4 Sad Reasons Women Lose Their Soulmates


Sad Reasons Women Lose Soulmates

When it comes to a relationship, there are many reasons why women lose their soulmates. These reasons might not seem like a very big deal, but these can end up ruining their chances of building a future with their soulmates, and ultimately lose them.

When you first meet your soulmate — your true love, your one and only — breaking up or losing him is the last thing you want to think about.

But relationships are never cut and dry. There’s no manual on how to be a good girlfriend, and even the most attractive women run the risk of chasing their soulmate away.

My decision to become a love coach became an obvious choice when I went through the most devastating break up I’d ever experienced; I had to break up with someone I still loved.

When you meet someone who you believe is your “one true love,” your “soulmate,” and he doesn’t see you the same way, it’s heartbreaking.

One day soon after our breakup, as I was going over what went wrong in our relationship and questioning how it was possible that we weren’t going to be spending the rest of our lives together, I began to evaluate how I was being in our relationship.

What was my responsibility for why we didn’t work out? How was I showing up in our relationship? What decisions was I making based on what he was saying or doing?

When I asked these questions and allowed the answers to reveal themselves, so many different things began flooding my awareness.

As much as I hate to become aware of my negative aspects of myself, I had to acknowledge things I did and choices I made so I could become more conscious and make new choices in the future that were more aligned with my true self.

In turn, this allowed me to be more unconditionally loving and more authentically myself, so when I finally did meet my soulmate, I was ready for him.

If you want to know how to be a good girlfriend and avoid breaking up with someone you love, here are 4 mistakes that I now know I made that cost me my soulmate, that you might be doing, too.

Here Are 4 Sad Reasons Women Lose Their Soulmates

1. Manipulating him.

Everything that I did in our relationship was first and foremost because I deeply loved him. But I also had the thought that whatever I did for him would be so fabulous that he’d love me so much he’d never want to leave.

Just before our first Christmas together, he was going out of town and wouldn’t have time to decorate his house and wrap his kids’ presents. So, I said I’d come over and help him.

Of course, that’s something I would do just because I was his girlfriend, but I had this underlying thought of, “When I do this, he’s going to think I’m the best girlfriend in the world and will never let me go.”

Having the energy of “If I do this, then…” is manipulation energy. Even though he wasn’t consciously aware that I was having these thoughts, energetically he could feel it. Any energy that isn’t purely loving energy can be felt by others.

I don’t like feeling manipulated by others, so imagine how he felt. And pretty much everything that I did for him had this energy attached to it. Now, when I become aware of the energy that isn’t pure loving energy, I check myself.

I call myself out and ask, “What would it take to make this choice from my pure loving energy?” and then I find myself shifting into my pure loving energy.

Related: 11 Soulmate Signs He’s Not The One (and how to find the one for real)

2. Not trusting him.

I was so in love with him that it scared me. I was deathly afraid of him leaving. I would keep my mouth shut if he did or said something that I didn’t agree with so my soulmate wouldn’t just abandon me.

I made sure that everything that I said or did was “perfect” so he wouldn’t leave, and in doing so, I wasn’t able to be fully myself with him. I realized that I didn’t trust him to stay; that I didn’t trust myself to be worthy enough of him.

I forgot that the universe (or higher power) had my back. I forgot that I am worthy of his, and any man’s, love. And I missed out on truly being present and enjoying the relationship because I was so scared of it ending.

Now, I’m trusting that who I am is enough. I also trust that whatever happens, it’s always for my highest and best good, and his as well.

3. Making it too easy.

Because I loved him so much and because I never wanted him to leave me, I felt like I needed to prove myself to him. Whatever he needed, I was there supporting him. When he asked to see me, I’d rearrange my schedule for him.

My priority became him over the dance class I really enjoyed taking or spending time with friends.

Plus, the more things I did for him to prove to him how wonderful I was, the more he started relating to me like his mother, who doted on him whenever she was in town.

Now, I work to find compromises. I am no longer willing to sacrifice doing things that bring me joy for someone else. I also no longer feel the need to prove myself to anyone, especially a man, in order for them to love me.

Related: 6 Things That Happen When You Have To Let Go Of Your Soulmate

4. Expecting too much.

Once we became serious, I began having unrealistic expectations of him to love me and fulfill my needs so that I could feel good about myself and my life.

I needed him to prove he loved me, and I would get really upset if he didn’t.

When we first started dating, he came over for dinner. On his way to my apartment, he met a neighbor of mine. They chatted for a bit and then he knocked on my door.

When he told me that he had met my neighbor, I was more concerned about whether he introduced himself as my boyfriend or not. I really didn’t care about what else they discussed.

I even asked my neighbor the next time I saw him if Luke had really introduced himself as my boyfriend. I needed him to say certain things or do certain things so that I could feel more at ease.

I felt like if he did these things, then he really did care about me. And if he didn’t, then he didn’t really care about me.

Immediately after we broke up, I realized that I didn’t like the way that I was choosing to show up in the relationship.

I realized that I didn’t blame him for not wanting to be with me. If a guy that I was seeing was doing all of these things to me, I’d end it, too!

So, I began diving more deeply into understanding how the Law of Attraction works, and anything else that could support me in healing my break up and myself. It was also during this time that I decided to become a love coach so I could help others not show up in this way either, and risk losing their soulmates, as I had, and forfeiting chances at true love.

