Having insecurity as a permanent part of your relationship can be damaging, and no matter how hard you try, it will end up destroying it for good. Insecurity is not always black and white and easy to understand, and that is why you need to look out for signs that you are dating an insecure man.
Many of us have dealt with shitty boyfriends in the past who were overconfident and too vain to really care about anyone else. This makes any kind of change welcome.
And so, when you finally meet a nice guy who always brings you flowers, takes you out on nice dates, doesn’t take his eyes off you the whole time and who keeps reminding you that he doesn’t really deserve you, you’re swept off your feet.
You think you might have a future together but soon enough, this kind of care and love turns into something like a crazed infatuation where his possessive actions become overwhelming. His company starts feeling exhausting, suffocating, and in fact scary.
Here Are 15 Warning Signs You Are Dating An Insecure Man
1. He doesn’t have a life outside the relationship.
He doesn’t talk about his coworkers and his own friends and you’re the only person he chills with. Besides his job, he doesn’t pursue any other activity, except being with you or just dreaming about you when he is alone. It’s like the only thing he is ever interested in doing is being with you, and you also have no other option other than being with him all the time.
It is important to have your own life outside of your relationship, and if your man does not have that, it’s a huge red flag, and you should not ignore it or take it lightly.
2. He believes you are not over your previous relationship.
For no reason at all, he firmly believes that you still love your ex, no matter how long it’s been since your break up and no matter how much you try to convince him that you have moved on for good. The only feelings you might have for your ex might be hatred, disinterest, loathing, or anger, but your current partner will never believe you, and will constantly fixate on his insecurities.
He’s too insecure to believe you can fully care for him so he concludes that you still care for your past lover.
3. He falls for you very quickly.
As soon as you’ve gone on a couple of dates, he is ready to tell you that he is head over heels in love with you, and you are the one he is meant to spend his life with. Initially, you might think that this is adorable but soon enough you’ll realize that the intensity he claims is bizarre because you barely know each other.
When someone tells you “I love you”, just after a few dates, then it’s one of the biggest red flags that you should reconsider taking things further with that person.
4. He is scarily intense with his feelings.
He is convinced that nothing means more to him than you. You are the reason for his continued existence. You are the center of his universe. You are the apple of his eye. And if you are not there in his life, there’s no point living it. Get the gist? Having strong feelings for someone, and wanting them to be a part of your life is okay, but this kind of scary intensity is not.
You might feel warm and fuzzy about this in the beginning but the sheer burden of his feelings will get to you at some point as he will completely depend on you to keep him stable.
5. He always needs affirmations of his feelings.
An insecure man has very little confidence in himself so he’ll keep asking you if you love him and will be desperate for any sort of appreciation. An insecure man will always depend on his partner to make him feel good about himself, and will not stop unless he gets an unhealthy amount of emotional validation.
But even when you tell him that you love him or try to compliment him, he won’t accept that you mean what you say. He will think that you are trying to flatter him and just making him happy.
6. He’s extremely possessive of you.
You hanging out with friends or colleagues, especially men, can set him off. He’ll keep messaging or calling to see what you’re up to when he is not there. He will constantly think that you are up to something shady behind his back, and will doubt you, no matter how hard you may try to convince him.
You might be pleased with the attention at first but it will soon become annoying as you won’t be able to spend time with the people who make you happy.