Aren’t You Supposed To Be ‘Over It’ Already?

Aren’t you supposed to be ‘over it’ already? Why can’t you just ‘move on’?  Think twice before you say this to someone who has decided to confide in you. You’re telling me to stop holding on to the past, as if I like being stuck in the same place. As if I like freezing up out of fear every time I see the sky gets dark. Every time I go outside. Praying that I will be able to go back home in one piece. That my own family will too. Constantly listening to every sound in case I need to run. In case someone tries to hurt me. Again.  If you don’t know what hell it is to have your mind alert for danger all the time, quit lecturing me. I didn’t choose this. I’m not doing it for attention, nor am I playing the victim.  I’m trying to SURVIVE in a society that not only doesn’t support you after you’ve been wronged, but also puts the blame on you. Fuck your “forgiveness is healing”. I won’t ever forgive what they did to me. And if you can’t accept that, that’s fine by me.  But if your friend, family or someone you know confides in you, please, I beg you, don’t ever say those words. You’re just adding salt to wounds that haven’t even healed yet.

—s.s.w