If you have been conditioned by trauma early on to feel relief and familiarity in chaos, it can take some deprogramming to make choices that center your peace and detach rather than give in to your impulse to control a toxic environment or change toxic people. One way to slowly begin this deprogramming is by doing a small action every day that prioritizes your peace rather than an action that caters to that familiar longing to stay in a toxic environment and work around it. This can help to challenge people-pleasing tendencies.
After certain things happen, you don’t feel the same way about people, no matter who they are.
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From, Ignoring everyone else just to be available to one.To, Being available to everyone else just to forget the one.We learned a lot.
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For any woman who needs to hear this: there are men who will sit and listen to you while you talk about something that bothered you. There are men out there who will apologize and take accountability. Men that you can grow with. Men that will make you feel appreciated. You don’t have to go through years with somebody who doesn’t know how to communicate and has no emotional intelligence.
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Life changes. You lose love. You lose friends. You lose pieces of yourself that you never imagined would be gone.
And then, without you even realizing it, these pieces come back. New love enters. Better friends come along. And a stronger, wiser you are staring back in the mirror.
– Preetham Mohanty
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Healing has taught me that honesty won’t ruin real connections. Expressing your feelings won’t cost you anything valuable. Setting boundaries won’t drive away the right people, and authenticity won’t jeopardize genuine relationships. Remember this the next time you feel down because someone withdrew from you for respecting yourself, sharing your feelings, setting boundaries, or holding them accountable.
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Pain changes people. Some become rude, some become silent.
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Have you ever been in one of those strange situations when someone is blatantly lying, you know they are lying, they know you know they are lying, and yet they continue to lie?
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