This ongoing pandemic has truly changed the world and how humans live. For some of us, we are getting to spend more time with our families and doing everything we have always wanted to do, but couldn’t due to hectic lifestyles. That’s an amazing thing, isn’t it? But for some, this pandemic has made their lives a living hell. Victims of domestic violence are going through a terrifying time, as they are stuck at home with their abusers, with nowhere to hide.
Calls to domestic violence helplines are skyrocketing with helpline numbers and the police receiving calls about abuse every 20 minutes. Unimaginable, isn’t it? Leaving an abusive relationship might seem easy, but more often than not, it’s one of the most difficult things a victim can do. It’s not that simple, as there is still a huge risk to their lives.
Abusers don’t let their victims leave that easily. How many times have we read headlines like “Abusive Ex-Husband Fatally Shoots Ex-Wife For Leaving Him.”? So, no. Asking ‘why didn’t she just leave?’ is dangerously ignorant. It’s not as simple as people perceive it to be.
But that does not mean you have to be stuck in that situation forever. As long as you plan everything immaculately, there is a high chance that you will be able to save yourself from this.
What Is Domestic Violence?
Domestic violence is a kind of abuse, where there is a regular pattern of controlling, demeaning, coercive, dangerous, and violent behavior towards someone, with the motive of scaring that person, and keeping them ‘in check’. This might include emotional abuse, physical abuse, and even in some cases, sexual abuse, and is generally done by a spouse, partner, or family member.
What Are The Different Kinds Of Domestic Violence?
Domestic abuse or domestic violence can include different kinds of abuse, and they are as follows:
1. Emotional abuse
- Holding you responsible for all the problems in the relationship.
- Having a constant bad mood, and an effort to pressurise you into doing their bidding.
- Threatening to commit suicide, and emotionally blackmailing you.
- Comparing you with others to put you down and chip away at your dignity and self-esteem.
2. Psychological abuse
- Instilling fear, such as threatening you with dire consequences, driving dangerously, having weapons etc.
- Hurting your pets, and sometimes even killing them in front of you.
- Constantly telling you that nobody, including your family, and the police will believe that you are being abused.
- Wrecking your things, and trying to destroy your property.
3. Verbal abuse
- Using dirty and horrible swear words for you in public, in order to humiliate you.
- Screaming and shouting at you, and constantly subjecting you to name-calling tactics.
- Mocking your beliefs, ethnicity, body image and career.
- Repeatedly attacking your abilities as a parent, and constantly putting you down in front of everyone, including your family, friends and children.
4. Sexual abuse
- Assaulting and hurting your private parts.
- Forcing you to get intimate with them, despite pleading that you don’t want to, and refusing to use any protection while getting intimate.
- Pressuring you to do things you are not comfortable doing (taking explicit photos, performing demeaning sexual acts).
- Throwing sexually demeaning criticisms and insults at you.
5. Physical abuse
- Directly assaulting you (slapping, kicking, punching, pulling your hair, biting, choking, pushing, burning, eye injuries, shaking).
- Not allowing you to sleep, eat, take your medications or even go for medical care if needed.
- Beating you up with objects, used as weapons.
- Locking you in a room or in the house, and taking away the keys.
6. Financial abuse
- Not letting you have a job of your own, as a way of limiting your financial independence.
- Not letting you access your bank accounts.
- If you do have a job, they use your entire salary to pay for their own personal needs and look after ‘household expenses’.
- Forcing you to make false declarations, and making you sign documents that will further limit your financial independence.