Successful Relationships Follow These 8 Rules, As Per Experts Who Studied Couples For 50 Years


Successful Relationships Follow These 8 Rules As Per Experts

Experts are saying that the most successful relationships tend to be successful because of the 8 rules that happy couples follow. So, what are these rules and how do they ensure that your relationship not just survives in the long run, but survives happily?

As reported by CNBC, over the course of five decades, two distinguished experts, one, a  psychologist, and the other, a sexologist have dedicated their careers to studying the secrets behind successful relationships. Contrary to popular belief, they discovered that happy couples do not argue less; instead, they argue more effectively.

Armed with this insight, they propose a transformative approach to conflict resolution by suggesting a temporary truce and implementing a plan for better communication.

So what are these successful relationship rules? Read on to know more!

Related: The Love Manifesto: 10 Fundamental Rules of Love

Successful Relationships Follow These 8 Rules, As Per Experts

1. We will never mistake honesty for cruelty. 

Successful couples embrace honesty while remaining sensitive to their partner’s feelings. They strive to express their thoughts and emotions openly without resorting to cruelty or harsh words.

2. We will not engage in any sort of abuse, name-calling, and shaming of each other. 

In the heat of an argument, it can be tempting to unleash hurtful words upon your partner. However, the most successful relationships recognize the destructive power of name-calling and shaming. Instead, couples prioritize respect and refrain from resorting to personal attacks.

Successful relationships rules

3. We will always try to resolve the issue so that both of us can move forward. 

Rather than allowing conflicts to escalate or linger unresolved, successful couples approach disagreements with a shared objective: to find a resolution that allows them to move forward together.

4. We will not try to run away from the conversation or issue, but taking a short time-out can sometimes be useful. 

Recognizing the need for emotional regulation, successful couples understand that it’s acceptable to request a short break during intense discussions. This break, typically around 20 minutes, provides an opportunity to gather thoughts, calm emotions, and regain composure.

Couples return to the conversation with a renewed sense of clarity and are better equipped to communicate constructively.

Related: Relationship Advice From Over 1500 Happily Married Couples

5. We will firmly believe that both of us want to same thing, that is to connect and work on the issues, together. 

To create a harmonious atmosphere during disagreements, successful couples approach conflicts with the belief that both partners share the same fundamental desire: to connect and enhance their relationship.

This assumption establishes a collaborative mindset, allowing them to tackle the problem as a team rather than as adversaries.

6. We will always keep in mind that it’s “us against the problem”, and not “you vs me”. 

Rather than turning against each other, successful couples adopt a united front when confronting challenges. They understand that the problem is separate from their partner’s character and strive to work together to find solutions.

7. We will say “I feel…” instead of blaming each other and saying “You did this!” or “You did that!”. 

In order to prevent blame and accusations from escalating conflicts, successful couples utilize “I feel” statements to express their emotions and needs.

By framing their concerns in terms of personal experiences rather than pointing fingers, couples encourage empathy and understanding, fostering a more constructive dialogue.

8. We will express our positive needs to each other. 

Successful couples understand the importance of communicating their needs in a positive manner. By expressing desires for emotional closeness, connection, and understanding, partners can better articulate what they require from the relationship.

What Does This Research Prove?

In the realm of successful relationships and rules for successful relationships, effective communication lies at the heart of enduring love and happiness. The eight rules of engagement, derived from decades of psychological research, offer invaluable guidance for couples seeking to enhance their connections.

Related: Growing Stronger Together: 11 Clear Signs Your Relationship Is Getting Healthier

By fostering an environment of honesty, respect, and understanding, couples can navigate conflicts with compassion and strive towards mutually beneficial resolutions. Incorporating these rules into daily interactions empowers couples to nurture their bond in the long run. 

successful relationship rules

— About the Author —

Leave a Reply

Up Next

Beyond Chemical Imbalances: Researchers Shed Light on Social Root Causes Of Depression

In a recent letter to the editor published in Molecular Psychiatry, researchers led by Joanna Moncrieff present a compelling argument challenging the conventional understanding of depression. They assert that rather than being solely attributed to chemical imbalances in the brain, and discuss the social root causes of depression.

