Zodiac Signs As Criminals
Aries – Pickpocket
Taurus – Drug Dealer
Gemini – Burglar
Cancer – Fraud
Leo – Hacker
Virgo – Cult Leader
Libra – Stalker
Scorpio – Con Artist
Sagittarius – Murderer
Capricorn – Assassin
Aquarius – Money Laundering
Pisces – Violent Protest Leader
Feels like an outsider among
ARIES: People having a conversation using their inside voices
TAURUS: The crowds rushing past them on the sidewalk while they stroll and take in their surroundings
GEMINI: People who don’t have a favorite philosophical movement
CANCER: Their peers who prefer dating apps to real-life connections
LEO: High school classmates who chose to stay in their hometown instead of moving to the big city and becoming the main character
VIRGO: People
Likes you for your
ARIES: Bad habits
TAURUS: Aesthetic
GEMINI: Chaotic side
CANCER: Flaws they think they can fix
LEO: Reputation
VIRGO: Emotional maturity
LIBRA: Fantasy self that lives inside their head
SCORPIO: Similarities
SAGITTARIUS: Secret knowledge
CAPRICORN: Stability
AQUARIUS: Brain
PISCES: Aur
What makes you seethe
ARIES: Having things you already understand explained to you
TAURUS: Public restrooms with no hand dryer or paper towels
GEMINI: Listening to podcast hosts try to remember the name of something and not being able to chime in even though you know
CANCER: People who choose to be unkind to others
LEO: Watching your friends settle for less than they deserve
VIRGO: Seeing people get rewarded for breaking the rules
LIBRA: Bein
Lies they tell themselves
ARIES: “I don’t need anyone”
TAURUS: “I’ll do it tomorrow”
GEMINI: “I meant it as a joke”
CANCER: “Things were better the way they used to be”
LEO: “They’re just jealous”
VIRGO: “If they don’t check every single box, then they’re not worth my time”
LIBRA: “If they don’t respond in ten minutes, then they’ve forgotten about me”
SCORPIO: “I didn’t care anyway”
Doesn’t want to hear your
ARIES: Overdue apology
TAURUS: Whining about the same thing again
GEMINI: Poignant silence
CANCER: Ex’s name
LEO: Play-by-play recap of your day
VIRGO: Music playing out loud on the train
LIBRA: Empty promises
SCORPIO: Weak excuses
SAGITTARIUS: Secrets they can’t tell
CAPRICORN: Excessive praise
Even more than a Gemini
ARIES: Chaotic things they’ve done for the plot
TAURUS: Hills they’ll die on
GEMINI: …
CANCER: Hot and cold
LEO: Minutes spent dominating the conversation
VIRGO: Turned on by intellectual rivalry
LIBRA: Likely to steal your personality and your partner
SCORPIO: Burner accounts
SAGITTARIUS: Layers of irony on their dating app profile
CAPRICORN: Unread books on th
Experimenting
ARIES: Timing whether it’s more efficient to run up the stairs on all fours
TAURUS: Fermenting random foods and seeing what happens
GEMINI: Monitoring how much their heart rate increases while texting different crushes
CANCER: Testing whether they sleep better with or without Lana Del Rey instrumentals playing
LEO: Doing elongation stretches to help them reach runway model height
VIRGO: Practicing dexterity by picking up things with their toes
LIB
Leave a Reply
You must be logged in to post a comment.