If He Wanted To Be With You, He Would Be With You

 / 

, ,
If He Wanted To Be With You 1

You may ask yourself, “Is he afraid of commitment or just not into me?”. It’s a hard pill to swallow. But the truth is going to heal your heart a lot faster than simply letting it break over and over until you finally face what you knew all along anyway: “If he wanted to be with you he would be with you.”




There are a million possible scenarios here. It’s easier when he’s an asshole – selfish, only thinking of himself, using you to make someone else jealous, using you in general, treating you poorly, crushing you thoughtlessly, whatever. But it’s a lot harder when he’s a good guy, and you still have to let him go.

When he tells you that you’re an incredible person, but he just doesn’t feel the same way that you do. Or when he really likes you but doesn’t think you’re the one. Or when he just doesn’t feel as strongly as you do and he wants to be honest.



If He Wanted To Be With You He Would Be With You

Or when he can’t seem to make up his mind and feels confused, which he doesn’t yet realize just means that he’s afraid of hurting you, that feeling ‘confused’ just a softer way of eventually saying ‘no.’

If he wanted to be with you, he wouldn’t have had to make up his mind in the first place. It would just be an answer that he felt deeply in his gut.

Related: 5 Pieces of Advice To Start Dating After Heartbreak




But regardless, whether he’s a wonderful guy or an asshole or somewhere in between, this is about you, moving on. Because no matter what the situation was, no matter how well he treated you or how much fun you had together or how well you got along, he doesn’t want to be with you. And that’s the truth.

And that’s going to be your life raft for the next several weeks or months, no matter how much you don’t want to grab onto it. It is what is going to eventually help you come to peace with the end of your relationship, or the fizzling out of your fling, or the ‘no more talking’ after you guys spent so much time ‘talking.’ It is the truth, and as ugly as it is, it will be the only thing that can help you move on:

If he wanted to be with you he would be with you.

It’s easy to try to soften the blow. He needs time, or he just needs a little space, or he’s just afraid of commitment and I just need to reassure him, or he builds walls and it’s my job to kick through them.

if he wanted to be with you he would

But think about the way you feel about him. How easy and natural and obvious it feels. How you don’t even need to question whether or not you should be with him, because it just feels right in your veins.

How, even if you were scared of committing to someone or getting hurt or opening yourself up, you were still willing to do it, because your heart had already made up your mind. You wanted to be with him, so you were. The decision was simple. It really wasn’t even a decision at all.

Related: 7 Ways Your Heartbreak Makes You Wiser




Now can you imagine feeling all those things but choosing not to be with him anyway?

That’s why your heart is broken. Because he didn’t feel those things. He didn’t feel that same certainty that you did, deep in your bones. And you can’t change that, and you can’t fix yourself, and there’s nothing you did wrong. It’s just the truth. His heart didn’t make the decision for his brain, because his heart is in a different place from yours. And that really, really sucks. And you just have to accept it. And that sucks even more.

Maybe you’ll get over this in weeks, maybe months. Maybe longer. It will hurt, some days will be horrible and some will be okay. But the smallest of silver linings is this: you can let your heartbreak once – instead of breaking it a million times by convincing yourself that he’s making a mistake or he probably misses you or you should call him.

if he wanted to be with you he would

Love yourself enough to be hard on yourself. These are signs he doesn’t want to be with you and if he wanted he would. So stop trying so hard for someone who won’t do the same for you.

If he wanted to be with you he would be with you. Maybe he doesn’t feel the same way anymore but that doesn’t mean you will wait forever for him.

Read Healing From Heartbreak: 5 Important Steps You Can Take To Move On


If He Wanted To Be With You pin


— Share —

— About the Author —

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Up Next

It’s Time To Leave! 12 Unmistakable Signs You’ll See When God Blocks A Relationship

When God Blocks a Relationship 12 Clear Signs Appear

When God blocks a relationship no matter how hard you try, it’s going to hit a dead end, sooner or later. But before the final split, God also sends signs that it’s time to leave; know more here!

Are you wondering “Is God telling me to break up with my boyfriend or girlfriend?” If such a thought has crept into your mind, chances are you’re already seeing the signs and can feel it in your heart that something is not right.

But before we begin, we would like to clear something up. By “God”, we are not referring to any specific religion, but the Universe, Spirit, or Source energy which is beyond any labeling.

