22 Stages of Relationship Between An Empath and A Narcissist

22 Stages of Relationship Between An Empath and A Narcissist

12. The empath gets confused.

Why they have meted out such behavior, is beyond their understanding. They start blaming themselves and wonder if they are at all worthy of being loved by anyone at all.

13. At this point, the empath is not able to understand that they are just being manipulated.

Their partner has bent everything around them to create a twisted view of the circumstances. There can be anything around them to let them know the truth that they are the one who is “right” and it’s their partner who is tremendously “wrong” and wicked.

14. The empath will try to communicate with the narcissist in all truthfulness.

The narcissist will, however, justify their behavior and pass the blame.

15. It is normal to feel lost, confused and hurt.

But despite all the heart-break, the empath will need to be calm and do some self-evaluation to figure out how they became so defenseless. This is how they will start transforming.

16. The empath will know that they are by nature healers.

They have the inner strength to help others in the right ways, sometimes as a duty and sometimes when life brings them to such situations.

17. The empath has to realize the bitter truth that not everyone deserves their love, care, and affection.

Not everyone who seems distressed and unhappy is revealing their true self. There are some people who have sinister motives and have a very different outlook towards relationships and people than they do. Not everyone they fall in love with can be trusted so quickly.

Are you trying to move on from narcissistic abuse? Read Healing From Narcissistic Abuse: Here’s How To Get Started 

18. In this situation, the empath must realize that they too are in a very bad situation something of which the narcissist in their life always spoke of.

But, in their case, it would be different. They would make positive efforts and heal themselves. The narcissist will not.

19. For an empath, this will be a painful awakening.

They will learn from the experience to move ahead.

20. The narcissist will continue as if nothing happened and they are completely innocent.

They won’t remember for a moment that someone loved them so deeply and intensely. They won’t remember the powerful bond they once had with someone and just move on to find it somewhere else. A time will come when they will know they can neither connect with themselves nor with other people.

21. The narcissist will move on.

In time they will find another victim.

22. The empath will be stronger, wiser and be more cautious about who they time, affection and love.

Even though the relationship might have been an incredibly traumatic and painful one, an empath can see it as a lesson. They will now know what they don’t want and what is acceptable and what is not. This will further help them be in happier and more normal relationships.

Empaths are extremely strong individuals, and narcissists are equally weak. Even though healing from narcissistic abuse is a long process, it can turn an empath’s life for the better and help them live their best lives.

If you want to know more about the relationship between an empath and a narcissist, check out this video below:

22 Stages of Relationship Between An Empath and A Narcissist
22 Stages of Relationship Between An Empath and A Narcissist

89 thoughts on “22 Stages of Relationship Between An Empath and A Narcissist”

  1. Great article!!!! Yes, this has been my experience…

    Watch Black Money on Netflix. 200 episodes… it’ll be a new experience but very addictive. Turkish! Intense relationships and personal development.

  2. I came into my Narissistic man’s like 6 years ago. I knew right away that he was not what I was looking for, but I thought I could change him if I loved him enough. What I found is he changed me, some for the better and some for the worse. I started this relationship on the Internet and I have decided, that is not the place to begin a relationship as I did not see him. He spoke words and they were beautiful words, but he also spoke words not so nice. He was a gentleman in disguise. He can be sweet, and yet he can also be a mean person. What I found is the things I love and cherish were not important, only his ideas where worth holding onto, especially in the area of sex. Also I never seemed to have a good idea and therefore it had to be changed to satifiy him. He was happy in front of a TV, unless he wanted sex. He seems his life rotated around sex, and I had to schedule a time for sex at a convient time. I only knew the word Naracissit a few years ago, but in the last 4 months I have discovered a whole new world. What I am discovering is that I am a Empath whick is just as wrong. My Empath started in childhood with Alcholic parents, and trying to please them, and then it broadened to the rest of the world. Do I want this knowledge? What will I do with this knowledge? I saw the RED flag but ignored it as I wanted to be loved. How I pray that I will see these read flags and deal with them at the very beginning. If you do not know RC Blake, may I suggest you watch his videos.

  3. Almost! In the case of a true empath, we know the lies, we feel the bullshit, we hear all the right words, on repeat, but our instincts tells us all. We are caring towards everyone, getting taken advantage of always but make no mistake, we know exactly whats happening and every now and then, theres a rebellious badass and over thinker, who has her own agenda. That being to call him out on every single lie, allowing him to get away with nothing. As of now, the game is still being played. My goal is to strip him down to humility
    Getting him away from his reflection, so to speak. Let ya know how it turns out.

  4. I walked away from someone who I believe was a narcissist. Each day I cater to him, cooked, helped him aprt his life, his bills. He blamed me for everything and states he left me. It was him who cheated, used me and belittled me. He was physically abusive and acted like a big kid.
    We share a baby and he has not provided one single thing for this baby since he left. He does not call or visit or provide anything. A year has past and he moved on to a new supply and has impregnated her within 4 months. He is infatuated with her and tells me I am miserable.

    He is a sick being who took my kindness and love for for his selfish needs and then walked away like we were nothing and said I was a waste of his time.

    1. Good luck Leeanne! Remember that life works in mysterious ways, one day you’ll be healed and you’ll feel so joyful that remembering this time will be like trying to remember how it was to be a little sick when you’re healthy. Very hard, not very interesting, and most of all, not at all endangering what will then be your current state! Keep your eyes on the horizon and don’t worry about how much time passed or not. It’s all worth it.

    2. I found out 8 years ago my husband ( the narcissist) was having an affair. I put up with it, believing he would see how bad it was hurting me, it never happened.
      It was one skank right after another. Parading them in my face, my home, without care or concern.
      He finally left a few months ago. I thought I was going to be a wreck.
      I wasn’t. And now I keep asking myself why he didn’t do it sooner.
      Point is, I’m healing and learning to live life on my terms, for me. I don’t miss him and don’t even dwell on the good times.
      We were married 18 years. I’m going to live.
      But now I’m much stronger and smarter.
      It WON’T happen again.

  5. I find this post misleading. I’ve had a narcissistic abusive father, so I know a bit about this from experience. And I have considered myself to be empath in the past, and have thought about the topic a lot. Once I started actually studying psychology, I found out how ridiculous the term really is, but that’s another story.
    This post paints such an overly simplified picture of the situation that it almost achieves the level of fairy tale in its form. What I particularly don’t like is how it portrays the “empath” as being purely good, and the narcissist as being purely evil. I imagine this was written by someone who considers themselves empath. Easy way to make you feel good about yourself by putting yourself on the moral high ground and blame the other for everything. But harmlessness does not equal virtue.
    I estimate that a significant amount of the people who considers themselves empaths are in actuality just naïve, which makes it very easy to be unconditionally loving, because that is one of the reasons why children are.
    The reason I wrote this is because falsehood, especially those that tend to glorify oneself and demonize others, are dangerous, for all.

  6. Barbara McDonald

    Almost 3 yrs. in and worked my butt off helping plus running all errands, cooking thousands of homemade meals. He does not talk and stonewalls consistently. I became afraid. I could not ask for him to hear me out. He shut me out unless it was about him. And very cold. Total opposite of when we met and he love bombed me with lies. This was Trauma Bonding. I am outta here. No looking back.

    1. I totally know how you felt 5 years for me. I felt like a door matt and so used, free from him for 2 months and still feel awful, I hope it soon gets better.

  7. Those stage are the key to understanding and avoiding the narcs. Read something similar a year ago and it felt like a revelation. Since left my pervert narc of 28 years. Met another one and recognised his game immediately, The good news is that my voicing out was so uncomfortable to him he couldn’t keep up the control and revealed even more of himself. This was a challenge I set myself after 28 long years of silence, could simply voicing out the clear narc traits drive them away like garlic to vampires.It worked for me and boosted my confidence in my very own narc radar. Won’t play with narcfire again though!!

  8. I have just ended a relationship with a Narracist. I am an Empath. It was great at first until I didnt have money for his drug addiction. He started calling an ex lover to come take him and she paid for it. He got into a treatment center and I paid for all of that because he wont work. I worked and he went off with his female friend ans stayed 2 ir more days at a time each time. He went out of town and stayed with his friend i still dont know who. I never said anything just got my things one morning when he was gone and moved out. I was the worst person ever. I left him. He need to get to treatment. Blah blah. He moved his female friend in to get him back and forth to treatment center and we continued having a relationship for months until she moved out. I was giving him so much money i was suffering but i loved him. I moved back in and after about 2 weeks the picking at me to get a response to which he would run out and say she crazy. Yelling for no reason. To his family. He even called the police one day and purposley scratxhed his back up and said i did it and i almost went to jail. I knew i had to get away. He started wiyh me again on a sunday and i just jumped up packed my things and left. He refused to let me come back. Which was a blessing. I caught him cheating 2 weeks later and ended things. He tells everyone he ended things but i dont care i am away and done. So thankful

  9. Beautifully stated facts about the truths of a toxic relationship between an empath and a narcissist this helped tremendously so thank you very much

  10. My ‘just recently finished’ relationship to a T!!!!! What a nightmare!! 3 months was enough for me, I am so thankful to be out of it.

