3 Truths About LOVE Every Couple Should Know

 / 

,
Truths About Love Every Couple Know

Love is not always an easy terrain to navigate; if a couple doesn’t know what they are doing, or what they are supposed to do, then chances are they will crash and burn. In order to feel the beauty of love in it’s truest glory, there are a few truths about love that every couple should know.

I hear people say all the time…

I love my husband/wife but I’m not “In Love” with him/her.

I’m just not sure if I love them anymore.

I love them but he/she said I don’t love you anymore, is my love enough?

This kind of statement can be extremely confusing not to mention painful and disheartening.

So I wanted to share a few truths I have come to know about love after helping hundreds of individuals and couples get through various crises points and difficult times to have a more loving, happy, and rewarding marriage.

Here Are 3 Truths About LOVE Every Couple Should Know

1. LOVE is an ACTION, not a feeling you get from another person.

Love is an experience you receive as a result of doing loving acts for someone you care about. Not what you get.

You “make love” in the marriage, you build it through acts that show love. The trick is to give the love and take the action your spouse needs and wants. The problem is we often go about satisfying our partner’s needs with what matters to us. When we do that, we neglect the opportunity to create a deeper connection and more happiness.

Therefore it’s not rocket science or tricky to fall back “in love”. It’s about looking after your partner’s deepest needs and in doing so showing them how much you care.  

Related: 9 Differences Between True Love And Emotional Dependency

2. LOVE is not something you find, it’s something you CREATE.

The majority of us falsely assume from love stories in tabloids and movies that all you need to do is find that special someone and that’s it, you will live happily ever after. We all know that’s not true, yet on some level we often expect it.

When people say to me in couples’ therapy that they don’t feel love or they are not “in love” I ask them what actions they have taken to demonstrate their love for their spouse and often they can’t answer. The reason people often don’t feel “in love” is because they’re not doing anything… they are waiting for love to come and motivate them first and…only then they will act.

So they hit a stalemate, get caught in a trap, where they stay stuck in a love-deprived relationship for days, months, or years. Waiting for something to change, yet no one is willing to give. In the end, they blame the break-down of the marriage on communication, lack of sex, family, or financial differences, yet in reality without any loving acts… how can a couple stay connected?

The real problem is that the marriage is starved of loving selfless gestures.

If you think about it, there is absolutely nothing in life that is worth having that does not require any effort to both achieve and then maintain. Things in life either grow or they die, it’s the law of nature. Relationships are no different they need to be nurtured, paid attention to, cared for, and tended to.

If you want to feel more love or fall back “in love” you need to make acts of love part of your daily routine. The more you do, the better, and the more your lover is likely to reciprocate. What do you want to experience more of right now in your relationship, more excitement, affection, attention, appreciation, fun, support, care, security? It’s all possible to create.

3. Unconditional love is extremely rare, don’t expect it.

If someone ignores, hurts, or annoys you, it’s unrealistic for them to expect you to always love them. Similarly, if you act out towards your spouse, again and again, they are likely to change the way they think, act, and feel towards you. So don’t expect unconditional love to be there. Don’t take your spouse for granted. Make an effort to make them smile, show empathy and kindness.

Love is a deeply personal and individual thing, it can mean something entirely different you to than what it does to me. Here is my perspective on love.

Love in a relationship of misery is not helping the situation! So if you only have love with turmoil and pain, maybe it is not enough!

On the other hand, you have a great relationship but there is a concern that love isn’t what it used to be, maybe there is no reason to be concerned at all. As love can be built.

Related: 10 Things You Need to Accept To Find True Love

Other emotions we experience throughout our week can cause us to lose sight of the love we have. If we are feeling angry, stressed, annoyed, or upset about work, finances, family, or our health, it’s going to affect the happiness and love we feel for someone. So you need to make sure that you don’t over analyze in difficult times.

Hope this helps in some way. I’d love to hear your thoughts about love or read favorite quotes… email them to me or post them below.

From my heart to yours,

Nicola

Contact or find out more about me at www.nicolabeer.com

Marriage Transformation Specialist & Founder of Save My Marriage Program – an alternative to marriage counseling in Dubai, Abu Dhabi, and further afield online.

P.S. If you have fallen out of love, it’s easier than you think to fall back “in love”. Don’t get caught in the trap of waiting to feel love before you act. ACT now…do something loving, speak to a marriage specialist for support, or get free literature for guidance. You can download my 7 Secrets to Saving Your Marriage here for free.

“7 Secrets to Saving Your Marriage” FREE REPORT  https://training.nicolabeer.com/7-secrets-marriage/


Written by Nicola Beer
Originally appeared on SaveMyMarriageProgram.com

Is Love Enough 3 Truths About Romantic LOVE
3 Truths About LOVE Every Couple Should Know
Truths About Love Every Couple Know pin
Ads

— Share —

— About the Author —

Response

  1. Rene Limeres Avatar
    Rene Limeres

    Very well said, Nicola! I hope a lot of folks read it and take it to heart! Words of wisdom from an enlightened soul!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *



Up Next

Why Cameron Diaz Supports Separate Bedrooms For Couples: Is It Key To A Happier Marriage?

