ask her back out (even if he never chooses to do so) if she wants to be in her feminine.

In this case, sheโ€™s doing neither one since sheโ€™s in anxiety.

Her statement gives away that sheโ€™s not able to respect his timing OR go all the way into her masculine and ask him back out.

Since heโ€™s interested in being the masculine partner, he would be much more excited about the relationship if she let him pursue her.

Finding a way to ask to see him again might not be fatal either, since there are many ways to inspire a man to make a plan. 

Or she could make one herself if she chooses to be in the masculine.

Related: 20 Things You Must Know Before Dating A Sarcastic Woman

But passively aggressively nagging a man who has not decided to make a plan will not inspire his devotion.

All this approach did was make him completely resistant to even speaking to her ever again.

And sadly, she probably hoped to see him again. Otherwise she wouldnโ€™t have brought it up.

Have you ever snapped at a man because you were worried he didnโ€™t want you?

I know I have.

This is just one of the love blocks I cover in my 7 Blocks to Manifesting Love Masterclass which you can find here.

Click here to sign up now.

Related video:


Written by: Elizabeth Stone
Originally appeared on: attracttheone.com
and is republished here with permission.
Things Avoid Want Him Ask Second Date pin

— Share —

— About the Author —

Leave a Reply



Up Next

Are You Hesitant To Commit? 6 Warning Signs Of Lack Of Commitment In A Relationship And How To Navigate Them

Signs of Lack of Commitment in a Relationship: Red Flags

Do you always find yourself in short-term, casual relationships? Does the idea of committing in a relationship make you nervous? Are you showing signs of lack of commitment in a relationship?

Commitment issues can be a significant barrier to building a healthy and fulfilling partnership, affecting both individuals involved. Today, let us explore what are commitment issues, the signs that may indicate their presence, the underlying causes of commitment issues, and effective strategies to overcome them.

By understanding these factors, you can empower yourself to navigate the complexities of relationships with greater confidence and clarity.

Are You Afraid of Commitment?



Up Next

6 Signs Of Soft Ghosting: Decoding The Art Of Disappearing

Signs Of Soft Ghosting: Decoding The Art Of Disappearing

Imagine a scenario where you’re texting someone you like, and everything seems great. Then, out of nowhere, they stop replying, and you’re stuck not knowing what’s really going on. This is just one of the signs of soft ghosting.

Soft ghosting is usually a bit different from the usual ghosting because it’s more gradual. Imagine being left hanging without any explanation; it feels like a half-hearted response. You aren’t completely ignored, but you’re clearly not at the top of their list.

So, what is soft ghosting, really? And how to deal with soft ghosting? Let’s first try to understand what is soft ghosting.<



Up Next

How To Move On From A Situationship? 3 Things That Can Help You

How To Move On From A Situationship? Things That Can Help

If you have ever been in a situationship, you know that it still hurts when it ends. So, how to move on from a situationship? In this article, we are going to talk about some of the best things to do if you’re trying to move on from a situationship.

A โ€œsituationshipโ€ is a romantic and/or sexual relationship that isnโ€™t formally defined. You may know it by its other pop culture references like โ€œfriends with benefits,โ€ โ€œfun buddies,โ€ or โ€œbooty call.โ€

People in situationships generally arenโ€™t exclusively committed to each other and typically arenโ€™t expected to fork over a ton of emotional investment.



Up Next

6 Things Single People Are Tired Of Hearing: Hearing It On Repeat

Things Single People Are Tired Of Hearing: Enough Already

Being single is not a crime, nor is it something to feel sorry about. There are so many things single people are tired of hearing, and they just want all those “well-wishers” to just zip it. Let’s explore 6 of the most annoying things single people are sick of hearing, and the things single people hate hearing.

KEY POINTS

Despite their good intentions, family and friends often give harmful advice to single people.

It’s important for daters not to get so overwhelmed that they ignore their own values.

Relationships can progress at different speeds and intensities and stil



Up Next

11 Types Of Dating Trends Popular Among Gen-Z: Stay Up-to-Date with the Latest Lingo!

Types Of Dating Trends Popular Among Gen-Z In

Welcome to the wild and wacky world of Gen Z dating trends! Itโ€™s bound to be a rollercoaster. In this digital age, where swiping right is as customary as saying hi, thereโ€™s a certain way Gen Z has perfected the art of connecting, through their different and dare I say interesting types of dating trends.

With situationships thatโ€™ll have you scratching your head to love hazes thatโ€™ll have you say โ€œbeen there!โ€ weโ€™re diving into 11 popular gen z dating trends that will leave you feeling confused and intrigued at the same time.

So buckle up for the ride ahead and get ready to navigate the dicey wor



Up Next

5 Signs Of Dating Burnout:ย Hitting The Wall in Love?

Signs Of Dating Burnout: Hitting The Wall in Love?

Ever felt like you’ve hit a brick wall in your love life? That’s dating burnout for you, and it’s more common than you think. It’s that overwhelming feeling when the search for “The One” starts to feel more like a chore than a journey of the heart. Let’s dive into the five telltale signs that you might be experiencing this modern love dilemma.

KEY POINTS

Burnout is usually characterized by a feeling that no matter what one does, nothing will improve, often leading to feelings of apathy.

One study found that 78 percent of adults aged 18-54 have experienced online dating burnout.



Up Next

Dating With Low Self Esteem? 6 Tips For Navigating The Dating Scene with Confidence

Dating With Low Self Esteem? Tips For Being More Confident

Ah, the exciting universe of dating! Dating in the modern world can feel like a rollercoaster filled with thrilling emotions and fluttering hearts. But what do you do when you suffer from low self esteem? What does it look like, dating with low self esteem?

Dating with low self esteem can feel as difficult as trying to solve a Rubik’s cube with one hand tied behind your back. Interactions may be marred by negative self-perceptions which can make you doubt your worth and desirability. However, donโ€™t let that scare you, because low self-esteem does not necessarily mean doom.

In this article, we are going to t