One of the reasons that you probably had a hard time leaving your married man was because you were afraid of what’s next. You were scared of being alone, that you would never love or be loved again, of the pain and the loss and the loneliness.
Your guy is in the exact same place, scared as hell. Only his is worse. You are, most likely, the only thing in his life that really makes him happy. The idea of losing you scares the shit out of him.
For you, your future is certain. You are not in a marriage that you can’t leave. You aren’t scared about breaking your family apart. You aren’t worried about your finances. For you, once your married man lets you move on, the sky is the limit.
You can put yourself out there and meet new people, you can excel at your job, you can start to build a life for yourself that might include marriage, family, and healthy finances. But with you gone, your guy has none of that. All he has is you longer being in his life. And that’s scary as hell.
5. He wants it all.
One of the main reasons why your married man won’t let you move on is because he has it all and he doesn’t want to let go of it. I mean, who would?
As I talked about earlier, your man has somebody who can support him, he has somebody who will have sex with him, he has somebody who he believes to be his savior in the world. And he has his family. He has a wife who is his partner. He has kids he gets to see every day. He has a house that is comfortable and active social life.
He literally is having his cake and eating it too. Who wouldn’t want to let go of that?
Ironically, this is exactly the reason why you need to let him go. During your affair, you have most likely put your life on hold for him while he has been able to live a full life because you were there, supporting him.
He had you to give him sex and love and he had his family and his finances intact. He has never left his wife because he had it all and letting go of you means that he’s just left with what he started with, unhappiness.
Knowing why your married man won’t let you move on might be just the thing that you need to help you make the final cut and start living your life again.
When I broke up with my guy the final time, after blocking him everywhere so that he couldn’t contact me, I made this list of the 5 things above and kept it on my fridge.
With that list, I could remember why my married man wouldn’t let me move on. And my list made it quite clear – NONE of the reasons that he wouldn’t let me go had ANYTHING to do with me or my feelings, only what he wanted and needed.
You can do this.
You can let go of your married man. And what I can promise you is that, if you do, you will be way happier than he will be in the long run.
Written By: Mitzi Bockmann
Originally Published On: Let Your Dreams Begin