Relationship Anxiety: Signs, Causes, & Ways to Cope

Relationships are a vital part of us human beings, each with their own opinions, perspectives, and problems, but who still choose to share themselves with the other. 

And while they are also a common part of life, for many, relationships can become a headache-causing anxiety problem. Health Canal has shown that an increasing number of couples experience anxiety in their own relationships and relieve them by using online therapies, especially during the pandemic. But don’t worry. There is plenty of information on how to cope with anxiety in a relationship.

Is Relationship Anxiety Normal?

It is normal to feel insecure in a relationship from time to time. But if this feeling of insecurity becomes persistent, it can cause a lot of stress. According to Health Canal, there was a huge number of couples finding online therapy and Over time, stress and insecurities will influence the perception of feelings. And in the end, the anxiety once installed may hinder the growth of the relationship. Overthinking relationship anxiety, too, may lead to preventable problems in your interactions.

If you have a thousand thoughts with negative thinking instead of enjoying yourself, then you may be experiencing relationship anxiety. Being nervous is normal, but anxious thoughts keep you from enjoying your time with your partner. After all, getting into a spiral of anxious feelings is very easy in a romantic relationship.

What Does Relationship Anxiety Look Like?

It is perfectly normal for everyone to feel anxious in the early stages of a new relationship, where there is a lot of deep breathing before every meeting. You should not worry when these negative thoughts and fears are only temporary, but they may affect your mental health if you spend too much time worrying. The following are signs of relationship anxiety:

• Constantly thinking your partner wants to break up with you: It’s usually wholly unlikely, but it can stress you. There are usually clear signals that your partner is not pleased and wants to end things, so don’t project unnecessary fear into the relationship. Take your relationship for what it really is, with its positive aspects.
• Wondering if you matter: Constantly questioning if your partner cares about you or what your partner feels will only lead to a self-fulfilling prophecy of disaster. If you can’t stop worrying about this, it will cause a loss of confidence. Talk to your partner about your fears instead of overthinking them. One of the most common symptoms is asking yourself questions like: Does he or she care about me? Will they be there for me? It’s normal to ask these questions occasionally, but when anxiety sets in, it can create a fixation on these worries, which can eventually damage the relationship.
• Asking for constant reassurance from your partner: Low self-esteem is often a reason for relationship tension. It’s hard to give a partner the support they need if their need for it is excessive. Addressing feelings is vital for managing relationship anxiety.
• Controlling behavior: Much like arguing, a confrontational attitude won’t help with your relationship stress. In reality, this behavior may cause more tension between yourself and your partner and may even cause them to drift away from you emotionally. Regardless of how you may feel about that person, you should not let them overstep the boundaries of your intimacy because eventually, it will lead to relationship insecurity and, therefore, relationship-based anxiety.
• Checking your partner’s texts: Many couples with relationship anxiety do not have a strong sense of confidence. Looking through text messages behind your partner’s back is a bad idea! Instead of invading your partner’s privacy, you need to open a dialogue of honesty to ensure you both understand each other better.

Causes of Relationship Anxiety 

Anxious attachment style insecurity, problems at work, trauma from a previous relationship, and even our life habits can influence our romantic relationships. Stress and an insecure attachment style are related to mental health as well as physical reactions that could even lead to cardiovascular diseases.

• Past experiences: Perhaps the problem is not in your current relationship but stems from an experience you may have had with past relationships which made you feel insecure. Experiencing traumatic situations with a partner in the past can cause you to suffer from a relevant experience. This may lead to consequences for your current partner and intimate relationships.
• Communication skills: Poor communication skills are detrimental to almost everything else in our lives. Not understanding communication and even your partner’s words is difficult and sometimes overwhelming. Learning to have healthy conversations is crucial for understanding relationship anxiety and making you feel secure.
• Attachment styles: Attachments can form during childhood. Many adults faced abandonment when they were toddlers due to divorce and many other reasons. Because of that, as they grew up, they were prone to have a wrong perspective of a loving relationship.

How to Deal with Relationship Anxiety?

Being dependent on someone is not a bad thing. By establishing emotional connections, we create very strong bonds, so it is normal to  be affected by a partner’s actions.  However, for a relationship to be healthy, both parties must be independent. And this piece of advice is an invaluable service.

Wellness professionals with relevant medical expertise in relationship anxiety recommend couples therapy. They assure it is a good option for long-term relationships to enhance a healthy attachment, improve self-worth and fix lower self-esteem issues. Also, doctors have been recommending supplements that help to “manage settings” when it comes to our feelings and our minds. 

Working as a team will always be more effective than working separately. The most important thing to do is to have honest conversations with romantic partners. Communication is a very important thing for relationships to work.

Final Thought

Sometimes, experiencing anxiety can indicate that said relationship is not good for us and that it is hurting us. In that case, we must assess whether it is worth solving the problems affecting your relationship to overcome relationship anxiety and finally have a secure attachment style, or if it may be time to move on your own.