Unintentionally you might be making relationship mistakes which is putting your relationship in jeopardy.
Love isn’t enough if you are experiencing a disconnection in your relationship. Love is easy.
But that doesn’t mean that your relationship is healthy or meant to last. How do relationships fail?
No matter how much you love each other, your relationship won’t last if you do certain things that show a lack of understanding between you and your partner.
6 relationship mistakes that will break you apart, no matter how much you love each other:
1. You don’t respect, support, honor, or share each other’s core values.
Your values are the baseline for who you are, whether they focused on family, curiosity, self-improvement, balance, compassion, drive, giving back — whatever is most important to you.
If your partner cannot respect and honor those in you and he doesn’t respect and honor you; if he resents you for who you are, the time that you dedicate to your values, verbal and physical expression of those values, then they are not for you and vice versa.
If your partner is about free-flowing and you like rules and structure, are you still able to respect each other and honor each other and your differences? If your partner is about being in the moment and you feel safe and secure by considering the future — in spending choices and indulgences — can you find balance in those two opposite believe systems?
If you cannot respect, honor, understand, integrate, or share values, you will find that you are constantly and consistently going up against each other’s values. They will be the source of your arguments, anger, and the eventual cause of your end.
2. You don’t respect, support, honor, or share each other’s lifestyle.
Lifestyle is extremely important, if not an essential element in a relationship. That being said, just because you have different lifestyles, does not mean that you can’t find a balance together. But it is essential to consider when it comes to things like religion, parenting styles, finances, social preferences, and communication.
Do you have very different priorities and expectations of yourself, life, and each other?
If you differ and are on opposite ends of the spectrum in these areas, you have to be realistic as to if you are a fit long term.
While it might be fine and even fun to be with your opposite, for now, does it have enduring potential?
3. You don’t communicate with each other on the same level.
Every individual creates a perspective and style based on past experiences, pain, insecurities, screw-ups, and lessons learned.
There are many different ways and styles of communication, but if you and your partner do not match up and cannot come to a place of understanding, then it’s like you’re speaking very different languages.
You may even be saying the same thing, yet you continue to argue because it is being expressed differently. How you communicate your needs, feelings, fears, excitement, and love must be heard by your partner.
If it is not heard and if you don’t feel heard, then you will feel alone, disrespected, slighted, and unimportant, even if your partner feels the exact opposite of the feelings that they are unintentionally instilling in you.
4. You view each other’s feelings as criticism.
When you voice your feelings, when you feel afraid, unhappy, confused, unfulfilled, or like your essential relationship needs are not being met, does your partner hear your feelings as criticism?
Are they constantly defensive when you speak your mind?
Do they make you feel like your feelings are ridiculous?
Do they minimize and marginalize what you are saying?
If that is the case, try couples counseling because the issue might be your differing communication styles. You might also have completely different opinions and priorities. And it is extremely difficult to have a relationship on that foundation.
5. You both have different time frames and partnership expectations.
If you want to get married within a year and a half and get knocked up within 2 years, you need to have a conversation with your partner about it. If you have different life expectations and your life desires are more important than your relationship, you have to talk about.