We live in the millennial generation where we want instant gratifications. We have everything at our fingertips these days and we have come to think that we can download a relationship just as simply by swiping on Tinder.
We assume that once we have fallen in love, the relationship will continue to function on its own and remain the same as it was in the beginning. We think that we can get all the benefits of the relationship, without putting in the time, effort or care required to nurture it
But the fact of the matter is, relationships don’t work that way and in the course of time –without any effort or care on our part; deteriorate automatically.
In Spain, a wise quote states: “El amor no se encuentra, se construye”, translated: “True Love isn’t found, it’s built”.
Here are few simple and practical tips to imbibe into our lives to enhance our chances of building a beautiful, fulfilling and long-lasting relationship:
1) Let your partner be the first person you go to; to share important news.
Whenever there is important news to share, turn to your partner. Communicating and sharing the important events happening in your lives on a consistent basis with your partner builds a sense of belongingness and intimacy.
It shows that you consider your partners as a team and you want to have them beside you to celebrate every important milestone.
2) Express gratitude and affection for your partner
Do not take your partner or relationship for granted. Take out time to appreciate and thank your partner for the efforts that they put to nurture the relationship.
Express gratitude and affection for your partner on the consistent basis. It will make them feel reciprocated and valued for.
3) Engage in hobbies and activities together
Try and find more creative ways to connect and bond more deeply with one another. Rather than always going for happy hours and coffee dates, find out new hobbies and activities that you can explore together as a couple.
It will help you to uncover new and different facets of your (and) your partner’s personality and you will get to know each other better.
4) Find a higher purpose or goal
Couples who come together for a higher purpose or goal have better chances of being in successful, fulfilling and long-lasting relationships than couples who engage in codependent relationships.
Instead of engaging in petty attention seeking games, healthy couples devote their time and energy to work together for a higher purpose or goal and their shared purpose keeps them happy and together.
5) Stay authentic and realistic with one other
If you cannot be 100% authentic, honest and vulnerable with your partner, then who can you be authentic with?
Healthy couples give each other space to be their authentic selves.
The give each other honest feedback and reality check when required. They are always honest and realistic with one other.
6) Be willing to work hard for your relationship
“I define love thus: The will to extend one’s self for the purpose of nurturing one’s own or another’s spiritual growth.” – M. Scott Peck
True love requires effort and willingness to act in loving ways even if one does not feel like loving –for the ultimate purpose of our, our partner’s (and our relationship’s ) growth.
Successful couples recognize the fact that relationships require effort and hard work and they are willing to work at it.
7) Spend quality time with one other
It is not just the quantity of time that we spend with others that make them feel loved and cared for but the quality of time.
Successful couples make sure that they spend lots of quality time with each other. They give each other their undivided attention whenever they are together and listen attentively. They cherish the time they spend with each other and try to sneak in quality moments together in their busy schedules.