Separate Bedrooms For Couples: Strong Reasons Why

In a world where we are always sharing everything, Cameron Diaz has a fresh take on love: separate bedrooms for couples. Yes, you heard that right!

The actor has recently been in a conversation about how couples who sleep in separate beds are happier — and it’s got us questioning everything too.

Why Do We Need Separate Bedrooms For Couples?

You’re lying in bed, ready to drift off to sleep when you hear it… A chainsaw-like noise ringing through your ears. It’s your partner’s snoring — and it’s not the cute gentl



Up Next

What is Fatuous Love? 3 Key Factors Leading to Infatuation!

What is Fatuous Love? Key Factors Leading to Infatuation!

Have you ever felt that super strong crush where everything seems like a fairy tale? You know, the kind where you meet someone, feel a quick connection, and suddenly, it’s like you’ve found your perfect match.

According to experts, that is what is fatuous love all about!

It is like building a house on shaky ground. At first, what feels like love at first sight might not exactly be the case later. You dive in quickly without really taking the time to connect on a deeper level.

In this article, we’ll explore what fatuous love is all about. We’ll unravel the layers of this intense yet fleeting kind of love and understand why it might face some challenges along the way. 



Up Next

7 Qualities Of A Healthy Relationship

7 Qualities Of A Healthy Relationship: Foundations Of Love

In the world of connections, relationships are like cozy blankets made of feelings and shared moments. Just like caring for a garden, a good relationship needs attention to grow and make you happy. Think of it as a dance where two people move together smoothly, helped by a strong bridge of understanding. Let’s explore the 7 qualities of a healthy relationship.

In this discussion, we’ll explore the seven things that make a relationship strong and happy, like the simple notes in a beautiful tune of love and connection. So, are you ready to explore all the signs you are in a healthy relationship? Come on.

Related:



Up Next

Married To An Introverted Man? 9 Reasons They Make Exceptional Husbands

Married To An Introverted Man? reasons why it's a blessing

Are you married to an introverted man? Ever wondered about how he can be so unique and amazing as a husband? In a world that honors extroversion, it is crucial that we acknowledge the invaluable qualities that introverts offer in a marriage.

Today, we will explore some compelling reasons why introverts make great husbands and highlight some challenges that might arise in such marriages.

Whether you are an extrovert who wants to understand your quiet spouse better or if you are dating an introverted man, we are here to help you appreciate the joy of marrying an introverted man.

Do Introverts Make Good Husbands? 



Up Next

How To Date A Widower? Finding Love Again

Dating A Widower: Tips and the Red Flags You Can't Ignore!

Picking yourself up after losing a spouse is a traumatizing experience. Learning how to date a widower will allow you to provide a safe space for healing for the man you love and care for.  

If you’re thinking about dating a widower, it’s important to know how to handle things. It can be a tricky road to navigate, but can provide you with a loving and fulfilling relationship.

This article is here to help you out. We’ll give you some simple tips and advice that can make things easier for you.

How To Date A Widower? 

When it comes to dating a widower, it’s essential to approach the relationsh



Up Next

A List of High Standards in a Relationship: Non Negotiable Must-Haves You Shouldn’t Settle for

Big Standards: List of High Standards in a Relationship

When we talk about how we behave in relationships, we’re really talking about who we are deep down. Many people wonder what makes a good relationship tick, so we’ve put together a list of high standards in a relationship.

When pondering “what are standards in a relationship,” we are not referring to arbitrary rules but rather the essential principles that elevate your love to new heights. Stick with us as we go through what it takes to make a strong and healthy connection with someone special.

What are standards in a relationship?  

We each possess a unique threshold for behavior, traits, and values, below which we are unwilling to tolerate a partner. But here’s the fascinating paradox – while we all have these s



Up Next

Cold Feet Or Clear Signs? 8 Major Warning Signs You Are Marrying The Wrong Person

8 Warning Signs You Are Marrying The Wrong Person

Marriage is one of the most profound commitments one can make in a lifetime. The idea of spending the rest of your life with someone can be both exhilarating and terrifying. Most of us have a mental checklist of the qualities we want in our significant other, and often, we are vigilant for the obvious red flags: dishonesty, incompatibility, or a mismatch in values. But what about the more subtle signs you are marrying the wrong person? The uncommon warnings that lurk in the shadows, often overlooked?

It’s essential to pay attention to these because they can provide insight into potential pitfalls in the future. In your quest for lifelong happiness, it’s vital to ensure that you’re not just seeing what you want to see, but rather, you’re unders