Dealing with the ups and downs of any relationship can be like a rollercoaster ride, but when it comes to BPD love bombing, you might feel like you’re buckled in for the most intense ride without knowing when it’ll stop.
This behavior is known for its strong wave of love and attention—it can knock you off your feet in a confusing way. If you find yourself suddenly the star of someone’s world out of nowhere, chances are you’re experiencing this intense strategy.
Let’s look at the 8 signs that might mean you’ve been caught up in borderline love bombing, all while keeping things light-hearted and insightful.
Related: Is It Love Or A Trap? 10 Ominous And Warning Signs Of Love Bombing
What Is BPD Love Bombing?
BPD love bombing is like getting swamped by a huge wave of love that feels almost too good to be real. It happens when someone with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) overwhelms you with intense love, attention, and compliments right from the start.
They seem to want to speed up the relationship by making big moves and saying things you’d expect in an over-the-top romance movie. At first, it can seem really great, but this rapid-fire romance is often hiding bigger problems.
BPD love bombing isn’t just about the flood of love; it comes from the deep-seated fear of being left alone. To stop you from leaving, they might dive into this passionate phase of adoration, putting you on a pedestal as if they’ve met the perfect match.
On the other hand, if they feel even slightly rejected, they might switch to a defensive mode and start focusing on your flaws, and sometimes might even angrily lash out. This sudden shift between putting you on a pedestal and then knocking you down can make the relationship feel exciting but also totally confusing.
8 Glaring Signs Of BPD Love Bombing
1. You become the center of their universe almost overnight.
You’ve suddenly become the star of their world, and you don’t even understand how that happened; it feels flattering but a bit overwhelming too. That’s one of the major red flags of borderline love bombing.
Yesterday you were just another person in the crowd, but today, you’ve been put on a pedestal, being showered with intense admiration. It’s as if someone pressed fast-forward on your relationship; you’ve skipped past casual chats and landed straight in intense couple territory.
It feels great to be cherished, but this sort of intense affection is often more about them filling an empty space than a real bond.
2. You are complimented left, right and center.
All of a sudden, your inbox is full of sweet messages and compliments. Each message speaks about how amazing you really are; they say you’re witty, smart, gorgeous, and flawless. In their eyes, you’re capable of anything!
The nonstop flood of kind words can feel great, still, it’s like eating way too much candy: it’s intense, easy to get hooked on, and can’t last forever. They aren’t just trying to make you happy; their goal is to get you so used to their praise that leaving them doesn’t even cross your mind.
It’s a smart but overwhelming strategy to keep you close and calm their own fears of being left alone.
3. You are lavished with grand and extravagant gestures.
Loving someone with BPD means being on the other side of really, really grand gestures.
Imagine the type of big romantic moves you see in films. We’re talking next-level acts that make typical love stories seem juvenile. Think unexpected shows of affection, like midnight flower deliveries or jaw-dropping presents.
It’s almost as if every single day is your special day, with a relentless “go big or go home” vibe. Sure, these bold moves might knock you off your feet, but be wary—they’re often just shiny distractions shielding your eyes from real issues in your relationship or the unnaturally fast pace things are moving at.
Related: Loving Someone With Borderline Personality Disorder
4. They tell you how excited they are to have a future with you.
This is one of the biggest signs of BPD love bombing.
Get ready to hear about living together, taking the trip of a lifetime, or even getting married much sooner than you might think. They act as if they’re creating a fantasy world and you’re right there with them in this made-up story.
They talk about having a future together with so much certainty that you actually get caught up in their make-believe world. But this isn’t just simple daydreaming; it’s a deliberate tactic to strengthen the connection fast, which will make it tough for you to take a step back and look at things with a clear head later.
5. Their jealousy knows no bounds.
They get jealous very easily is a huge understatement; every little thing can send them into a jealous rage.
That casual chat you had with a close friend? Dissected. You made a harmless comment on someone’s social media post? Analyzed. These actions may seem like healthy possessiveness, but it really is about control and nothing else.
They aim to keep you on a tight rein and protect themselves from being deserted by you in the future. It feels like living in a closed room with no ventilation during summer; the more you try to get some air, the more they become irritated.
6. You feel like you are on an emotional rollercoaster 24×7.
Another major sign of borderline love bombing is this right here. One moment you were feeling like you were floating in the sky enjoying their love and affection, and the very next moment you are plunged into darkness, feeling confused and anxious, trying to keep up with their mood swings.
This doesn’t just feel emotionally draining, it can also make you feel disoriented not knowing what kind of relationship you’re in. It’s one of the most disturbing things about loving someone with BPD – the highest highs are followed by the lowest of lows.
Related: 4 Types Of Borderline Personality Disorder
7. They try to isolate you from your loved ones, without you even realizing it.
Before you know it, your world will gradually start shrinking until it’s just the two of you. They may criticize your friends, make plans that exclude anyone else or feel uncomfortable about your hobbies.
This process is very gradual, but after a point, you will start to realize that all your friends have become distant and alienated and your partner is the only source of emotional nourishment for you.
They isolate you not to ensure privacy, they do so so that they can have you all for themselves, and they are your primary focus.
8. You feel like you’re in a rapid relationship cycle.
Another major sign of BPD love bombing is that you feel like you’re moving too fast; one moment you were talking about having two toothbrushes in the bathroom, and the very next moment they’re talking about getting married and having kids.
This is a huge red flag when it comes to loving someone with BPD. A whirlwind romance doesn’t really allow you to build a genuine connection and understanding, instead it’s all about locking you in so that there’s no scope for you to change your mind.
It’s a hallmark of BPD love bombing, where the speed of the relationship’s progression is directly proportional to their fear of being alone.
Takeaway
BPD love bombing might seem like an exciting romance movie straight from Disney, but it is important to understand these signs as nothing more than coping mechanisms for a deeply ingrained sense of abandonment.
Loving someone with BPD requires you to understand this dynamic so that you can navigate these intense waters with empathy and awareness, ensuring a healthy relationship for both of you.
Related: The Temper Tantrums Of Borderline Personality Disorder
Have you ever been on the other side of borderline love bombing? Let us know your thoughts in the comments down below!
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