Research Proves The Most Successful Relationships Come Down to 3 Basic Traits


Research Proves The Most Successful Relationships Come Down to 3 Basic Traits

There are plenty of opinions out there about what you should do to ensure a happy, long-lasting relationship. Here’s what science says.

It’s not easy to maintain a relationship because it requires a great deal of effort from both sides. Both partners have to want it enough and work very hard for it.

Often, they realize that whatever they have with the other person is not enough for all the work that they’ve done and all the sacrifices they’ve made and so the relationship soon goes down the drain.

But at the same time, they don’t really think about where their issues stem from in the relationships. They think that they’re breaking up because they’re always having fights but they don’t try to get to the source of that anger.

The end of a relationship is actually influenced by a lot of factors and it can actually be salvaged if we take a good hard look at our problems.

Research has shown us the three fundamentals of every successful relationship. In her eye-opening Ted talk, Helen Fisher, a biological anthropologist, tells us about the three fundamentals and how we can all apply them in our relationships.

You can watch the Ted talk below but if you’ve got a lot to do and can’t sit through the whole thing, just read the three fundamentals that can save a relationship below.

1.  Partners have to be able to empathize with each other

According to Fisher, the first essential for a successful relationship is the lovers being able to empathize with each other about things in the relationship. Unlike sympathy which you feel for the other person, empathy is when you put yourself in their place and feel all their emotions as if they were your very own. It’s not necessary for you to have felt that particular emotion before and you might not even understand it all that well. But it’s important to recognize that this is the way your partner feels and do your best to understand what they’re going through. It is also imperative to be kind and compassionate while dealing with them. Those who have a natural talent for empathy feel every emotion with a good deal of intensity and this helps them feel more connected to all the people they meet. By default, this also ensures that they’re very good with relationships.

It can be hard when one party empathizes with the other but it is not reciprocated by the other party. This will invariably result in one having a lot of issues with the other. But it is not an insurmountable problem. If the couple values the relationship enough, they can actively try harder to develop a better understanding of empathy when it comes to being there for the person they love. This will work wonder on their relationship.

It’s good because both will be able to see exactly what the other person is going through and they can put these issues out in the open and solve them by talking them out.

2.  Partners should be able to rein in their feelings when they’re in a situation that puts them under a lot of stress

The second fundamental that is essential for all relationships according to Fisher is the partners being able to rein in their feelings when they’re in a situation that puts them in a lot more stress than they’re usually accustomed to.  If we think about it, partners who spend a lot of time arguing about their finances are actually much more prone to breaking off their relationship than others who don’t argue about it as much. This is because the relationship is already a delicate, glass-like thing that can be shattered quite easily if it is not treated with care and caution. When you keep heaping piles of stress on it, sometimes it will be easier for the couple to just break things off, telling each other that they’ll be better off dealing with their financial situation without the presence of the other.

However, instead of fighting, if they had simply tried to control themselves and not being an argument, they could have just given each other the space to rant and let out all their pent-up emotions without telling the other person that is completely their fault. This can make or break a relationship quite easily.

Instead of arguing till both of you are blue in the face about whatever issues are affecting you and blowing off your anger on the other person, you can work on the problem while still showing each other respect and consideration. This will keep both of you together while also strengthening the very foundation of the relationship.

3.  Partners being able to focus on the bright side of things

Fisher also argues for the importance of having positive illusions in order to make the relationship strong enough to last in the long run. Positive illusions are like having pep-talks to inspire you to stay in the relationship. For example, you might have found your boyfriend’s snort while laughing very endearing when you first started dating but now that some time has passed, the sound begins to grate on you.

Rather than concentrating on what you don’t like, think about all the other instances when he is not making that noise. Doing this allows you to consider him in a different way. You can look at his character and his habits without feeling the need to high-tail it out of your relationship as fast as you can. Think about all the beautiful traits that your partner has; not about the few annoying habits they have. Sometimes, we just completely absorb ourselves in all the things we perceive as negative about our partners and let them take over all the quirks that we love about them.

Instead, if we just took the time to concentrate on all the wonderful things about the relationship, we can keep it going. It’s important to remember that we are all human and this naturally makes us flawed. So just look on the bright side to find happiness.

You may also like

Relationship Tips From a Happily Married Couple of 72 Years

3 Tips for Finding the Perfect Partner for You

5 Things You Should Always Keep Hidden About Your Relationship

6 Signs You’re In A Relationship With Your Soulmate

10 Secrets To Make Your Relationship Last A Lifetime

3 Ways to Handle Healthy Anger in Your Relationship

Relationship Betrayals That Have Nothing To Do With Cheating

The Minds Journal Articles Volume -1 is Copyright Protected vide Regd.# L-103222/2021

Research Proves The Most Successful Relationships Come Down to 3 Basic Traits

— Share —

— About the Author —

Leave a Reply

Up Next

What Is Breadcrumbing And Why Do We Fall Victim To It?

