5 Signs You Are Afraid Of Being Seen: Invisible Walls

 / 

, ,
Signs You Are Afraid Of Being Seen: Invisible Walls

Do you ever feel like you are afraid of being seen, and that’s why you have erected several walls around you so that no one can see your vulnerable side? This article is going to explore five signs you are afraid of being seen and what the fear of being seen really means.

Deep down, most of us want to be seen and accepted for who we are. Showing up fully in your relationships and allowing yourself to be seen is a vulnerable experience that requires you to let your guard down.

On the one hand, taking such a risk can feel incredibly anxiety-provoking, while on the other hand, not taking such a risk can cause your relationships to feel stagnant and block them from growing.

The fear of being seen for who you really are can be a deep-rooted fear that you may not even be aware is impacting your relationships. If the need to be accepted for who you are wasn’t met early on or during a crucial stage of development, you may yearn for a deeper connection with others but subconsciously build up barriers against it to protect yourself.

You may have grown up in a family that pushed certain norms or rules that didn’t feel authentic to you, or perhaps their love for you felt conditional and there wasn’t space or acknowledgment for your true feelings, needs, and preferences.

Alternatively, being bullied or misunderstood by peers might have created a similar experience for you.

As a result, you may long to be seen and accepted for who you truly are but associate being seen with feeling unsafe and rejected. Feeling connected to others is an innate human need, so if this need was perceived as a threat when you were growing up, you may have sacrificed your authenticity to maintain your connection with others.

You may not even realize the effect this fear has had on you as many of these coping patterns become automatic over time and can operate outside of your conscious awareness.

Related: How To Stay Strong And Trust Again When You’ve Been Hurt Before

5 Signs You Are Afraid Of Being Seen

If you’re wondering whether the fear of being seen for who you are is impacting your relationships, consider the following signs.

1. You often feel lonely or isolated even if you have many friends.

2. You keep others at arm’s length by masking the parts of yourself that you deem unworthy to show them.

3. You over-function in your relationships, often focusing exclusively on the other person’s needs without ever voicing your own.

4. You struggle with perfectionism and work hard to obtain approval from others in order to prevent rejection.

5. You distance yourself from others or self-sabotage as soon as you start to get close in various ways by rejecting them before they can reject you.

When you are afraid of being seen

All of these signs are ways you may have learned to cope to protect yourself from rejection and having the same painful experience from the past.

The hidden cost of these coping strategies is that keeping others at arm’s length only allows your relationships to progress to a certain level of connection before they plateau or become stagnant.

If you learned to associate being authentic with being rejected as a result of your past experiences, it makes sense that you would protect yourself in these various ways.

If you struggle with the fear of being seen, it may be helpful to reflect about what it is costing you to continue to allow this fear to influence your decisions. Consider testing the waters by choosing to reveal a low-risk share with someone in your life.

It doesn’t matter what you share as long as it doesn’t feel high stakes and feels authentic to you. This might look like telling someone you miss them or sharing an opinion you have that hasn’t been shared with others yet.

Related: Why You Should Get To Know Your Fears

Another option to consider is individual therapy and/or a support group. Being in a supportive space with others who are sharing authentically may help you to feel more comfortable doing so and if a group setting feels too overwhelming, individual therapy can be a great alternative option where you can address the fear of being seen in a safe space.

Ready to create more satisfying relationships? Dr. Roxy’s free Relationship Needs Guide can help you identify what you want from a relationship, whether you’re single or in a relationship. Sign up for her monthly emails here and download your copy today.


Written By Roxy Zarrabi
Originally Appeared On Psychology Today
fear of being seen

— Share —

— About the Author —

Leave a Reply



Up Next

Are Empaths On The Autism Spectrum? Exploring Similarities And Uniqueness

Are Empaths on the Autism Spectrum? Important Similarities

Ever thought, “are empaths on the autism spectrum”? Let’s explore the shared traits and unique aspects of both. Discover the gifts and hurdles that come with being an empath or being on the autism spectrum.