  11. Narcissists are everywhere, female, male and from every culture. In a sense, everyone is a bit of a narcissist but it’s the deep narcissist you need to watch out for. I was married to a deep narcissist for 20 years and never knew the extent until I read this article. She has found her new victim and I am finally happy now without that in my life. If you are in a relationship with a deep narcissist the only way to survive is to end it. There is no cure, I found out the hard way but it is never too late to live again. Good luck!

  12. Very accurate article .. They are one of the worst types of personalities , and unfortunately America is filled with them . However , + note is without the Narcissist the Empath wouldn’t understand its own self worth and value . They do serve a purpose , but just do NOT let the damage get to deep. They are not mentally stable individuals , who live in alternative realities. This stems from a lack of Self love from the parents or not marrying for love , in which their children become a false extension of themselves.

  13. I have to say, this article is pretty darn accurate. I am so thankful to be out of that horrible relationship and have moved on to a very healthy one. I wish all those who have been through this experience, the time to heal yourself and not to let that happen again. Remember you are worth it!

  14. You guys might want to look into this….


    It’s WAYYYYYY too closely worded to this one. That author is not crediting you guys. Instead, she’s rewording it and calling it her own. It resembles this article too closely.

  15. I am beyond overwhelmed at this moment…I feel so, so, so stupid. I have been married to oh most definitely a narcissist and the Father of Lies for 27&1/2 years now. And yes, I have only recently gained knowledge about Empath’s after meeting one who asked me if I was also an Empath…Wow, I had never imagined…I’ve been made to feel…and therefore felt that I was just plain out crazy. I have only recently been occasionally searching for information and the cruelty I’ve been experiencing from my husband lately is what provoked more interest. When I saw this article I thought “NO WAY!!!” I have actually been advising my husband recently that I believe him to be a Sociopath…hmmm…he truly hates to hear that. I always thought the reason I was so unhappy was because I was super~sensitive…Of course I overlooked his many cheating episodes to save our marriage. I grew up in a broken home and did not want this for our boys.
    I don’t know….something inside me is raging now and I am not willing to take his cruelty one week and telling me I’m his girl and it would kill him to lose me the next week.
    To make matters worse, we lost our oldest son, Timothy, age:22 to a tragic accident in Lehigh County, PA on 7/21/2014 when he and a co-worker were struck and killed by a train….
    I have struggled with addiction problems since my teens and had a long period of sobriety….needless to say that is over and I now am getting ready to enter yet another rehab facility…and of course, I’m the bad guy now….but I continue to advise him that I do not know if I am returning to him when treatment is over and he totally ignores me or tells me to shut up shut up shut up.
    I continue asking myself how could I have given this man 30 years of my life…my youth…when he never gets better as I always assumed (makes an ass out of you and me) he would…ie: I thought that this would be “my” time…a time when I would be loved and finally experience peace in this marriage. I’ve been so naive and I feel so very sick over it….which of course I now realized fueled my former and current addiction~with my son’s death being used as an excuse. I have no idea where to turn now at this point, but I do know that I am going to continue researching…As I’ve read about most Empaths…I’ve certainly had my share of pain so far in my almost 49 years…I mourn my youth and only hope that I make the right decisions for my future. Thank You for Sharing!!!

  16. I hate to say this for the sake I do not wish this pain on anyone but I am so grateful to read in these comments that there are others out there that understand what being in love with the evil narcissist is like. I envy you for having the strength to not answer his accidental call nor return the call. Know matter how much I am aware of what the relationship really is or who he truly is , I end up giving in and eventually answering. Even when I despise who he is. It is like I can’t stand that I can’t fix him or be enough to change him. In my heart , I know it isn’t possible and to be honest I really don’t want a life with him if I could after all he has done to me so why can’t I let go. I don’t get that. Sometimes I think I just wanting the opportunity to hurt him back knowing that not possible either but I’ve tried to look at why from every possible direction.