What Is Breadcrumbing And Why Do We Fall Victim To It?

Have you ever been on the other side of breadcrumbing? If you have, you know how horrible it feels. So, what is the best way to deal with this? Let’s find out, shall we?


Breadcrumbing is characterised by avoidance of intimacy and commitment uncertainty.

Breadcrumbers often want to seek attention from their partners and appear cool to their friends.

Dealing with breadcrumbing sometimes involves breadcrumbing others.

Breadcrumbing takes its name from the Grimm Brothers story of Hansel and Gretel — two children who in escaping from their wicked stepmother, dr

Up Next

Want To Try Speed Dating? 6 Mindful Tips To Make A Real Connection

What Is Speed Dating: Interesting Tips To Real Connections

Is speed dating the most effective way to find your soul mate through a series of mini dates? Do you feel like giving this exciting trend a try? Let’s see how it works.

This is an event format that allows people to go on many dates within a short time to talk with several people.

Let’s discuss what speed dating is like, how it operates, and some suggestions on optimizing your love life!

What Is Speed Dating?

Up Next

Is He Drifting Away? 8 Signs He Is Losing Interest And How To Turn Things Around

Signs He Is Losing Interest: Is He Drifting Away?

It’s one of the worst feelings in this world when the person you love, starts to lose interest in you. You thought that everything was going great and you are the happiest you have ever been, and then suddenly, you realize that he is acting very distant and emotionally detached. Today we are going to talk about the major signs he is losing interest.

Once you know these signs you will be able to better understand what’s actually going on in your relationship, instead of staying in a bubble, not knowing the truth. Also, why do guys act so interested then pull away? So annoying!

And we won’t just talk about the signs he is losing interest, but we will also provide some effective and useful tips regarding what to do when he lost interest.

Whether you are in a new relationship or have been together for years

Up Next

How Healthy Relationships Can Improve Your Physical Health

How Healthy Relationships Can Improve Your Physical Health

Healthy relationships are crucial for feeling happy, positive, and also physically healthy. The physical benefits of healthy relationships are a lot, and this article is going to talk about that in detail. Let’s find out the importance of having strong and healthy relationships.

Humans need humans to survive.

It’s no secret that a healthy relationship can bring joy and happiness to your life, but did you know that it can also have a positive impact on your physical health?

From reducing stress levels to boosting your immune system, there are many surprising health benefits to being in a happy partnership. Read on to learn more.

We are social creatures who thrive on strong, healthy relationships with friends, colleagues and family me

Up Next

When You Refuse To Let Go Of Someone You Love, Even When They Don’t Love You Anymore

Why You Should Let Go Of Someone You Love

I get it. You don’t want to let go of someone you love. Even when it’s clear that it’s over. Even when it’s clear that it is time and things will only get worse from here. Yet, you want to hold on just a little longer. But if you truly love someone let them go.

“No! No! It’s fine. It’s absolutely fine. It’s working. Listen to me, I know it’s working. This is normal. Show me a relationship that doesn’t have problems. I will make it work. I know I can. Just give me a little time. Just a little more time. Please, just bear with me for a second here. Please. Don’t take it away from me yet. Please. It’s not time. It can’t be. Will you just listen to me once for god’s sake?”

But deep down you know it in your heart. You just know it. It is screaming at you. And even though you may pretend you

Up Next

7 Warning Signs Of Losing Yourself In A Relationship And How to Rediscover Your Sense of Self

Signs Of Losing Yourself In A Relationship

Are you starting to feel like you have lost yourself in a relationship? Do you have this persistent feeling that you don’t know who you are anymore? You know, that feeling when you are so caught up in someone else’s world, that you forget who you are? Well, these are just some signs of losing yourself in a relationship.

Believe it or not, this is actually quite a common feeling, and lots of people experience this. If you have ever felt like you have lost yourself in a relationship, then this article can be a godsend for you.

Let’s delve into the all those signs of losing yourself in a relationship, so that you can stop yourself from doing so (at least to some extent!). And not just this, we will also talk about what to do when you lose yourself in a relationship. So, are you ready to explore this? Let’s go then!

Up Next

How To Let Go Of Someone You Are Desperately Trying To Hold On To

How To Let Go Of Someone You Are Trying To Hold On To

Do you know what happens when you desperately hold on to someone you really need to let go of? When you hold on to the idea of “us” and refuse to see the reality for what it is? You force the person you love the most in the world to hate you. You compel them to resent you. And in this process, you hurt yourself more than the other person did. This is why it’s crucial that we talk about how to let go of someone you don’t want to lose.

No one wants to let go of love

Especially when it’s the real deal. Especially when you’ve been told you are not worthy of love all your life. And this one person comes into your life and completely changes