It took me years
To realize what a beautiful and rare person you were.
I tried to come back and beg for five minutes to tell you,
How much I miss the smile on your lips,
How I miss the gentleness of your kiss,
How I miss the words spoken from your heart,
How I miss you- as a person and the lover I lost and never seem to find anywhere else.
But, something in me holds me back from reaching out.
You are not the same person that I left.
Time has mended you and curved a goddess in its wake.
Everything that I loved about you has changed and
Metastasized into a person larger than life;
Magnificent and intense in the way they approach life, love and everything in between.
I fear I will be consumed by you this time around,
And swallowed whole in your hurricane, that I will baptize your name.
So I look at you from afar,
And hope you get the apology that I will never get the courage to utter in person:
‘I’m sorry for breaking your heart’
For now, mine is breaking too as I never seem to find another you anywhere.