Call The Zodiac Signs When You

ARIES: Feel disoriented

TAURUS: Want to know what to make with half a cabbage and a can of beans

GEMINI: Want to shit talk

CANCER: Feel like no one else will relate

LEO: Need a cheerleader

VIRGO: Want a thorough report back on the current situation

LIBRA: Want a movie rec

SCORPIO: Need to be negged out of wallowing

SAGITTARIUS: Want to hear a hot take

CAPRICORN: Need to sit in silence with someone

AQUARIUS: Need a distraction

PISCES: Want to commiserate