The 7 Deadly Relationship Sins

 / 

, ,
Relationship

Every relationship goes through ups and downs, and it’s normal to have disagreements with your partner. But there are certain relationship mistakes that should be avoided at all costs, otherwise, your relationship will be over before you know it.

Not all flaws in a relationship are created equal – some things are easier to surmount than others. In fact, there are a handful of particular flaws – the Seven Deadly Sins of a Relationship – that are especially lethal.

7 Deadly Relationship Sins

1. Sin One: Jealousy

The green-eyed monster is perhaps never more present than in a relationship. When you love someone, you want them to love you back and when you fear they don’t, envy rears its ugly head. Naturally, drama ensues.

If you are jealous of your boyfriend’s co-worker, you will do things like check his email or show up at his work under false pretenses (“I just wanted to bring by this pencil in case you run out!”).

In your mind, there’s nothing wrong with this. If you find proof that he and his coworker are flirting (or worse), your suspicions are validated. If you find no proof, your insecurity is lessened.

But he sees your actions very differently.

To him, your jealously is proof that you don’t trust him or respect his privacy. It also leaves him wondering when your paranoia will stop and assuming, probably quite accurately, that it won’t.

Related: 6 Mistakes That Can Kill A Great Relationship

2. Sin Two: Judgment

A relationship is no place for judgment, and continually focusing on the flaws of another will leave them walking out the door rather than into your arms. This is true, even if your heart’s in the right place.

You may want to improve your boyfriend and mold him into the “perfect man”. But that’s not your job. Your job is to love him for who he is. Any attempt to change him will do much more harm than good.

He’ll wonder why this relationship is making him feel so bad like he’s not ever enough for you. He’ll wonder why you’re even with him. And he’ll wonder if there’s someone who will accept him, “bad” traits and all.

relationship sins

3. Sin Three: Neediness

It’s pretty easy to tell whether or not you’re needy. Do you pout when your boyfriend goes out without you? Do you expect him to consistently put you before his career? Do you sulk when he disagrees with you?

Doing all of this – or any of it – will leave him thinking of you in terms of a child rather than a girlfriend. He’ll grow exhausted and frustrated until he decides he’s ready for a grown-up relationship and not a girlfriend who needs to be babysat.

4. Sin Four: Selfishness

Putting yourself first every once in a while isn’t a bad thing, but putting yourself first all of the time is extremely damaging. If you’re a “my way or the highway” sort; if you ignore your boyfriend’s interests; if you expect him to do you favors but never do them for him; if you’d rather gaze into a mirror than your partner’s eyes, then you have a problem.

Selfishness turns a relationship into a one-way street, which will only ever lead to a dead end.

Related: 8 Little Known Mistakes That Can Wreck Your Relationship

5. Sin Five: Cheating

Perhaps the most deadly of all the sins, cheating on your boyfriend can take a variety of forms. It can range from actually sleeping with another, to simply flirting with someone (or even engaging in an emotional affair online). But all of it is damaging.

If your boyfriend finds out you’ve been unfaithful, he’ll label you as an untrustworthy, hurtful, potentially STD-ridden liar. He’ll also believe in the old adage – once a cheater, always a cheater.

6. Sin Six: Being Distant

You may have a sense of mystery to you, and that in small doses can be a good thing. But mystery and overt distance are very different. It’s not that you need to be an open book, pouring your heart out every chance you get, but ignoring your boyfriend and never telling him how you feel is the type of relationship that thrives in seventh grade, not adulthood.

Too much mystery will also leave your boyfriend feeling as though he’s not in a real union – he’ll assume you’re no longer attracted to him or interested in him. And guess what’s next? He’ll go searching for someone who is.

The 7 Deadly Relationship Sins

7. Sin Seven: Control

Boyfriends aren’t junkyard dogs – they don’t need to be controlled. Telling him where he can go; changing his words to fit your agenda; demanding that he puts you above his friends and family (at all times), and guilt-tripping him when you don’t get your way are all forms of emotional abuse.

The way this will make him feel is the same way you would feel if the shoe was on the other foot – it’ll make him feel suffocated and disrespected; it’ll make him feel like you’re the boss and he’s the employee; and it’ll make him feel – correctly – that your relationship is so unhealthy it’s only a matter of time until it limps off and dies.

