Do you feel like the right kind of person is never attracted to you?
Quite some time has passed and you haven’t been able to find the right person you can make a lifelong commitment with. You seem to be attracting terrible, violent, clingy, or useless men or women who don’t share any of your passions and who never last very long.
It feels like all your efforts have gone to waste and all your prayers have gone unheard because you only get all the wrong people as partners.
If this applies to you, understand that there are many others just like you. Statistically speaking, a girl will go through at least four terrible dates and seven partners before she meets the one she will spend her life with. Boys will also go through four terrible dates and eight partners before meeting the people they are meant to be with.
Getting into the right relationship is difficult and even though there are eight billion people on this planet, only a minuscule number will be right for you. So how do you start the search? Is it really possible to zoom in on the right person?
1. Everyone is flawed in some way or the other
We might not like to hear it but we all have certain flaws that make us stand out from the rest. Don’t try to find some flawless idol when you’re looking for a partner. You might have a list of expectations but it will be impossible to find a person who ticks off all your points because that person will never be born. What you need is a partner whom you can love so much that their imperfections don’t seem like a big deal at all. You need to be able to take them as they are and love even the flawed bits of them because they make them who they are.
You will also need a partner who does the same for you and you will only get that kind of person when you start acknowledging your own imperfections and offering them acceptance.
Be comfortable with who you are at all times.
2. You get what you give and that is usually the thing you need
Did you go out with some nincompoop again? Unfortunately, your subconscious is pulling that person towards you because it is essential that you meet them so that you can put them in the past and look to the future. This is not easy to accept but you will only attract energy similar to the kind that radiates from you. We don’t always know what kind of energy we are giving out but it is easily discovered by examining what is going on in our heads. Unfortunately, we spend too much time obsessing over what we don’t wish to find and that is what we get.
If you are scared, doubting yourself, or beating yourself up for not being perfect, you will end up attracting terrible people. Hopefully, you will take this experience as a way to understand that you need to start valuing yourself.
3. We look for people similar to our parents
Professionals worldwide have agreed that we fall in love when we are unconsciously given something similar to the love our parents gave us as children. We keep looking for partners who are similar to our parents without even meaning.
This happens because deep down, we are looking for people who can fill up some of the holes that are left in us from when we were children. This isn’t some horrible mistake and it will actually help you understand why you have to go through all these people who are terrible for you before finding the right person.
People come into your life for a purpose and as you develop, some flames will naturally burn out or they will burn stronger and brighter. You have to go through all these experiences to know what it is that you really wish for and what it is that you really need.
4. You complete yourself
If you’re looking for your other half who will make you whole, you don’t have to look very far. Just take a peek at your own reflection and you will see that person because no one else can make you feel as whole as you yourself can.
A partner can only complement the person that you already are. The person who is perfect for you will only help you realize the potential that you already possess but at the same time, it will be difficult for you to realize your wholeness if you are with someone who is all wrong for you.
For a relationship to be strong and intense, the two people involved need to be sure of themselves. They need to feel complete even when they are completely alone because only then can they pour themselves, heart and soul, into that relationship and make each other as happy as can be.
5. Everything will happen at the right time
The universe knows what to do and when to do it. Don’t worry about ending up alone. That won’t happen unless and until you truly wish for it to happen. Don’t try to rigidly control every aspect of your life. Give up your desire for control and stop obsessing about needing to attract that right person. Let go of that need and just take life as it comes. Work on doing all the things that make you happy to be alive.
It is only when you work on yourself that you will be ready for that person when they come. It might even be that you have already met that person but you are just not at the right place yet. Don’t get impatient and annoyed because they will come when they are meant and it will probably be when you are not expecting it at all. Let the universe work its magic.
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