Are Empaths on the Autism Spectrum?

autism and empathy

I often get asked the question “Are empaths on the autistic spectrum” because of their similar tendencies to experience sensory overload from noise, ligh



Up Next

How To Stay Psychologically Healthy At Any Age: The Evergreen Mind

How To Stay Psychologically Healthy At Any Age: Mind Matters

Just like your physical health is important, psychological well-being and psychological wellness are equally vital to for living a happy, and healthy life. This article is going to talk about how to stay psychologically healthy, irrespective of age.

KEY POINTS

The health of the American population overall is declining as demographic shifts occur.

Staying psychologically healthy has positive effects on physiological health.

Maintaining social connections and building resilience as you age are equally important for mental well-being.

For the past several decades, the Am



Up Next

6 Inspiring Lessons From Spiritual Leaders On Mental Health

Spiritual Leaders On Mental Health: Inspiring Lessons

Amid the hustle and bustle of modern life, stress becomes a constant companion, that’s why learning from spiritual leaders on mental health is more important than ever!

Many people turn to spiritual leaders as their guides in this journey, seeking wisdom and solace from different traditions.

With centuries of experience to back them up, these leaders have plenty to say about nurturing the soul and building inner peace. Here are some things that they’ve said about spirituality and mental health.

Let us take a look at them and gain some wisdom!

6 Lessons From Spiritual Leaders On Mental Health



Up Next

The Healing Power Of Forest Bathing: Finding Serenity In The Woods

Forest Bathing: The Best Thing To Do For Better Health

If you ever feel like you are running on an empty tank and can really use a recharge, then try out forest bathing. Take a trip down to the woods and soak up on the goodness that nature has to offer, revive your energy, melt away your stress, and feel as fresh as a daisy.

KEY POINTS

“Forest bathing,” which means walking in a natural environment, has powerful physical and psychological effects.

Forest bathing causes a drop in stress hormones, calms your nervous system, and reduces blood pressure.

Forest bathing reduces feelings of anger, confusion, depression, fatigue, and anxiety.



Up Next

Understanding The Sylvia Plath Effect: How Mental Turmoil Fuels Artistic Brilliance

The Sylvia Plath Effect: How Mental Turmoil Fuels Artistic Brilliance

Poets have long been seen as depressed souls. But why? Is there a deep connection between creativity and mental illnesses? Why do writers and poets who can create such  greatest works of art, literature, and poetry struggle with depression? Let’s delve into the world of writers grappling with the Sylvia Plath Effect.

Creativity is a blessing that each and every writer is always grateful for. But it can also be a curse for some. Why? Writers and poets think deeply. They feel everything from the core of their heart. 

They are sensitive souls who often repress their own emotions and pour it out on the page, expressing their deepest thoughts and feelings, and joys and sorrows through their work.

While this can help them to create literary masterpieces, it can also



Up Next

10 Movies That Inaccurately Portray Mental Health

Bad Portrayals Of Mental Illness In Movies: Films

Movies are powerful tools that shape our thoughts and influence our ideas. But there are some bad portrayals of mental illness in movies that don’t quite match reality.

By consistently depicting harmful stereotypes and misconceptions about mental health, these movies have made a slight mockery of an incredibly serious condition.

Of course, there are some movies that did try their hardest to show authenticity and accuracy in their depiction of mental health conditions – but many fail to even come close.

While they may have had good intentions with how they presented these characters, all they’ve really done is reinforce stigmas and set back any sort of progress being made to understand and support those with MH challenges.

So, we’re going to



Up Next

How To Stop A Racing Mind: 7 Techniques For Mastering Mental Turbulence

How To Stop A Racing Mind: Ways To Tame A Racing Mind

Ever found yourself lying in bed, desperately trying to sleep after a long, tiring day, but your mind refuses to do so? It feels like your mind is racing like a Formula 1 car on caffeine. Don’t worry, we’ve all been there! That relentless stream of thoughts can feel overwhelming, leaving you feeling restless and exhausted. So, how to stop a racing mind?

In this article, we’ll talk about the meaning of racing thoughts and how to calm a busy mind. Let’s explore the seven best ways to stop your mind from racing, and discover the blissful art of finding your inner calm amidst all the chaos.

First, let’s talk about the meaning of racing thoughts.

Related: