1. You follow texting “rules”
In any healthy relationship, texting happens naturally in a back and forth manner. However, in a toxic relationship texting your partner can feel like a game that includes a lot of calculations and strategies requiring you to “win”. If you feel like you have to stick to certain rules when it comes to texting your partner, then you need to take a hard look at your relationship. Some of the rules may include –
- Trying to appear busy and waiting for some time to reply back
- Focusing excessively on read receipts
- Reading between the lines of the texts
- Deliberately not responding making you desperate to text your partner
- Rewriting each text several times trying to figure out exactly what you should say before sending
Texting should be about communication, not about playing mind games.
2. Your partner deliberately ignores you
Do you feel your partner intentionally ignores your texts? A toxic partner may often refrain from responding to your texts because you were unable to promptly respond earlier. In an unhealthy relationship, toxic communication habits will thrive. Your partner may want to create friction and drama by ignoring you and going into “radio silence”. Talking to your partner about this can be helpful as they might have felt ignored by you in the first place. But make sure you stick only to the issue of texting. However, when this kind of behavior becomes a habit, then it can be one of the hidden signs of a toxic relationship
3. You have to respond immediately
“Relationships based on obligation lack dignity.” – Wayne Dyer
Does your partner expect you to reply right away? If you are expected to instantly respond to each one of their texts, irrespective of your daily schedule, then you might be with a toxic partner. The truth is, you have a life of your own and you need to focus on your own life and career. It is not possible for anyone to stay glued to their phones all the time. If your partner expects you to reply immediately, then clearly they do not respect your personal space, your career, your time or you. In a healthy relationship, partners understand each other and realize that it’s not necessary to get a response to every text in 10 seconds.
4. Your partner texts constantly
If your partner keeps texting you continuously, especially when you’re busy and unable to respond, then it can be a serious relationship red flag. Although it may seem cute on the surface, in reality these are warning signs of insecurity and manipulation. If your partner texts you until you respond, then it can often leave you feeling stressed, anxious and overwhelmed. Moreover, it can be a serious cause for concern as it may lead to a lot of anger and frustration in your partner that will grow overtime.
Most of us tend to over-text when we don’t get a response but when your partner goes overboard even after knowing well about your schedule, then it can only hint at a toxic and unhealthy relationship.
Apart from these, your partner may also exhibit some other toxic behaviors that are warning signs of digital abuse.
5. Digital gaslighting
A toxic and narcissistic partner may try to manipulate your smartphone and other synchronized devices in order to gain better control over you. And they will do all this behind your back to mess with your mind. This is a form of gaslighting and can make you question your sense of reality. They might delete certain names for the contact list, delete messages from your inbox and media from the gallery or they may reply to texts from others pretending to be you. But worst of all they will convince you that you have done all that. Or that your phone is malfunctioning. They will be so convincing that you will believe them and doubt yourself to eventually believe their reality. Gaslighting in any form is always one of the glaring signs of a toxic relationship,