When someone asks me what my future holds. You will be hungry again in one hour.
– Unknown
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When Someone Asks Me What My Future Holds
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Me and my best friend giving each other relationship advice, is the blind leading the blind.
– Unknown
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I’m so sick of my problems! I want rich people’s problems. Like where to park my yacht.
– Unknown
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HIRINGLooking for someone to take care of me financially, full time only.
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I was out with a bunch of people this weekend and this guy suddenly went “man I miss my wife” and went home, like… I want that.
– @soothingmask1
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Saw a store that has a sign that reads, “We treat you like family!” Yup, NOT going in there.
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I’m naturally funny because my life is a joke.
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Sometimes you should tell people different stories about your life, so that when they gossip about you they argue.
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