Asking Better Questions

Asking Better Questions

Have you ever known someone who tends not to ask direct questions or ask a question at all?

For instance, I have had a couple of people in my life who tend to make a statement rather than ask a question. They will say “I am hungry” or “I am thirsty” with the expectation that someone in the room will know this means “Would you please get me a drink” or “Would you please make me something to eat”. This tends to be a statement of expectation rather than a direct question.

I believe we tend to do the same thing in the way we think about things that we desire. We may say things like “I am tired of being poor” or “I am tired of being alone”, or “I don’t like the way people treat me” with the subtle intent that the universe will hear our statement and understand that we really are asking for something, be it happiness, wealth, health, love, respect, etc.

Why do we not ask directly for what we desire? Could it be we don’t ask directly because we do not feel worthy? Could it be more than that, could it be we don’t ask because the question can only be answered in by whom we don’t want to hear the answer?

The entity who must answer these questions is the one who asks the question in the first place. We are the only one who has the solution to what it takes to be happy, wealthier, loved, respected, etc.

It is only the person who is asking the question who possesses the answer! If I am to ask “how do I bring more happiness (or anything else into my life) the answer can only come from me! I cannot expect the answer to come from some external source. Matter of fact any answer I get from an external source even if it is correct will usually lead to more personal frustration.

The reason an external answer leads to frustration is that we are not ready for the answer we are given even if it is the most correct answer. When we are ready to hear the answer to our question the answer will come to us from within!

If we receive and accept the answer from outside of us we are not spiritually aligned to receive the answer and if we try to incorporate the external answer without being aligned we will be out of alignment and that which should give us joy will manifest into frustration.

When we ask better questions we get better answers. When we ask the questions of the right person then we get better answers yet. I am reminded of the adage “Don’t ask the question if you are not prepared for the answer”.

If we are to ask the question we must first prepare ourselves to be ready for the answer because often the answer may not be the one we initially believe we want to hear.

Often times the answers to our deepest questions may not fit our perception of our current self. This could be due to us not truly being our self. When we turn within and know our authentic self the answers will seem so obvious and seem like a natural fit. When we find our self at odds with our internal answer it is very likely that our perception of our self is a misperception being driven by years of conditioning by our ego-mind which has accepted the many “I am (s)” that we have accepted because of our perception and the perception of others.

It is important that we consider the questions we think we ask. Are we asking good questions or are we assuming the universe will know what we want by our statements? Are we asking the question of ourselves or are we seeking the answers externally? Are we ready for the answers?

Do you have the courage to ask better questions and do you have the courage to hear and employ the answers that come from your spirit? Remember to ask yourself questions is to build a relationship with yourself that is fueled by love!

-By Alex Wise

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Asking Better Questions


I started blogging in the summer of 2008 as a way to have an alternative outlet for my creativity. My writing career was at a standstill and I was dying for an audience (any writer who tells you they don’t want an audience is lying). Friends had been suggesting, for years, that I write about dating. I’ve always been a prolific dater and had plenty of dating stories to share, so I went with it. And blogging seemed like a great way to find an audience. I am also a co-founder of Loveawake dating siteView Author posts