Choose Her Everyday Or Leave Her

 / 

Choose Her Everyday Or Leave Her

Choose Her Everyday Or Leave Her

Why the Small Ways We Abandon Each Other Matter

I spent 5 years hurting a good woman by staying with her but never fully choosing her.

I wanted to stay with her. I really wanted to choose her over everyone else. She was an exquisite woman, brilliant and funny, elegant and sensual. She could make my whole body shiver with her quick, dark wit and turned my world tipsy turvy with her exotic beauty. Waking up every morning with her snuggled in my arms felt like home. I fiercely loved her.

Unfortunately, a very common incident with youngsters, is our ignorance of how to do well in love created stressful conflicts in our relationship. Before long, my once blissful morning reverie gave way to the strained, hurtful ways of our everyday life together.

I frequently wondered if there was another woman out there who was easier to love, and who could love me better. 

As the time passed and that thought reverberated through my mind, I chose her less and less. Every day, for five years, I chose her a little lesser that the previous day.

I stayed with her. I just didn’t choose her. And that killed us both.

Choosing her would have meant focusing on the beautiful gifts she was showering on me, without me asking for it. She would bring to me the life I would be grateful for. Her laughter, beauty, sensuality, playfulness, companionship and so much of her was inexplicable.

Sadly, I often found it nearly impossible to embrace – or even see – what was so wildly wonderful about her.

I was so focused on the anger, insecurities, demands, and other aspects of her personality that the soft silver lining about her simply went into oblivion.

The more I focused on the bad, the more I imbibed it and the more I mirrored it back to her by offering her the worst of my behaviour. Naturally, this created a tension in our relationship that almost seemed to burst.

Thus did our nasty death spiral play itself out over five years.

She fought hard to make me choose her. That’s a fool’s task.

You can’t make someone choose you, even when they might love you.

To be fair, she didn’t fully choose me, either. The rage-fueled explicit she often hurled at me was evidence enough of that.

I realize now, however, that she was often angry because she felt insecure with me. She realised that I chose her less, in my words and my actions, and she was scared of losing me.

Actually, she lost me. I abandoned her.

By not fully choosing her every day for five years, by focusing on what bothered me rather than what I adored about her, I deserted her.

Like the favorite summer flower, I brought her to home and then I left her alone in countless ways to wither in the dry hot heat of our intimate relationship.

I finally introduced myself to the worst days of life. The person I thought was suffocating me made me realise that it was her leaving that choked me.

I never again not choose the person I loved.

If you’re in relationship, I invite you to ask yourself this question: “Why am I choosing my partner today?”

If you can’t find a satisfying answer, dig deeper and find one. It could be as simple as noticing that in your deepest heart’s truth, “I just do.”

If you can’t find it today, ask yourself again tomorrow. We all have days we feel disconnected. That’s not lack of feelings.

But if too many days go by and you just can’t connect with why you’re choosing your partner, and your relationship is rife with stress, let them go. Open the door to your heart for another human being to show up. See them with fresh eyes and a yearning heart that will enthusiastically choose them every day.

Your loved one deserves to be enthusiastically chosen. 

You do, too.

Choose wisely.

Written by Bryan Reeves

Source – Uplift Connect


Choose Her Everyday Or Leave Her
Choose Her Everyday Or Leave Her
Choose Her Everyday Or Leave Her
Choose Her Everyday Or Leave Her

— Share —

— About the Author —

Responses

  1. Anonymous

    3.5

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *



Up Next

What Does Open Relationship Mean? 8 Rules Of Being In A Happy And Fulfilling One

Rules That Make an Open Relationship Work

Love is a marvellous thing, isn’t it? It comes in all shapes and sizes, challenging the norms and expanding our understanding of relationships. One such style that has been gaining attention and acceptance is the idea of an open relationship. So, what does open relationship mean?

We’re about to dive into the fascinating world of couples who have open relationships and where communication, trust, and exploration are the name of the game. In this article, we’ll uncover the secrets behind a healthy and fulfilling open relationship, presenting you with ten simple rules to make your journey an exciting and joyous one.



