Absence does make the heart grow fonder.
Nothing feels better than being told that someone we care about misses us when we’re apart. Whether it’s been 24 hours since your last date, or several weeks if you’re in a long-distance relationship, spending time apart can actually be good for things with your boo.
Not only does having time away from your boyfriend give you the opportunity to enjoy alone time or hang with your girlfriends, but it also gives you both time to reflect on the state of the relationship and appreciate that you’ve got a good thing going.
So let’s dive in and look at how to make him miss you and be chomping at the bit to see you again soon!
1. Be the Type of Woman He Would Actually Miss
Be pleasant to your man, and he’ll miss you.
Nancy and Peter always have a great time together. They crack each other up and have a language all their own. It’s clear that Peter enjoys spending time with Nancy.
On the other hand, Natasha and Boris bicker a lot when they’re together. Boris always prepares for Natasha’s nagging, because it feels like she’s always doing it. Spending time together is not a pleasure.
Guess which guy is going to miss his lady more when they’re apart?
Humans are actually very simple. Either we pursue pleasure or we avoid pain.
If, when he’s with you, he’s laughing, he enjoys your company, he’s connecting with you, and he gets compliments from you, he’s going to feel pleasure being with you, and he’s going to want more of that.
On the other hand, if your relationship is more like Boris and Natasha’s, all he’s hearing is you nagging for every little thing he does. The two of you might argue often, even though you care deeply for one another. Then all he’s going to feel is pain. This will not lead to him missing you. He may, in fact, choose to get away from you as often as he can!
The secret to how to make him miss you? Be an awesome girlfriend and partner. Greet him with a hug and a smile. Make him feel special. What man doesn’t love that?
If you have negative things to say, try holding them in. Or at least spread them out so your man doesn’t get hit by a barrage of criticism every time you’re together. Find constructive ways to bring up things that bother you, and you’ll be more likely to solve those issues than you would be by nagging him.
2. Give Him Some Space
He needs time away to miss you.
Now, this might sound a little cliché, but one common theme I’ve noticed in all relationships is that men usually want a little more space than women do. Men are very different from women, and that’s something you’ll have to accept.
If he needs a healthy amount of space, you’ve got to give it to him in order to let him miss you.
Encourage him to go out with his bros to play basketball or drink whiskey (sorry to say, studies show he prefers to hang with his bros than with you!). Don’t spend every night of the week at his house, even if he invites you. He — just like you — needs distance from you in order to feel closer to you.
Sounds funny, but it’s true.
And while you’re at it, assess your own need for space.
If you find that you never ever want space from him, it’s time for you to start finding your own space anyway. It’s not healthy for couples to spend all their time together. It can cause you to neglect your friends, family, and self. You can start to rely too much on this man (and, in my mind, you always need just a dose of independence for yourself) and lose your identity.
So even if you don’t want space for yourself, it’s good for you both, and it’s one of the easiest ways to make him miss you.
Find things that you can do instead of looking lovingly into his eyes all day. Create your own little space away from him. It could be as simple as reading every morning with your coffee, even if you two live together. Or taking a vacation on your own.