How Much I Miss You

How Much I Miss You

It took me years

To realize what a beautiful and rare person you were.

I tried to come back and beg for five minutes to tell you,

How much I miss the smile on your lips,

How I miss the gentleness of your kiss,

How I miss the words spoken from your heart,

How I miss you- as a person and the lover I lost and never seem to find anywhere else.

But, something in me holds me back from reaching out.

You are not the same person that I left.

Time has mended you and curved a goddess in its wake.

Everything that I loved about you has changed and

Metastasized into a person larger than life;

Magnificent and intense in the way they approach life, love and everything in between.

I fear I will be consumed by you this time around,

And swallowed whole in your hurricane, that I will baptize your name.

So I look at you from afar,

And hope you get the apology that I will never get the courage to utter in person:

‘I’m sorry for breaking your heart’

For now, mine is breaking too as I  never seem to find another you anywhere.

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