Related: If They Are Failing To Feed Your Soul In These 6 Ways They Aren’t Your Soulmate

Because I’ve learned how to value myself, love myself, and know that I’m worthy of love, I show up in my relationships completely like myself. I know that being completely myself is good enough and worthy of all that I desire! And now I teach others to know the same things about themselves.

I am an internationally-known dating coach, professional speaker, workshop leader, and author of The One Simple Secret to Attracting Your Soulmate Now. To learn more about healing your past, loving yourself more, or for a free Become Your Soulmate’s Soulmate Strategy Session, click here.

Written by Kelly Ann Garnett
Originally published on YourTango
4 Reasons Women Lose Their Soulmates Mistakes You Too Might Be Doing
4 Sad Reasons Women Lose Their Soulmates
Sad Reasons Women Lose Soulmates pin

— Share —

— About the Author —

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Up Next

The 3 Most Common Types Of Cheaters: Uncovering The Love Fraudsters

Most Common Types Of Cheaters: The Silent Echoes Of Deceit

In every love story, the sweet haze of romance often hides some unsettling figures lurking in the shadows—figures of deceit that can turn sweet stories bitter. When it comes to infidelity and cheating, you might be a bit surprised to know that there are different types of cheaters, mainly 3 types of cheaters.

Revealing these types of cheaters might bring out uncomfortable truths, but they’re important for understanding the complex world of human emotions. Through their different ways of dishonesty, they show the complicated and tangled nature of cheating. Each one represents a warning about the rough patches that love can sometimes

Up Next

How To Deal With A Jealous Partner

How To Deal With A Jealous Partner: Practical Tips

Jealousy is a normal part of any romantic relationship and to some extent it can even be healthy. But when your partner becomes excessively jealous it can turn toxic. Let’s explore how to deal with a jealous partner and build a healthier relationship. 

Love and jealousy

It’s a tale as old as time – two individuals come together, in love and hopeful for the future, only for one person to find themselves troubled by the other’s past relationships or experiences. 

If this rings true for you, you’re dealing with what’s termed as “retroactive jealousy“. It can be painful, destructive, and truly challenging, especially if

Up Next

Codependency or Love? 8 Signs Of Enmeshment In Romantic Relationships

Eight Signs Of Enmeshment In Romantic Relationships

Ever felt like you’re too close in your relationship? When two become one, where’s the “me” in the “we”? Welcome to the world of enmeshment in romantic relationships. It’s where deep love can sometimes feel like a tight squeeze. So, are you in a cosy embrace or a restrictive hold?

Join us as we shed light on these blurred boundaries and help you find your footing. It’s all about striking the right balance: being close yet maintaining your own space.

Ready to dive deeper into understanding enmeshment in romantic relationships and balancing your love connection? Let’s get started.

Up Next

Dating Someone With Relationship OCD? 7 Strategies For Supporting Your Loved One

Dating Someone With Relationship OCD? Seven Essential Insights

Relationships are built on trust, understanding, and commitment. These are the pillars that hold a relationship steady, even when storms come. And just like any challenge in life, some storms are tougher than others. One such challenge is when you are dating someone with Relationship OCD (Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder). 

This condition can bring unique difficulties, but with knowledge and patience, you can meet these challenges head-on. When you are dating someone with OCD and anxiety, both of you must make an effort to understand this disorder.

When both of you are informed, you can navigate the challe

Up Next

What Is A Summer Fling? 20 Tips On How To Have A Summer Fling

What Is A Summer Fling? Twenty Strategies To Have A Summer Fling

Warm breezes, sandy beaches, and a whirlwind romance that lasts just a season – ever wondered what is a summer fling? Dive in as we unravel this sun-kissed mystery and give you the ultimate guide on how to have a summer fling.

What Is a Summer Fling? 

The quintessential charm of summer lies in its fleeting nature, much like the brief but passionate encounters we often refer to as “summer flings”. What is a summer fling? 

It’s a

Up Next

What Is a Serial Dater? The Underlying Psychology and 5 Warning Signs

What Is a Serial Dater? Underlying Psychology and Five Signs

Have you ever come across someone who seems to be constantly dating, jumping from one relationship to another with lightning speed? They just might be a serial dater. What is a serial dater, you ask? 

Serial daters always have a new partner on their arm, leaving behind a trail of broken hearts. If you’ve ever wondered what drives these individuals to engage in such a whirlwind of romantic entanglements, then you’ve stumbled upon the world of serial dating. 

Let’s explore what it means to be a serial dater, identify the telltale signs of a serial dater, and delve into the complexities of this dating phenomenon. So, fasten your seatbelts as we embark on a journey to understand the enigmatic world of serial dating.

Up Next

How To Deal With A Perfectionist Partner

How To Deal With A Perfectionist Partner: Eleven Tips

Do you have a partner who constantly strives for perfection in every aspect of their life? While it may seem admirable at first, dealing with a perfectionist partner can sometimes be challenging. Let’s explore how to deal with a perfectionist partner and build a healthier relationship. 

How to deal with a perfectionist partner

A perfectionist partner has high standards and relentless pursuit of flawlessness, which can create tension and frustration in a relationship. However, it’s important to remember that perfectionism is often rooted in