Love – Abuse – Love: It’s NOT Fun!
Abusive relationships are like a rollercoaster- being showered with love at one moment, being abused the next, then again, being showered by love. This constant cycle keeps on happening, and happens at such a fast pace, that you don’t even realize it. Despite the constant stress, both physical and emotional, you are put under due to this unholy cycle of abuse, you tend to stay in the relationship because somewhere you hope that it might get better after some time.
It is kind of like a drug. Your partner loves you unconditionally until they decide to inflict different forms of abuse. You are compelled by the myth that it was your fault. Then, you feel the urge to please your partner so that things could go back to the way they were. It becomes like an addiction to please your abuser so that things become normal once again.
Abusers damage your entire emotional well-being. Your feeling of self-worth becomes practically non-existent. Due to the constant abuse you go through and feeling like it is all your fault, you feel that you are incapable of being in a relationship. During these moments, the abusive partner comes to your rescue and shows you some love, and this results in you becoming more attached to the demon.
This clouds your judgement and allows them to fully take advantage of your vulnerability without you even doubting that they are doing something wrong, even for a second. They create a persona of being your ‘saviour’ in times when you are emotionally distressed because of the abuse they have inflicted upon you.
There’s no excuse for abuse – no matter how traumatic someone’s past might have been, or how dysfunctional of a family they came from. Past trauma and mental illness is not an excuse for abusing people and treating them badly.
In many cases, you believe that your partner is emotionally damaged due to some traumatic events in their past and that is the reason for their abusive behaviour. Most of the victims are good people at heart, and it is this innate desire to help others that pulls them towards abusive relationships. They genuinely believe that they can change their abuser and their life for good.
You want to stay back and help your partner overcome their trauma. You want to heal them. And throughout all this, your abuser is busy manipulating you into believing that it is only because of their traumatic past, do they behave with you badly, and they are actually good people at heart.
Walk Out Of The Darkness – You Deserve More.
It is very important to recognize the signs of abuse in a relationship so that you can protect yourself and get out of the relationship fast. Be aware of what constitutes love and how it is different from the way you or someone you know is being treated by their partners. Real love can never be violent and soul-crushing.
Escaping an abusive relationship is not easy due to all the manipulation and fear involved, but with the help of your loved ones and your own strong will, you can definitely do so. It might seem difficult initially, but once you take that one step of courage – it will be the best decision of your life!