Honey, I shrunk my heart chakra

The heart chakra is said to be the most significant of all seven chakras, it’s the epicenter of all love and compassion. Chakra in Sanskrit translates into a wheel. The chakras are the spinning energy centers of our body and each chakra is related to different energies and has different functions. A lot of the spiritual practices and meditation we do is to expand our heart chakra ultimately. And most of the times when we go through a spiritual awakening, we can feel it opening up and the divine energy overflowing like River Ganga. But like everything else, if not practiced mindfully, even the expansion of heart chakra can get really tricky.

Two years ago, I was going through a spiritual awakening. I didn’t have a care in the world. The things that I used to enjoy – smoking, drinking, clubbing…all that ceased to interest me any longer. I felt weighed down by my possessions, job and even by my relationships with the people around. I would feel all the emotions to the fullest and any feeling was too overwhelming. Ironically, the hardcore foodie that I was, lost appetite and despite being a major carnivore, I was disgusted by even the very sight of non-vegetarian food. Only vegetables, fruits and greens would make me full and contented. My sensitivities, taste and smell were enhanced and that made me averse to any kind of packaged food or beverages with preservatives or chemicals. Clairvoyance and lucid dreaming became frequent occurrences and I had new ways of seeing.

I quit my job on a whim and would go to a park, sit there whole day just watching people and smiling at them. Oblivion became the state of mind. I know, it sounds very Eckart Tolle-ish but I didn’t know anything about him back then. I would sing Sufi songs at the top of my lungs, in the middle of the night, much to the annoyance and amusement of my roomies. Because unfortunately, the divine had chosen to come over me at those odd hours. The sarcasm apart, the point I’m trying to make here is that awakening is fine, but balance is really important.

While commuting in the busy Mumbai local trains where everybody fights tooth and nail for an inch of space, I’d wholeheartedly offer my seat to anyone and everyone, and not just seniors or pregnant women/mothers, for no reason. I was becoming more “giving”, only I didn’t have much to give.

There was a particular incident where one of the girls I used to live with asked for my Credit Card and bank details so that she could buy the new iPhone 6s. She wasn’t happy with her current iPhone 4 and neither did she want to ask her rich, globetrotting dad. My heart chakra being as big as the galaxy, I wanted to do everything possible to keep this 19 year old happy. But I was moving to another house in a week and her college was over, so the chances of us meeting again wee pretty slim. Even then, there I was with her in the store, about to buy her the phone on a monthly installment basis with my credit card ignoring the risk involved. We were asked to come next day as we weren’t carrying all the required documents. When we got back home, I didn’t feel quite right about it. So I told her ‘NO’. The events that followed later proved that she wouldn’t have paid me back as she promised and I was only glad that I went with my gut feeling.

All these while I didn’t know what was happening to me, why I’ve become more giving and forgiving until an intern who has been practicing energy therapies from childhood told me that he can feel my heart chakra and it’s a lot bigger than usual. The imbalance of chakras can lead to many physical and mental health issues as well. Then it all made sense to me, all the troubles I’ve been going through.

When your heart chakra expands, you tend to see the world through rose-tinted glasses and that could turn all your thoughts and actions irrational.

So if you have a wide open heart chakra, and an extreme sense of compassion or love takes over you every time, please know this – you cannot be compassionate without being self- compassionate. Make sure all your actions are guided by ‘LOGIC’ as well. Before you do anyone a favour, ask yourself – is it beyond my capability? Do I have to do this? Know that not everyone around feels the same way as you do and you don’t have to feel guilty about not giving. Remember, you owe yourself some kindness and love too. So honey, let your heart chakra shrink a bit, kindly?