25+ Funny Quotes That Will Make Your Day


Funny Quotes That Will Make Your Day

Are you looking for funny quotes to make everyone laugh? Well, you’ve come to the right place – witty comebacks and clever jokes for all occasion. Here’s a complete guide for funny quotes about life.

Did you know that hilarious quotes and sayings are good for your health? As the old saying says, “Laughter is the best medicine“, having humor in our lives can be a major stress reliever. It can even regulate our blood pressure.

Want to bring back a smile on everyone’s face? Let’s go on a quest to find the best and inspirational funny quotes. These hilarious quotes about life that we have collected from great authors, to leaders, to amazing public speakers, and it will surely make you laugh and nod in agreement.

Here’s a list of funny quotes and sayings which will make you laugh out loud.

1. “I’m sick of following my dreams, man. I’m just going to ask where they’re going and hook up with ’em later.”
— Mitch Hedberg

 2. “Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way when you criticize them, you are a mile away from them and you have their shoes.”
— Jack Handey

Before You Criticize Someone
Funny Quotes: 25+ Hilarious Quotes That Will Make Your Day

Related: 9 Clever Mind Games Narcissists Play In Relationships

3. Breaking up is like knocking over a Coke machine. You can’t do it in one push; you got to rock it back and forth a few times, and then it goes over.” — Jerry (Jerry Seinfeld)

4. “You know you’ve reached middle age when you’re cautioned to slow down by your doctor, instead of by the police.” — Joan Rivers

5. “The best way to teach your kids about taxes is by eating 30 percent of their ice cream.” — Bill Murray

Funny Quotes Make Your Day the best way to teach

6.  “A good rule to remember for life is that when it comes to plastic surgery and sushi never is attracted by a bargain.” — Graham Norton

7. “If you’re going to do something tonight that you’ll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late.” — Henny Youngman

Funny Quotes: 25+ Hilarious Quotes That Will Make Your Day

8. “Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves?” — Robin Williams

9. “Anyone who lives within their means suffers from a lack of imagination.” — Oscar Wilde

10. Cal: “You are really pushing my buttons today.”
Becky: “Which one is ‘mute’?” — Waitress, the Musical

11. “To succeed in life, you need three things: a wishbone, a backbone, and a funny bone.” — Reba McEntire

Funny Quotes Make Your Day to succeed in life

12. “Thanksgiving dinners take 18 hours to prepare. They are consumed in 12 minutes. Half-times take 12 minutes. This is not a coincidence.” — Erma Bombeck

Related: 50+ Leonardo DiCaprio Quotes That Will Get You Going On The Road To Success

13. “I just realized that ‘Let me check my calendar’ is the adult version of ‘Let me ask my mom.’” — Noelle Chatham

Funny Famous Quotes To Make You Laugh

14. “Halloween is the beginning of the holiday shopping season. That’s for women. The beginning of the holiday shopping season for men is Christmas Eve.” David Letterman

15. “If an apology is followed by an excuse or a reason, it means they are going to commit the same mistake again they just apologized for.” ― Amit Kalantri

16. God put me on this earth to accomplish a certain number of things. Right now I am so far behind that I will never die.  ― Humorist Bill Watterson

Hilarious Quotes About Love and Life

17. “I don’t believe in astrology; I’m a Sagittarius and we’re skeptical.” — Arthur C. Clarke

Funny Quotes Make Your Day dont believe in astrology

18. Sometimes I get the feeling the whole world is against me, but deep down I know that’s not true. Some of the smaller countries are neutral. ― Robert Orben

19. Life expectancy would grow by leaps and bounds if green vegetables smelled as good as bacon. ― Doug Larson

20. I know God promises not to give me more than I can handle. I just wish he didn’t trust me so much. ― Mother Teresa

Famous Funny Quotes To Make You Laugh

21. “I walk around like everything’s fine, but deep down, inside my shoe, my sock is sliding off.” —Anonymous

22. “I never feel more alone than when I’m trying to put sunscreen on my back.” —Jimmy Kimmel

Funny Quotes Make Your Day i never feel more alone

23. “You know your friendship is strong when it’s solely built on tagging each other in memes with absolutely no other forms of communication.”

Funny Quotes About Love & Friendships

24. “Common sense is like deodorant. The people who need it most never use it.” —Anonymous

25. “I’m not good at the advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?” —Chandler (Matthew Perry), Friends

Funny Quotes Make Your Day sarcastic comment

26. “Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow Internet service to see who they really are.” —Will Ferrell

27. The trouble with being punctual is that nobody’s there to appreciate it. – Franklin  ― P. Jones

Funny Quotes And Sayings About Life
Funny Quotes: 20+ Hilarious Quotes And Sayings About Life

28. “My favorite machine at the gym is the vending machine.” — Caroline Rhea

29. “The worst part of online shopping is having to get up and get your credit card from your purse.” —Anonymous

Funny Quotes Make Your Day worst part of online shopping

There you have it, whenever you find yourself down, just read these funny quotes and refresh yourself with a dose of laughter! Comment your favorite quote below!

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