30 Characteristics of Happy Couples

Linda and Charlie Bloom

 / 

,
characteristics of happy couples

The happy couple checklist.

Linda: When my husband Charlie and I were interviewing the happiest couples we could find, we could clearly see that they were among the group that was keeping the passionate romance alive over many decades. These were some of the themes that ran through their stories.

Please consider this happy couple checklist and add some components of your own.

30 Characteristics of Happy Couples:

1. Vision:

Happy couple old a grand vision of what your partnership can be and roll up your sleeves to get to work to manifest that vision.

2. Define Romance:

People have different ideas about romance. Be sure to have conversations defining what romance means to you so you can manifest what you are longing for.

Read The Truth About Marriage: 8 Relationship Tips By Michelle Obama

3. Commitment:

Commit each day and demonstrate that commitment.

4. Interests:

Have an interesting career, hobbies, and areas of interest to keep each individual lively.

5. Adventure:

Keep your sense of adventure alive, try new things, and take risks.

6. Listening:

Listen deeply.

It won't matter how loud you love

7. Curiosity:

Be curious with the wonder of a child.

8. Questions:

Ask questions that show your sincere interest.

Read 6 Reasons Why Happy Couples Post Less About Their Relationship On Social Media

9. Healing:

Heal all past wounds.

10. Learning:

Keep learning and growing. When you remain interesting your partner will be interested in you. Having an interesting career, hobbies, and other areas of interest keep each individual lively. And therefore, they bring their happy interesting self to their partner.

11. Privacy:

Honor your partner’s privacy by spending time apart.

12. Staying Power:

Don’t quit during the hard segments of the partnership.

13. Honesty:

Be honest and trustworthy.

without trust, honesty, and communication love is just another four-letter word, like shit.

14. Agreements:

Keep agreements, big ones like fidelity, and even the small ones count.

15. Tolerance:

Be tolerant and accepting of your partner’s shortcomings.

16. Good news:

Focus on your partner’s assets and strengths.

17. Respect.

18. Conflict Management:

Arguments can be enlivening and exciting. Those who are conflict-avoidant can repress emotions with a result of flattening the relationship. Disappointments, frustrations, hurts, and grievances need to be brought forward. Only then can the couple negotiate to have their needs met. Respectful airing of differences breathes passion into the partnership, keeping the romantic quotient high.

19. No threats or ultimatums.

20. Forgiveness:

Be willing to forgive past transgressions.

love is an act of endless forgiveness.

21. Myths:

Examine your beliefs to find if there are limiting ones that may be detracting from having an excellent partnership.

22. Self-revelation:

Reveal rather than conceal; express rather than repress.

23. Secrets:

Happy couples have no secrets or lies.

24. Needs:

Tell your partner what you need.

Read 7 Daily Rituals Happy Couples Use To Cultivate Lasting Love

25. Attractiveness:

Stay attractive.

26. Humor:

Humor is associated with novelty and the unexpected and will bring lightness and fun.

27. Stretch:

Stretch into your partner’s world if you possibly can.

28. Sex:

Refine your sexual relationship for maximum pleasure. Making love in a place in the house other than your regular bed adds sparkle.

Read 9 Things Genuinely Happy Couples Do To Stay Connected and In Love Forever

29. Intimacy:

Non-sexual intimacy is a deep knowledge of each other, the innermost parts of each other.

30. Gratitude:

Express gratitude for the way your partner enriches your life.

The above characteristics of couples that keep the romance alive over decades can be yours.

Please don’t be confined to this happy couple checklist. If there are other items that you can give yourself credit for, by all means do so. And if there are attitudes and behaviors that you identify as those areas where you need to improve, by all means, note those.

It’s unlikely that you would get a perfect score of 100% by checking off every item on the list, but it’s a worthy goal to master each one over the years together. It requires some work on our parts to be eligible for such a passionate, long-term romance. But what have we got better to do with our time.

We’re giving away 3 e-books absolutely free of charge. The Ten Biggest Things We’ve Learned Since We Got Married, Your Guide to Great Sex, and An End to Arguing. To receive them just click here.

Written by Linda and Charlie Bloom
Originally appeared in Psychology today
Republished with permission
30 Characteristics of Happy Couples
30 Characteristics of Happy Couples
characteristics of happy couples pin
characteristics of happy couples

— Share —

, ,

— About the Author —

Linda and Charlie Bloom

Linda Bloom, LCSW and Charlie Bloom, MSW have been trained as psychotherapists and relationship counselors and have worked with individuals, couples, groups, and organizations since 1975. They have lectured and taught at universities and learning institutes throughout the USA, including the Esalen Institute, the Kripalu Center for Yoga and Health, 1440 Multiversity, and many others.  They have taught seminars in many countries throughout the world. They have co-authored four books, 101 Things I Wish I Knew When I Got Married: Simple Lessons to Make Love Last, Secrets of Great Marriages: Real Truth From Real Couples About Lasting Love, Happily Ever After And 39 Other Myths About Love, and That Which Doesn’t Kill Us: How One Couple Became Stronger at the Broken Places. They have been married since 1972 and are the parents of two adult children and three grandsons. Linda and Charlie live in Santa Cruz, California. Their website is www.bloomwork.com

Leave a Reply



Up Next

9 Tactics To Trigger The Hero Instinct In A Man

Hero Instinct In A Man: Ways To Trigger Their Inner Hero

Do you know there’s a hero instinct in every man? If you want to unlock that side of your man then you have come to the right place. Today, we are going to talk about how to trigger the hero instinct in a man, and do it the right way.