Up Next

When Love Feels Like A Repeat: 6 Warning Signs You Are Groundhogging in Relationships

Groundhogging Meaning Revealed: Signs of This Dating Trend

Do you get tired of having unsuccessful relationships back to back? Are you in a habit of falling for the same kind of toxic people just to be disappointed again? You might be stuck in Groundhogging. Let’s explore groundhogging meaning, how it affects your life and how to overcome it.

There can be challenges associated with navigating relationships. When repetitive failed relations leave you with a broken heart, self-reflection is important. Groundhogging may be a hidden factor that is affecting your dating life without your knowledge.

We are going to look into this pattern to evaluate its consequences on your romantic life.

What is Groundhogging?



Up Next

3 Ways That Grudge Dumping Destroys Relationships

Ways That Grudge Dumping Destroys Relationships

Dealing with frustration in a relationship is sometimes a very normal thing to experience. But some people let their frustration get the better of themselves, and end up grudge dumping their partner. This article is going to talk about experiencing frustration in relationships, and how grudge dumping destroys relationships.

KEY POINTS

Frustration is a natural part of any intimate relationship; grudge dumping isn’t.

Pent-up frustration can lead to temper tantrums, explosive arguments, and words designed to produce maximum hurt.

Healthy ways to process frustration in a relationship includ



Up Next

How To Make Your Man Happy: 25+ Last Minute Gift Ideas For Him

Last Minute Gift Ideas For Him That Will Save the Day

Are you still searching for the perfect last minute gift ideas for him? Looking for the best gift to buy for your man may be a little bit confusing.

You know how it goes. We are all familiar with a situation when you are too busy in your life, and suddenly you realize that some important event is just around the corner. But don’t despair! 

We have compiled a list of some really fantastic fast gifts for men that can be bought at the last minute and will make him smile.

Even when time is running short, these are simple but practical gifts that will show your love and gratitude. So let’s go ahead and find out about some wonderful gifts for men who deserve classy ones on their most memorable day!



Up Next

Why Is It So Hard To Find A Good Man? 7 Harsh Truths

Why Is It So Hard To Find A Good Man? Harsh Reasons

Why is it so hard to find a good man? This question has echoed through the minds of countless individuals searching for love, companionship, and a fulfilling relationship. 

In today’s fast-paced world, where dating apps and social media dominate the landscape, the pursuit of a genuine connection can feel like an elusive endeavor. However, by understanding the best personality traits in a man, recognizing what is required to find a good partner, and learning how to meet a nice man, we can navigate the complexities of modern dating with hope and confidence.

Who is a “Good Man”?

Before we delve into exploring what is required to find a



Up Next

Breadcrumbing in a Relationship: 6 Alarming Signs And How To Manage It

Breadcrumbing In A Relationship | Signs and How to Manage

Breadcrumbing in a relationship is like leaving tiny hints of interest without real commitment. It is confusing and can leave you wondering where you stand. 

 So, how do you know if it’s happening to you?

In this guide, we’ll discuss five signs of breadcrumbing in a relationship. We will also be providing strategies on how to deal with breadcrumbing in a relationship. 

But first, let us learn about the breadcrumbing meaning. 



Up Next

Is It Fate? 8 Unmistakable Signs of Karmic Relationships

Is It Fate? Unmistakable Signs of Karmic Relationships

In the vast theatre of human connections, certain relationships stand out, casting a spell that’s hard to break. They tug at our heartstrings in ways we can’t explain, evoking emotions so raw, so deep, that they shake the very foundation of our being. Imagine crossing paths with someone and feeling an electric charge, a cosmic familiarity. Or, on the flip side, an instant and unexplainable aversion. Maybe these are signs of karmic relationships?

It’s like a song whose lyrics you can’t quite recall, but the melody stirs something profound within. These are not just random encounters; they might be the echoes of past lifetimes reverberating in the present. Welcome to the intriguing and often tumultuous world of karmic connections.