It was the time when I no longer craved for love when you showed up. It was the time when I have already learned to stand on my own, not longing for someone’s hand to hold. It was the time when I have finally made myself happy without depending my happiness on others, and it was the time when I no longer wished to be someone else’s one and only because I knew I had to fix myself first so I can be whole again before the right person comes.
But like a hurricane, you came so abruptly – with no warnings and no signs, just like a wind that brushed me off my feet and took me somewhere I was clearly not familiar with.
I asked the heavens above, “Is this all a coincidence? Why do we seem to weave each other’s incomplete threads in this tapestry we call ‘life’? Why do we seem to be like a jigsaw puzzle that finally became complete because we were each other’s missing piece? Please, if this is just something that heaven lent me, I want to be spared from the impending hurts and ache that I’m not fond of – I beg you, spare me from the pain that I long before ran away from.”
I was oblivious to what’s ahead – all I knew was you became the fillings in the voids inside my heart and head. You knew the right words to say, the right things to do – you knew how to lure me and I became a victim of your toxic charm.
I made myself believe that it was ‘it’ – that maybe after a long time of waiting, finally, ‘it’ came; alas, I can be happy again.
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I went along with the flow, enjoying each millisecond I spent with you.
You have no idea how beautiful you are – your eyes speak different emotions, your smile lights up a room that’s dimly lit, and your moves are so swift, you’re like dancing with the wind.
You are full of wisdom and wit – you’re the kind of person I can spend my whole life with. You’re somewhat like a gem that I wanted to keep with me as much as time allows.
I admit – I fell for you. I don’t know how but I just did. I found myself waiting for your name to appear on my screen, I turned to you whenever I felt down or grim, and when I realized it’s you who I want to share all my dreams with the moment I wake up in the morning, I knew I’ve already fallen for you – hard – so hard I landed on an unsteady ground.
But like a hurricane you came so abruptly; you caused a ruckus in my heart, you made my mind go wild, and then afterward, you left me – like nothing happened, like you never destroyed my heart and soul. You went away and left me here alone, and ever since then, I have always felt so lonely.
It wasn’t the first time I got my heart broken but with you, it felt like it was – because really, I’ve never wanted anyone as much as I wanted you, I never realized it until I cried myself to sleep because I wished I still had you.
You’re like the storm that made a significant impact on me, something no waves nor tsunamis can ever wash away. You left a scar so deep like the sea, and I know you’ll always be engraved here in me.
I wish you said ‘Good-bye’ though – to at least ease the pain you caused me.
Because the hardest goodbye is the one that is never said – no signs, no warnings – just like when the drizzle becomes a hurricane that leaves tremendous aftermath when the morning comes.