ARIES: Important things they need to remember but refuse to write down
TAURUS: A battle between their voice of reason and their voice of hedonism
GEMINI: Constant screaming
CANCER: A bed and some snacks because they live up there 24/7
LEO: A vivid daydream about a fake interaction with their crush
VIRGO: News headlines from 2011, a list of every type of toothpaste ranked by flavor and effectiveness, and their best friend’s ex’s cousin’s Twitter handle
LIBRA: The judgmental, unfiltered version of whatever diplomatic thing they’re about to say
SCORPIO: An alternate reality in which they’re completely innocent and everyone else is at fault
SAGITTARIUS: Perfect versions of people that do not exist in real life
CAPRICORN: Every mistake they’ve ever made playing on loop
AQUARIUS: Infinite ideas for inventions, movie storylines, and get-rich- quick schemes
PISCES: Compliments they’re afraid to overwhelm people with
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