What Is Control Addiction and How To Deal With It

Control Addiction Deal With It

During meditation, a powerful mantra echoed, “I let go of the anxiety and desperation of my limited self and make space for universal intelligence to flow through and guide me”.

At that moment, I got it. I got I wasn’t alone, and I needed to replace this constant forcing to make things happen according to my defined timelines, and trust that I would get there by taking action daily.

The realization was I have zero control.

Once I had internalised that, I could let go of trying to bend reality to my personal preferences and only allow myself to be happy and content if it matched my picture of what reality should be.

I could be the guest and enjoy the show despite what was on the agenda.

With genuine faith, I could let go of the belief that life was happening to me and instead accept that life was happening for me.

Every challenge gave me a lesson, and I trusted I would be better for having experienced it. It was there for my growth.

letting go will teach you the art of being soft and humble, yet powerful and free.


I hope you recognise yourself in some of these points. What can you do now to break the cycle of the control addiction and let go? 

As with most things, it begins with a better set of questions.

· Identify your control addiction device and ask yourself if it is serving you?

· Can you find the self-compassion to act with more kindness towards yourself?

· How do you want to show up to yourself and your family?

· What if you gave yourself recovery time unconditionally without having earned it?

· How can you fulfil the need for certainty more productively?

· What would it be like to experience your day content despite what comes up?

Letting go is a daily practice, and even when you think you have it right, life presents you with something, and you feel like you are at the beginning again.

In the words of Steve Maraboli “Incredible change happens in your life when you decide to take control of what you have power over instead of craving control over what you don’t”.

Here’s to letting go,

Warm wishes


Written by: Lori Milner
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Originally appeared on: Beyond The Dress
Republished with permission
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