Relationships are hard work sometimes, and there are a few red flags that you should watch out for if you don’t want to get your heart shattered.
Are you wondering if your relationship is too good to be true?
Are you the kind of person who often finds themselves in super intense relationships, ones where it feels like the sky is the limit and that you will be happy forever, only to find yourself left broken-hearted and alone?
Have you been left by someone who is overwhelmed by your behavior or have you left someone you loved because your relationship isn’t meeting your needs?
Ironically, sometimes relationships that are the most intense are the ones that leave us most open to the risk of being hurt. And the relationships that are intense are the ones that are hardest to resist because the passion is so compelling.
Luckily, there are ways to identify people who might seem to be THE one but who might be a risky choice for a long-term relationship.
Below are some red flags that are easy to spot. Knowing them will help you make conscious choices.
1. They are impulsive.
People who are impulsive are people who act on their gut. Their mind usually ignores what logic is screaming at them and they do what they want when they want to.
An impulsive person might look at you across the room, decide that you are the one for them and make you fall madly in love with them. An impulsive person could introduce you to their kids and parents after knowing you for just a week. An impulsive person could whisk you away on a romantic island vacation, promising that it will be the first of many.
And an impulsive person could see a person on the beach next to them on said romantic island and decide that that person is the one for them. And leave you.
Being with an impulsive person can be really fun. The living moment to moment, never knowing what is on the horizon and enjoying what comes when it does. The falling in love quickly and making mad love for days. It’s all very exciting and, most likely, very temporary.
So, watch out for someone who is impulsive. Look instead for someone who is more thoughtful and deliberate in their approach to love. Thoughtful and deliberate people can be passionate too and the passion might even last!
Are you looking for a meaningful relationship in your life? Read 5 Ways To Avoid Toxic Relationships and Find Meaningful Ones
2. They are WAY into sex.
At the beginning of a relationship, being with someone who is interested in lots of sex is exciting. The dopamine rush that occurs when wrapped around your person as they make you feel loved and wanted is intoxicating. As time goes on, the need for sex subsides somewhat, as you settle into a comfortable relationship.
Unfortunately, there are some people who need to have sex constantly. The reasons for this are varied but they are real. And, the person who needs constant sex is most usually the kind of person who will need to move on and find someone else to fill their needs. Or, even worse, they will stay with you and seek sex elsewhere anyway.
So, pay attention to your person at the beginning of your relationship. How do they feel about sex? Do they seem obsessed or do they need to do things that might be out of the ordinary? Do you find that you can’t always reach them and do you wonder if they might be with someone else?
If you are with this kind of person and are trying to make a relationship out of it, you are taking a big risk. Know that your person most likely won’t be able to change their ways and your heart will be at risk of being shattered.
3. They are self-centered.
We have all been in relationships with people who are self-centered. We have all been in relationships with people who care so much about themselves but, in the beginning, it appears that they are all about you.
People who are self-centered believe that the world revolves around them and, while they seem to do things for your pleasure, they are really doing it for their own.