  17. This is very accurate. Im at stage 15 right now. We were on again off again for two years and every time I went back, he broke down my defenses. I knew something wasn’t right with him when we went on our first date but I didn’t trust myself and didn’t realize his narcissistic tactics. I figured him out but kept going back hoping that he would change. What was really going on was that I was in denial because I really loved him and I didn’t want to be right about him. I didn’t want to see that he really didn’t care about me or love me. I wanted to believe him when he said he cared and respected me. I trusted his words more than my own feelings. He “accidentally” called me the other day and I didn’t answer. Nor did I call back. I don’t plan on it. What I need is the strength to let go and move on. I had a vision one night while I was laying in bed with him of him killing me. For so long I have been taught that there was something wrong with me because of my ability to feel things on a deep and profound level, but I am coming to accept that I am an empath. I am a healer and there is nothing wrong with me. I am also learning that I DO NOT have to love, care for, give my time to, or help anyone that I do not wish to and that taking care of and protecting myself is NOT selfish. I am very happy I found this article. I feel very lonely sometimes because it seems like no one understands me but I know there are others out there like me and I am excited to meet them one day. I ask for strength.

    1. I have just wasted 5 years of my life with a charming, manipulative narcissist. I also returned to the relationship time and time again believing that we had a ‘special’ bond. I actually convinced myself that the love and faith I put into the relationship was reciprocated. He does ‘love’ me but now I know that this means different things to different people. A narcissist does not comprehend that respect, honesty, care and loyalty are all essential.
      I am angry with myself for pouring all my love into a bottomless vessel. I have felt depleted, worthless and empty.
      I am trying hard not to feel ‘selfish’ now that I understand MY wellbeing should be my priority. Continually putting someone else’s needs and wants first is the path to self destruction.
      I am sometimes lonely but it beats being miserable. You cannot change a narcissist. A leopard cannot change it’s spots. It can camouflage itself so you let down your defences. Never again will I allow anyone to use and abuse me.

  18. The smartest narcissists target gorgeous women and keep the act up for the life of the marriage.

    Thinking through the 22 stages, one might prepare a life-mate by breaking her heart once or twice prior. That will result in her being less idealistic and more accepting of your preferred behavior (such as dalliances outside marriage).

      1. Wow, that is pretty accurate, mine cheated on me with one of his exes before we got married, I was pregnant with my eldest he cheated again with her, after we got married it just continued with other women, also while I was pregnant with my second son, half I don’t even know about but those that I know about were less attractive than me, at least that is what people that had seen or knew them said. Almost 21 years of marriage and 25years together he finally leaves me and relieves me of my hell and to this day I don’t really even know what she looks like because she is French and the live in Malta. two days before he finally ended it we will still making plans for the future and boom. Now I am the abuser according to him, he always wanted me to lose weight even if I was on my ideal weight, I eventually didn’t care anymore. Now I am happy, I never thought I would be able to move on I believed that that was what life was about, being in a constant state of fear that your partner will leave you at anytime if you don’t keep them happy at all times.

  19. Oh…My..gosh… This sooo describes my on-and-off 3 year relationship with my “psycho ex.” I’ve known for years that I’m an empath, didn’t realize that that he was a narcissist/sociopath (like my father, ironically enough) until too late. He was obsessive, controlling & jealous, as well as wounded, and I interpreted it as loving, and that I could “help” him. I NEVER thought I would get into an abusive relationship (mentally, verbally – even involving my family & friends!) until I was. Thank you for shedding light on this situation.

  20. most of my closest friends and family are narcissists, my sister Nawel used to tell me “you attract them because you are an empath ” hope it is not true, because they say that a narcissist tend to absorb all people’s energy

    1. they are probably narcissists to different limits, not all the same, the problem is, you are the empath!! empaths are so nice & sweet & they genuinely feel for other, usually, those others would abuse that fact … that’s why empaths usually, feel alone .. like they belong to themselves, its sad, hard, and very depressing sometimes..!

  21. A lot of truth in this. Those who are happy with themselves and not in competition trust far too quickly that others are the same and have their best interests at heart. This should never be assumed.

    1. I do.. ive broken up with my bf after too much drama and control and mind bullying. I recognise this read. But i do know he was younger than me.. just a man who needs to grow and mature and perhaps find that empathy he lacks at this moment in time

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