Dating during the coronavirus is seeming like a huge challenge, isn’t it?
As luck would have it, a fair number of my clients have JUST met people who are contenders to win their heart and now, unfortunately, they are all wondering about dating during the coronavirus. Can their new relationship survive this unprecedented challenge?
Budding relationships are so fun and exciting and they make the world a better place. They are also fraught with unknowns and uncertainties, ones often navigated the more you spend time together.
In this new world, time together is not something we have easy access to but it doesn’t have to mean the end of a new relationship.
How do you survive dating in the coronavirus? How do you continue to build a connection that is strong enough to make it through?
It is possible. Here are some ideas.
1. Think big picture.
I know that today our future looks bleak. Stay at home orders and reports of the spread of the virus have brought all of us down.
But it’s not going to last forever. And when it’s over, life will go on.
An essential part of living a full life is love and relationships. Because of that, dating during the coronavirus should involve keeping an eye on the future, an eye on finding that person with whom you want to spend the rest of your life.
So, in these dark times, try to keep the rest of your life insight and not focus on the here and now. If you do only look at today, you might find yourself overwhelmed and not hopeful about the future. If you do that, when this is all over, you just might find yourself alone.
2. Do things differently.
For many of my clients, they are frustrated because they can’t follow their normal dating routines. The things that they have always done to get to know someone is now not an option.
And I say “Great.”
One of the reasons that you are still dating and not in a relationship might be because what you have been doing so far hasn’t been working. Of course, part of it is that you haven’t met the right person but part of it could be that, in this modern world of dating, there are many opportunities for things to go astray.
Online dating, with its vast opportunities for hookups, often leaves us ghosted. The lack of available time to give to a partner makes it difficult for connections to get fully made. The speed with which we have sex can often kill a relationship before it starts.
So, now we have an opportunity to do things differently.
For hundreds of years, before the advent of social media people got to know each other differently. During the war years, relationships were built and maintained through letters, letters that often took weeks or months to be delivered. When I was growing up, we talked on the phone for hours and hours until our parents or roommates got sick of listening to us and guilted us off.
Many of my clients tell me that they ‘hate talking on the phone and can’t even conceive of writing a letter’ but why not try to do things differently. Look back on your past relationships, the ones that haven’t worked doing it the modern way and do things differently.
Of course, modern technology does give us the opportunity to interact face to face and in real-time with prospective partners during this time but I also encourage you to go old school and see what happens.
This is an opportunity to date in a way that you never have before – maybe it will work out differently this time!
3. Respect each other’s fears.
In our house, my boyfriends and my way of dealing with everything that is going on are quite different. I have been obsessed with watching the news and learning everything that I can about what is going on (without getting hysterical). For my partner, he has been keeping up on the news peripherally but generally going about his life.