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Keeping Love Alive: How To Stop Your Soulmate From Becoming A Cellmate

Keeping Love Alive

Keeping love alive in a relationship requires proper communication and attention. Otherwise, soulmate relationships can even become cellmate relationships and tenacious.

So, is your partner your soulmate or cellmate? Being in a relationship with your soulmate doesn’t mean that it will be effortless. Even in a committed relationship, it demands our undivided attention and time. Learn how to keep love alive in a relationship.

As a psychiatrist and, personally, as an empath, I’ve learned that being in an intimate relationship requires ongoing creative, honest conversations with your mate. As my Daoist teacher says, “Your soulmate can become your cellmate” if you’re not both dedicated to mutual growth and authenticity.

It’s painful to be in a relationship where communication isn’t a priority: the one you love the most can seem like the enemy. Such a lack of mutual understanding isn’t viable for empaths if they want to feel well.

A soulmate is a meant-to-be relationship with someone for whom you feel a strong connection. When you meet, something in you awakens. You want to support each other’s souls and be each other’s safe place to land.

Keeping Love Alive
Keeping Love Alive: Communication In A Relationship

A soulmate can be a lover, a friend, a co-worker, a teacher, or another pivotal relationship in your life. Whatever the relationship, you can take each other further in your own emotional and spiritual growth than either of you could go alone. 

Still, soulmate relationships aren’t always peaceful or without conflicts. When the honeymoon phase ends, suddenly this idealized person may be irritating you and has so many flaws! You mirror each other’s light and dark sides. Your fears, anxieties, and other unresolved emotional triggers surface. It can be overwhelming and make this person seem more like a cellmate during this phase.

Read: Even Your Soulmate Will Cause Relationship Problems

Keeping Love Alive: How To Stop Your Soulmate From Becoming A Cellmate
How To Keep Love Alive In A Relationship: Loving Your Soulmate

Try to embrace your emotional triggers as opportunities for spiritual growth. Your soulmate is not your savior or your therapist, but rather someone whom you can love and learn from. When both partners are on the path to growth, your relationship will be a portal into the mysteries of intimacy. Seeing the union in this way helps you open your hearts even more.

Now, I’m better able to voice my own needs with my partner and he is open to listening. He’s not afraid of my intense emotions, which makes me feel safe. (I was always wary of being “too intense” with men for fear of rejection). 

Keeping Love Alive With Your Soulmate

To be comfortable enough to let go and be real with a soulmate here are some tips:

  1. Set healthy boundaries about your time and energy requirements such as “I’d love to go out but only for an hour.”  
  2. Express your authentic needs such as “I want to take some alone time now” or “I need you to really hear what I’m feeling about__.”
  3. To find balance listen to your partner’s emotions with an open heart, and your partner can listen to yours. That’s when real intimacy becomes possible.
Keeping Love Alive: How To Stop Your Soulmate From Becoming A Cellmate
Keeping Love Alive With Communication In A Relationship

In addition, you can utilize the following intention from Thriving as an Empath.

Set your intention. I will have realistic expectations of a soulmate and not think of them as my savior. I will take responsibility for my own growth. I want to heal anything in myself that keeps me from loving. I will try to heal anything that keeps me from loving.

Adapted from Thriving as an Empath: 365 Days of Self-Care for Sensitive People

If you want to learn more about soulmate relationships, here is a video to help you out:


Written By: Judith Orloff M.D.
Keeping Love Alive pin
Keeping Love Alive: How To Stop Your Soulmate From Becoming A Cellmate

Dr. Judith Orloff

Judith Orloff, MD is the New York Times best-selling author of The Empath’s Survival Guide: Life Strategies for Sensitive People. Her new book Thriving as an Empath offers daily self-care tools for sensitive people along with its companion The Empath’s Empowerment Journal. Dr. Orloff is a psychiatrist, an empath, and is on the UCLA Psychiatric Clinical Faculty. She synthesizes the pearls of traditional medicine with cutting edge knowledge of intuition, energy, and spirituality. Dr. Orloff also specializes in treating highly sensitive, empathic people in her private practice. Dr. Orloff’s work has been featured on The Today Show, CNN, Oprah Magazine, the New York Times. Dr. Orloff has spoken at Google-LA and has a popular TEDX talk. Her other books are Thriving as an Empath: 365 Days of Self-Care for Sensitive People, The Empowered Empath’s Journal, Emotional Freedom and Guide to Intuitive Healing. Explore more information about her Empath Support Online course and speaking schedule on www.drjudithorloff.com. View Author posts