Related: 8 Mistakes A Woman Must Not Make In A Relationship

If you’d like a guide to help navigate the murky waters of the dating world, tune into our webinar: The Three Keys to Being Relationship Ready—How to Attract and Keep A High-Quality Man. This webinar will teach you how to notice if you’re powerless around men, distinguish subconscious roles that a lot of women fall into, and reorient yourself so you can rewrite your love story. Click this link to find a time that works for you.

Clayton Olson is an International Relationship Coach, Master NLP Practitioner, and Facilitator. He delivers private virtual coaching sessions and leads online group workshops. Register for his free webinar that reveals the 3 Keys to Attracting and Keeping a High-Quality Man or grab his free guide 5 Secrets To Create A Rock Solid Relationship.  


Written By Clayton Olson
Originally Appeared On Clayton Olson Coaching 
Republished here with permission. 
Deadly Relationship Pin
Relationship Pin

— Share —

— About the Author —

Clayton Olson

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Up Next

What Men Look For In A Partner According To Science

What Men Look For In A Partner Science

Men aren't that hard to please. Experiments and research have figured out what men look for in a partner. Take a look at the top ten things below.

Have you ever wondered why some women easily attract men more than others? While charm and attitude are vital, it isn’t everything.

For men, looking for a partner is one of their most critical decisions. They naturally put A LOT of effort into this thought.

After all, men are not only looking for a person who looks good but can also support them, share their joy, and ride the rollercoaster of life with them.

Nowadays, the secret to making a guy wants you to be his partner is promised in every magazine, blog, or podcast.

But what


READ FULL ARTICLE ⇲
Up Next

Cookie Jarring, The Latest Dating Trend: 8 Signs You Are A Victim

Major Warning Signs Of Cookie Jarring

Modern dating is as it is so very tricky to navigate, with all sorts of toxic trends being there and all, like ghosting, breadcrumbing, pocketing, etc. Now there's another toxic dating trend that is, unfortunately, gaining a lot of popularity these days, known as cookie jarring.

Even though the term sounds a bit funny, the practice is really not. Being cookie jarred and dealing with cookie jarring is one of the most difficult and emotionally painful experiences there is. Before we dive deep into the signs of cookie jarring, it's important to know what does cookie jarring mean.

Related: Whe


READ FULL ARTICLE ⇲
Up Next

10 Signs Your Boyfriend Is Immature And A Man-Child

boyfriend is immature

Are you dating an idiot? Have you ever wondered if your boyfriend is immature? Do you keep rolling your eyes and face-palming when out on a date? Read along to know about the signs of an immature boyfriend.

Love is so stupid

While I personally do not like using the word “idiot”, sometimes some men act so childishly, you just can’t help but wonder “Why is he such an idiot?” Although most of us tend to act a bit silly at times, dating an immature man-child can really test your patience and become somewhat annoying. 

However, it doesn’t necessarily mean that you can’t have a healthy, lasting relationship with your “idiot” boyfriend. After all, we all become a little stupid in love. 


READ FULL ARTICLE ⇲
Up Next

Appreciate Your Partner: 65 Romantic Ideas To Make Your Partner Feel Special On A Daily Basis

Small ways appreciate your partner in life

Do you take your partner for granted? Or do you actively take the effort to make them feel appreciated on a daily basis. Relationships need constant nurturing and this is why you need to appreciate your partner in simple daily moments, when they least expect it. Because love is in the little things.

Most of us often make the mistake of taking our partner for granted as life keeps pulling us in different directions. With our goals, responsibilities, career prospects and family obligations, we often forget to appreciate what matters the most - our relationships.

This is why, appreciating your partner is a crucial step towards building a happy relationship. Instead of making grand romantic gestures to appreciate your spouse, yo


READ FULL ARTICLE ⇲
Up Next

How To Deal With The Baggage In Your Relationship: The One Best Way

How Deal With Baggage In Your Relationship

Dealing with baggage in your relationship is one of the best things you can do for yourself and for your partner. Working on healing your emotional wounds instead of expecting your partner to carry them forever can be really healthy and empowering.

I love musicals, and one line that I used to love was from RENT: “I’m looking for baggage that goes with mine.” I always found this tender admission to be somewhat romantic, a clever metaphor for compatibility in a relationship, but now I think it’s nonsense.

I mean, have you ever gone traveling and you’re standing at the baggage claim and you see someone grab a suitcase, struggle to pull it off the carousel, look at the nametag, and then realize it’s not theirs? And then they get flustered and embarrassed and quickly and awkwardly put the suitcase back on the carousel and h


READ FULL ARTICLE ⇲