From understanding their innate drive to protect and provide, to unraveling the mysteries of their emotional landscape, we will explore what is the hero instinct, and what does hero instinct in relationships look like.

So, ready to know more about this side to men? Let’s go then.

Related: How To Make Your Man Happy: 25+ Last Minute Gift Ideas For Him



Up Next

Lost Connection: How To Heal From Emotional Neglect In Marriage And Find Hope

How To Heal From Emotional Neglect In Marriage: Tips

Do you know why some marriages appear to be thriving while others seem to be crumbling? What is it that creates such distance among spouses? While there can be various reasons behind marital distress, one often overlooked but significant factor is emotional neglect in marriage.

Emotional neglect can quietly erode the foundation of a relationship, leaving both partners feeling lonely, disconnected, and unfulfilled. Let us delve into the depths of emotional neglect in marriage, exploring what actually is, signs, underlying causes, and most importantly, how to heal and nurture a healthier emotional connection with your spouse.

What is Emotional Neglect in Marriage?

Emotional neglect in marriage refers to a pat



Up Next

6 Minutes To Improve Your Relationship: How To Have Better Communication With Your Partner

Minutes To Improve Your Relationship?

If you are thinking about how to improve your relationship, then you have come to the right place. How to better communicate with your partner? Communication is crucial to building a healthy relationship, and this article is going to talk about that. Let’s explore how to have better communication with your partner.

KEY POINTS

The three keys to communication are speaking openly, listening empathically, and reflecting back.

We usually skip reflection, so the speaker does not know if they have been heard.

A simple practice of reflection can build this skill.

Does your par



Up Next

6 Unconventional Relationship Choices That May Seem Weird, But They Do Work

Unconventional Relationship Choices That Actually Work

Unconventional relationship choices, huh? They’re like the hidden gems of the dating world, the rebels of romance, the quirks that keep love alive. Even though traditional relationships have their own appeal and charm, sometimes it’s the unconventional that brings some excitement into our lives.

From open relationships to living apart together, these relationship choices may be frowned upon, but for many people, these are the relationship choices that work the best for them. To each his own, you know.

Such non traditional relationships go against what most people think is normal, however, they show us that l



Up Next

7 Research Backed Relationship Remedies

Research Backed Relationship Remedies

When it comes to dealing with relationship problems, science can prove to be really helpful and can provide you with some substantial research-backed relationship remedies. This article is going to talk about some of the most effective and useful relationship remedies that can make a huge difference to your relationship.

You may think these should go without saying, but in my personal and professional experience, they have not.

7 Research Backed Relationship Remedies

1. Be Quick to Repair Injury

One day, my wife sensed my odd vibe, I didn’t like her asking, and it gr



Up Next

What is a Trophy Husband In Today’s Relationship Dynamics?

Signs of a Trophy Husband: Exploring Modern Masculinity

Most of us are aware of the term “trophy wife”. But have you heard about a “trophy husband”? It is a somewhat new term that is a gender-swapped version of the more popular concept of “trophy wife”. 

In today’s evolving society, where gender roles are constantly being redefined, there’s a rising trend of trophy husbands. These men are not only eye-catching companions but also possess qualities that make them desirable partners. 

Today, let us explore this fascinating concept and understand what is a trophy husband,  the signs to look for, why being a trophy husband is exhausting, and the potential issues that can arise in relationships with them.

What is a Trophy Husband?



Up Next

Feeling Like Roommates In A Marriage? 7 Signs Of Roommate Syndrome And What You Can Do To Change That

Feeling Like Roommates In A Marriage? Signs Spark Is Gone

Are you feeling like roommates in a marriage? You know, that sinking feeling when you realize the spark has fizzled, and your relationship has become more about paying bills and coordinating schedules than love and connection.

The thing is, roommate syndrome is more common than you think, and many couples face this, after being together for a long time. When you are in the roommate phase of a relationship, you might ask yourself why and when the romance disappeared or if you’re both just pretending to be happy.

But that might not be the case. In this article, we are going to look at what is roommate syndrome, the signs of roommate syndrome, and how to deal with roommate syndrome, so that you stop feeling like roommates in a marriage.

So, let’s get started, shall we?

— Follow Us —