For a very long time, I have always seen myself as a brave person.
Someone who is strong and resilient.
Someone who could break the barrier.
Someone who would walk through the fog.
Someone who never fails to see the light even in darker days.
Have I been this brave all along? No.
Some days I feel like crying all the time and have no power to keep on going.
Some days I feel scared to move on.
Some days I feel like I could never dream again.
Some days are harder than the others, and that’s okay.
On those tough days when all the colors are gone and what left is only blue, here’s a message I wish to remember and I hope this will help you too:
This is not the part where your story ends.
This is the part where you learn that it’s okay to feel everything you are feeling right now.
This is the part where you grow from the pain and gain a new power as you heal.
This is the part where you gain strength as you learn to accept your weakness.
This is the part where you learn that it’s okay to be vulnerable.
This is not the time to forget all of your struggles.
This is the time to look back and realize how far you have come.
This is the time to hug the person inside of you and say, “You did great. You’re amazing. Keep on going.”
This is the time to dust off that vision board filled with dreams and watch them come true one dream at a time before your very own eyes.
This is the time to believe in yourself and take that step you’ve been holding back for a while.
You won’t be doing this alone.
Your five years old self is looking up to you, believing all the things that you can do.
Your nineteen years old self is celebrating your presence as the wonderful life you have right now is beyond what she can imagine.
Your future self is praying for you to be brave even though you are scared, wishing you to have faith even if hope is the only thing you have left.
You were never alone this whole time.
The universe is with you all along.
In places that comforts your soul.
In birds who sing a ballad of hope in the morning.
In the stars, you have shared your secrets within the night.
In people who love you in silence.
In loved ones who have always shown you what your presence means to their world, in many ways possible.
In your breath and in your veins, as you wake up every morning and rest all through the night.
Even if one day you feel lonely in this struggle, remember that your light is needed in this world.
I wish you could see how your smile could light up a room.
I wish you could see how your text could brighten up a day.
I wish you could see how your hug could warm even the coldest heart.
I wish you could see how your words could open a door to a world full of wonders.
I wish you could see how your story could light up hope.
I wish you could understand how your presence matters.
Your presence really does matter. Oh, how I wish I could state this in bold letters and pass it on to the rest of the world. Because I know how much it could mean to hear that when you need it most. It could feel like a fog has lifted and you can finally see clearly. It could feel like a light is shining for you to light up your way. It could feel like a warm embrace saying, “I love you. Thank you for being here.” And that would be the best thing to hear on any day.
I hear it often, but one day when I was not feeling my best my mother said what she always says, “Lucky to have you here. What would my life be without you…” and it lifts all of my worries away.
So today I want to pass this on to you:
I love you. Thank you for being here. Please don’t give up.
-By Naomi Karsudjono
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