You were right to want it different

I knew you were right when you said 

“I can’t do this anymore. I need this to be different.” 

When I asked you why, what…how?

You shook your head defeated. 

It was then I realized you cut me from your story. 

I could see it clearly, in bold, in caps, in writing. 

What will ultimately heal me, will ultimately destroy you. 

Not because the world decided that’s how it has to be,

but because I decided it could be, was going to be, had to be…fuck!

I turned into your bad guy. 

I thought it would help…

I remember saying it’s my turn.

I know I said I’ll try. 

I’ll be your bad guy because every story needs one. I’ll be your bad guy because it’s what you’ve been looking for in me from the beginning. I’ll be your bad guy because you want it to heal you, mold you, expand you. I’ll be your bad guy because I love you more than anything I’ve ever loved before and you decided a long time ago that you are the captain of your ship and what you say goes. So I’ll be your bad guy. I’ll do it for you, because you want me to.

But I’ll also be your hero.

I thought it would help. 

I remember saying it’s my turn. 

I know I said I’ll try. 

I’ll be your hero because every story needs one. I’ll be your hero because it’s the last thing you’re looking for in me. I’ll be your hero because I want to help heal you, mold you, expand you. I’ll be your hero because I love you more than anything I’ve ever loved before and I decided a long time ago that you’re the captain of your ship and what you say goes. So I’ll be your hero. I’ll do it for you, because you want me to.

When we could no longer fight alone. 

I won’t let you tell me you can’t do this anymore. 

I’ll fight to make it different. 

The plan is simple, really. 

The plan is this: 

I’ll learn a different song. 

Let us decide to change our story.

Rewrite the words they said were fact,

We’ll do this because we have to.

You’ll make it yours,

I’ll make it mine. 

Instead of letting fate decide,

I won’t accept it’s chase. 

You’re healing can’t destroy me, 

it never could, it never will.

as many times as we have to,

as many times its needed. 

I’ll let what heals you get to write our story,

but not the one they want.  

I’ll watch you heal, mold, and expand into the hero you are meant to be. 

I’ll let our battle wounds scream wisdom,

force the void to shake us from its spell.

And in the chaos, the madness, the mess,

those places you heal most.

I’ll run full speed into that darkness. 

I’ll let it heal me too.

Because as of right now, 

it’s the only way things can be different. 

It’s the only way I get you. 

It’s the only way we win. 

Let the story tell: that what heals you, heals me too. 

Let them all rejoice in our plot twist . 

The plot twist they all scoffed at. 

Let it be known to all who doubted we could, 

the author we let write our story before, 

he handed us his pen. 

We wrote the story how we wanted it. 

We wrote our happy ending. 

The one that doesn’t have either of us as bad guys, 

but both of as heroes.