6. They are supportive of your personal goals
“A great marriage is not when the perfect couple comes together. It is when an imperfect couple learns to enjoy their differences.” – Dave Meurer
You may share core values and life goals, but you’re still individuals with personal goals that reflect each of your unique gifts and priorities.
Someone who believes in you shows up in subtle ways, not just for paychecks or award ceremonies, and they make no room for jealousy or competitiveness in your relationship. This means they will be willing to do things like taking on extra responsibilities on the home front so you can chair an important charity event, keep the coffee pot full when you’re working late, and tell you how much they admire and believe in you.
All of these are green lights that someone could be the one and is ready to get married.
7. They have a healthy sense of humor
“Marriage, ultimately, is the practice of becoming passionate friends.” – Harville Hendrix
Laughter is important in marriage. So much so that, as American essayist Agnes Repplier wrote, “We cannot really love anybody with whom we never laugh.”
What’s important to look for isn’t a “hardy-har-har” jokester, but someone who is able to laugh at themselves and not take life too seriously. Someone who doesn’t make fun of others but can laugh at their own absurdities and mistakes is a great catch. They have a strong enough sense of self to be comfortable in humility — and that kind of healthy humor is contagious.
8. They make you want to be a better person — and vice versa
“A great marriage isn’t something that just happens; it’s something that must be created.” – Fawn Weaver
OK, not just to borrow from Jack Nicholson’s famous line in “As Good As It Gets”, but there is a lot of truth to the importance of this.
Someone who will be in your life on a temporary basis may make you want to look your best or be on your best behavior when you’re together, but someone who is marriage material will inspire you to become the best version of yourself period. You will share a magical dance of mutual inspiration, each of you cheering on the aspirations and highest good of the other.
Dating for marriage-minded people doesn’t have to be stressful; it just has to be mindful and purposeful. You are, after all, preparing to commit your whole self to one person for a lifetime.
One thing that stands out with people who are marriage-minded is their self-accountability. They realize that they have to know themselves well, and they know they have to create in themselves a gift to bring any potential life partner.
Dating someone who is marriage material will result in more than the butterflies of infatuation. The experience will make you feel at home with yourself. It will give you a stable footing on which you can reach for even more of who you can be. When that happens, the whole couple really will be greater than the sum of its individual parts.
Written by Amy Schoen Originally Published on Yourtango