How narcissists gain control of their victim. These relationships are insane. They are expert manipulators, They do it so methodically that you don’t even see it is happening. They know how to break you down and destroy everything that is you. It’s almost as if, you are being erased. You start to feel like you lost yourself. You don’t even know that it is happening, all you know is you are increasingly feeling confused, and you don’t know what you are doing anymore. You are overwhelmed, nothing makes sense, and you feel like you lost your spirit. They groom you to accept the abuse bit by bit. Little by little everything becomes more and more about them, and you become less and less you, and more subservient to their requests. This is done on purpose to gain control of you. They don’t want you to feel good about yourself, then you will leave them, and then they won’t have access to their narcissistic supply. It is difficult to accept but they do it on purpose. This is the way they work. They are not looking to love you, they are looking to control you.
– Maria Consiglio