According to Moncrieff et al., the evidence for brain differences in depression is lacking, while there is substantial support for the influence of social and environmental factors on mental health.

They argue that the circumstances of life, such as stress and adversity, play a more significant role in shaping depressive symptoms than neuro

Up Next

Study Reveals Presence of Microplastics in Human Brain: Concerns Rise Over Health Implications

In a groundbreaking revelation, researchers from the University of New Mexico have discovered microplastics infiltrating human brain tissue, as reported in a study published in the journal Environment Health Perspectives. The study sheds light on the pervasive presence of microplastics in various organs of the body, including the kidneys, liver, and brain.

Eliseo Castillo, an associate professor leading the research, underscores the widespread distribution of microplastics in the environment, emphasizing their presence in water sources, food items, and even the air we breathe.

Previous studies have estimated that individuals ingest approximately five grams of microplastics weekly, equivalent to the weight of a credit card.

Up Next

Study Reveals Significant Genetic Link Between Treatment-Resistant Depression and Family History

In a groundbreaking study published in the journal JAMA Psychiatry, researchers have uncovered a substantial genetic link between treatment-resistant depression (TRD) and family history.

Led by Dr. Cheng-Ta Li, a professor of medicine at the National Yang-Ming Chiao Tung University in Taipei, Taiwan, the study utilized extensive national health insurance data to investigate the transmission of TRD across generations and its association with other psychiatric disorders.

The findings of the study are particularly significant, as they shed light on the hereditary nature of TRD and its implications for early intervention and treatment.

Up Next

FDA Clears Prescription Digital Therapeutic for Adults with Major Depressive Disorder

The FDA has recently cleared a groundbreaking prescription digital therapeutic, known as Rejoyn, for the treatment of major depressive disorder (MDD) symptoms in adults. This innovative therapy, developed by Otsuka Pharmaceutical Co. Ltd. in collaboration with Click Therapeutics Inc., aims to provide adjunctive care for individuals who have been prescribed antidepressants as part of clinician-managed outpatient treatment.

Rejoyn is a 6-week treatment program designed to assist individuals aged 22 years and older in regulating their emotions through a combination of clinically validated cognitive training exercises and therapeutic lessons.

The therapy utilizes digital platforms to deliver pe

Up Next

Sweet Science: How Chocolate’s Theobromine May Aid Weight Loss and Alzheimer’s Prevention

A recent study conducted by researchers at Zhengzhou University in China suggests that indulging in chocolate could offer various health benefits, including weight loss assistance and Alzheimer’s prevention.

Published in the Journal of Functional Foods, the study highlights the potential of a chemical compound found in chocolate called theobromine to positively impact both the body and the brain.

Theobromine, present in cocoa beans, boasts anti-inflammatory properties and is rich in antioxidants, making it beneficial for brain health. According to scientists, this compound can protect against Alzhei

Up Next

New Study Finds High Genetic Risk for Obesity May Require Over 14,500 Daily Steps

A recent study published in JAMA Network Open reveals a significant association between genetic risk for obesity and the amount of physical activity required to mitigate the risk.

Led by Dr. Evan Brittain, associate professor of medicine at Vanderbilt University Medical Center, the study analyzed data from 3,124 participants in the National Institutes of Health’s All of Us Research Program to explore the link between genetic predisposition to obesity and recommended step counts for reducing the genetic risk of developing the condition.

Findings from the study indicate that individuals with a higher genetic risk of obesity may need to undertake more physical activity

Up Next

Ketogenic Diets Show Promise for Bipolar Disorder and Schizophrenia Treatment, Stanford Study Finds

A recent study led by researchers at Stanford University suggests that ketogenic diets may offer benefits for individuals with bipolar disorder and schizophrenia, shedding light on the potential role of diet in managing serious mental illnesses.

The findings, published in Psychiatry Research, highlight the positive impact of a ketogenic regime on both psychiatric outcomes and metabolic syndromes commonly associated with these conditions.

Unlike traditional diets, ketogenic diets are characterized by high fat, moderate protein, and very low carbohydrate intake. The study, led by Dr. Shebani Sethi, a clinical ass