When talking about signs from God about relationships, please take what resonates and leave what doesn’t. This blog is written from a spiritual perspective, taking into account advice fr

Up Next

Planning The Perfect Date Night: 4 Science-Backed Ideas

Planning the Perfect Date Night: 4 Science-Backed Ideas

Have you been trying your hand at planning date nights? Date nights are the perfect opportunity to unwind and connect with your partner, but how can you make it truly special and unforgettable?

This article is going to talk about four science-backed ideas that can help you plan the perfect date night, ensuring you both have an experience that’s not only fun but meaningful.

KEY POINTS

Engaging in exciting new activities together boosts excitement and mimics the feeling of falling in love.

Movie nights can improve relationships by fostering open and safe communication.

Up Next

How To Make Long Distance Relationships Work? 7 Useful Tips!

How to Make Long Distance Relationships Work? 7 Useful Tips!

Do you believe in long distance relationships? If you’re in one, you must know how satisfying and equally challenging it can get. Understanding how to make long distance relationships work, can, therefore, be the most important thing for you, right now!

Successful long-distance relationships (LDRs) are proof that even in today’s fast paced world of speed dating, ghosting, and phubbing, for some people at least, love is still about emotions, feelings, patience, values, faith, and trust.

For them, distance, carnal desires, and instant gratification don’t matter; what matters is to be true to their heart’s de

Up Next

Sudden Repulsion Syndrome: Why Does Love Turn To Disgust Overnight?

12 Sudden Repulsion Syndrome Symptoms: When Love Turns Sour

Ever looked at your partner and, out of nowhere, felt the ick? The way they chew, the way they breathe, even the way they exist near you suddenly feels unbearable. If this sounds familiar, you might be experiencing Sudden Repulsion Syndrome (SRS). Here’s a breakdown of what it might mean in your relationship!

This strange phenomenon can strike out of nowhere, especially in long-term relationships or marriage. One day, everything feels normal, and the next, you can’t stand being around your partner. But why does this happen? More importantly, how do you overcome it?

What Is Sudden Repulsion Syndrome In Marriage or Long-term Relationships?

Up Next

How To Get An Avoidant Ex Back: Do They Always Come Back After No Contact?

How To Get An Avoidant Ex Back? 8 Tricks Work Like a Charm

Do you love hard? And did it push your partner away, instead of pulling them closer? If yes, then you might be dealing with an avoidant! So, how to get an avoidant ex back? Let’s find out!

Reconnecting with an ex is challenging enough! To top it all off, if your ex is someone with an  avoidant attachment style, you have your work cut out for you.

Avoidants can’t handle emotional pressure or demands. They are hyper independent people who value their personal space a little bit too much.

And if you’re someone with an anxious attachment style, then chances are you have come on too strong, and scared them off.

Please don’t think you’re be

Up Next

7 Signs You’re Unknowingly Being Mean To Your Partner

Being Mean To Your Partner? 7 Toxic Habits To Watch For

Being mean to your partner doesn’t always look like full-blown fights or throwing personal insults around. More often than not, it’s those little, unintentional habits that slowly chip away at your relationship, and by the time you notice them, it’s already too late.

You might be under the impression that you are simply joking around or being honest with them, but have you ever asked your partner if they feel the same way as you? Maybe there are signs you are the toxic partner, but you have never really stopped and thought about it.

We all screw up sometimes, but recognizing the problem is the first step to fixing it. So, let’s break down some of the sneaky ways you might be being mean to your partner—without even realizing it.

Up Next

7 Signs Of Agape Love: What It Means To Love Unconditionally

7 Signs of Agape Love: What It Means To Love Unconditionally

We all know who messy modern relationships can be. Swipe right, swipe left, ghosting, breadcrumbing, situationships – it’s a circus out there and things are getting even crazier! In the midst of all this, exists something called “agape love”. Today, we are going to talk about what it is and the signs of agape love.

So, what keeps some relationships rock-solid when everything else feels disposable? It’s agape love. And once you experience and understand the characteristics of agape love in your life, it’s like an eureka moment.

You realize that true and unconditional love is more than butterflies and romantic gestures; it’s more about being there when it matters the most, even when things may seem tough.

Let’s first try to understand what is the meaning of agape love really.

<