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6 Signs He Is Incapable Of Love

Signs He Incapable Of Love

Romance books and fairytales have spoiled us. Toss in the movie too, as long as we are at it. Haven’t we all fancied finding somebody who was missing somebody just like us to come and fill up his life with light and joy? There is just one teeny-tiny problem, and that is many people are well and truly incapable of love.

Love is that one thing that everyone wants to be good at, but unfortunately, everyone can’t; some people are just not built for love. Many men miserably fail when it comes to love because such men are only concerned about themselves. They might lead you for some time because, at the end of the day, you are good for their ego, but the moment boredom starts to set in, you will be discarded like a broken toy.

Of course, not all men are like this. So in order to understand the good from the bad, you need to know the signs that say a man is incapable of love.

Here Are 6 Signs He Is Incapable Of Love

1. He disrespects you left, right, and center.

The most likely reason he is incapable of loving you might be because he is incapable of seeing you — or any other woman as a person and an equal. A man who believes you to simply be an object in his life, to be used as and when he pleases, will never bother to stop and think about how you feel. He is incapable of seeing you as a human being with feelings.

It could be in your presence or to your face when he puts you down or it could be in your absence when you hear or have a strong suspicion that he is disrespecting you behind your back. Chances are, he does and he doesn’t care how you feel about that. A man who is incapable of love only sees you as something to own — beyond that, you are left to fend for yourself and pick up the pieces.

Related: 6 Subtle Forms of Disrespect in Relationships and How To Deal

2. He has a disturbing history.

Almost everyone has a history and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that, but if someone has a history of abusing people and treating them despicably, then that’s a cause for concern. If you come across a man who is incapable of love, chances are you are not the first one he is treating badly. Yes, some people change, but then some people don’t. This is because those negative behaviors are a part of their character and mindset.

If he has cheated on every woman he has been with, and abused them physically, mentally, and emotionally, then that says everything about his character. When you love someone, you can never treat them this way. If you are with someone like this, then do yourself a favor, and leave him.

3. He is narcissistic to the bone.

Being self-aware is healthy. Being self-obsessed and narcissistic is not.

When a person is self-obsessed, it is a clear sign that they are incapable of thinking of anyone but themselves. These kinds of people are just waiting for the spotlight to be on them and everyone else to chant their name. He will look like he is listening when you talk, but you know he was only waiting so that you’d stop talking and you both can discuss things related to him. What you have to say or what you are going through is not important for him. At all.

He will expect you to be there in his time of need and do everything an ideal girlfriend does, but he will be nowhere around when it is your turn to rely on him for support. But the moment you call him out on this, he will manipulate you and gaslight you and make you feel as if it’s your fault somehow.

Related: The Narcissistic Lover’s Playbook: Stages of Relationship With a Narcissist

4. He makes sexist and dirty comments about women.

This is one of the biggest signs that he is an extremely toxic man who is incapable of love. When a man makes misogynistic and chauvinistic comments, it shows his mindset. When your man objectifies women and shames them, then it clearly means that he hates women. And how can you expect to be in a relationship with a person who hates women, which by the way includes you too?

A man like this is poisonous and will destroy you and your life. How can you be with someone who will not even treat you with an ounce of respect? Relationships are meant to help you grow and give you happiness, not destroy you emotionally.

5. He is never accountable for his repulsive actions.

You cannot have a healthy relationship with someone where only one person gives and the other person takes. You cannot have a healthy relationship with someone who refuses to admit his mistakes, and always forces you to be accountable for HIS blunders.

Even when it is clearly his fault, somehow you will always end up apologizing because he might get so sad or fly into such a rage, that you will have no other option. He will make you feel that you are making a big deal out of it, and you should just forget what he did and basically force yourself to be fine with his never-ending toxicity.

6 Signs He Is Incapable Of Love

Similarly, while talking about his past relationships, it will always be his exes’ fault as to why it never worked out. Their fault was that he was “forced” to sleep with some other girl, they stopped glamming-up for him and let themselves go, or tested his limits so much that he just couldn’t stop but hit them. Chances are if he murdered someone for not satisfying his ego, it won’t be his fault, it will be someone else’s.

6. He will tell you that he will treat you badly.

Yes, there are men who will tell you on your face that they will treat you badly because they don’t know how to love someone else other than themselves. When a man tells you he is going to be a douche, always believe him. You might have the urge and confidence in yourself that you will be able to love him and fix him, but don’t even try; you will just be wasting your time and opening the doors to a world of pain.

If he tells you he is incapable of love, is not looking for a relationship, or anything that suggests he is not going to be invested in you then take him seriously and just let him go. It might hurt in the beginning, but it will be the best thing for you in the long run.

Women have a tendency to take the blame on themselves. Oftentimes, you might think that you were being clingy and demanding and it’s your fault he is behaving in such a horrible manner, instead of accepting that the man you are with is just incapable of affection or love. A relationship that is so manipulative, one-sided, and emotionally-depreciating is only going to hurt you. So, don’t give him that power anymore and leave before you completely lose yourself.


6 Signs He Is Incapable Of Love
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Sugar Quill

I am a writer, an artist and an architect. I believe everything tells you a story if you look for it long enough — after all, universe is not made of atoms, it is made of tiny stories. When I am not writing or making the next cosy house, I am usually reading books and sipping tea. Coffee is fine, but nobody can convince me it is as satisfactory as tea.View Author posts

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