Are you having conflict in your relationship? Even the happiest couples argue every now and again, but it is an unpleasant experience.
Research shows that the most common problems faced by couples today often revolve around money, jealousy, children, and sex. There are good reasons why any of these factors could lead to an unhappy marriage or even a divorce.
Without sex, you lack that emotional bond that keeps your relationship feeling fun and full of passion.
Disagreements about children can cause resentment to grow. Jealousy can lead to untrusting, reckless behavior. And don’t get us started about money.
One survey showed out of 748 instances of conflict, money was the most repetitive and salient argument between 100 couples.
Quotes are amazing because they can put your relationship in perspective within a single sentence.
Here are 5 of our favorite quotes that will help you and your partner put your differences aside and have a more enjoyable relationship.
“Arguing isn’t communication, it’s noise.” – Tony Gaskins
Communication is an important part of any marriage. Without it, a relationship will falter.
This is highlighted in this survey, in which 53 percent of 886 ex-couples cited a lack of communication as a strong factor in their reason to get a divorce.
Further studies show that couples who have healthy communication skills enjoy more satisfying sex lives and have increased overall relationship quality.
When you’re able to talk to your spouse in a clear and respectful manner, it brings you closer together. It teaches you how to resolve conflict as a team, instead of by attacking each other.
“This life is what you make it. No matter what, you’re going to mess up sometimes, it’s a universal truth. […] So keep your head high, keep your chin up, and most importantly, keep smiling, because life’s a beautiful thing and there’s so much to smile about.” – Marilyn Monroe
This excerpt is from one of Marilyn Monroe’s monologues. While the full speech refers to a deep friendship, it can also be applied to a loving relationship.
Life is too short to spend it arguing with the person you love the most.
The next time you are feeling frustrated over something trivial, think of all the things you love about your partner. Think of the ‘beautiful things’ they have given you to smile about and choose forgiveness over arguing.
“I can see that the sadness has returned. And it’s not a beautiful sadness- beautiful sadness is a myth. Sadness turns our features to clay, not porcelain.” – David Levithan
There is nothing beautiful about being sad in your relationship. You don’t want to make your partner upset or make them feel bad about themselves as a person.
You want to shower them with love and respect, even when you aren’t getting along.
One Australian study on what makes a lasting marriage found that partners who both view marriage as a sacred institution enjoy happier relationships.
They are also less likely to get divorced because they view the union as something important. This causes them to put more effort into saving a marriage when it is in trouble, instead of keeping the option of divorce in their back pocket.
Instead of choosing to dwell in sadness and conflict, look for creative ways to solve disagreements and promote peace.
“Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage.” – Lao Tzu
When you deeply love your partner, you gain strength. A healthy relationship should make you feel like you can do anything. It helps you pursue your dreams and gives you comfort and courage in life.
Resolving an argument is about putting things in perspective. There’s another great saying, often quoted by Dr. Phil, which says: “Do you want to be happy or do you want to be right?
This simple phrase reminds us that being right isn’t the be all and end all of a relationship. If your conflict is insignificant (or means very little to you but very much to your partner) why not just let it go? Choose happiness over haughtiness.
“The most important thing in an argument, next to being right, is to leave an escape hatch for your opponent so that he can gracefully swing over to your side without too much apparent loss of face.” – Sydney J. Harris
As previously mentioned, it is perfectly natural for even the happiest of couples to disagree on occasion. But how you handle these disagreements says a lot about how successful your relationship will be.