Whom are you working for? Is the person worth your time and energy? Are you sure if you should support your leader or manager? Here are below 10 questions that will help you identify and make some powerful decisions on what you need to do.
For 15 years, I’ve been coaching mid- to high-level professionals and leaders in achieving their highest and most rewarding goals. This involves helping them embrace new strategies and approaches that allow them to make a positive impact they long for and become the kind of leaders they want to be.
Throughout the process, they’ve told me that in overcoming their own power gaps, they’ve expanded their ability to learn from critique and found new ways to be more inclusive in their leadership approach. They’ve built more psychological safety in their organizations and reduced the divisiveness and conflict in their ecosystems and work cultures.
It’s very inspiring to observe people mustering the bravery, confidence, and strength to walk through their deepest fears and insecurities. I’ve learned in my time as a therapist and coach that “greater awareness equals greater choice,” and these individuals are intentionally choosing to shift how they’re operating in the world to become leaders of beneficial influence, who uplift and support their followers, employees and constituents as they ascend.
Sometimes, in working with professionals around the world, I also see that they are struggling with their decision-making processes, unable to make a definitive decision on a direction to pursue or action to take.
In many cases, their decision processes have failed them in the past—for instance, they’ve taken the wrong career route, or chosen a terrible job, or followed the wrong leader who wreaked havoc on their life. And these faulty decisions make them feel paralyzed today as to what to do next. Or they haven’t ever really trusted themselves fully so they waffle and waver when needing to put their stake in the ground and decide on a course of action.
Overall, I’ve seen that there are 5 key reasons that people’s decisions fail them, and these reasons are:
- Their decisions don’t support their intrinsic, core values
- They made the right decisions but due to weak boundaries or insecurity, they didn’t communicate or enforce their decisions with clarity or commitment.
- Their decisions emerged from a place of disempowerment, fear or weakness instead of strength
- Their decisions weren’t sufficiently vetted and didn’t take into account the real-life impact and outcomes
- And finally, their decisions focused on the wrong problem instead of the key challenge they actually needed to address
Today, in these times of greater fear and uncertainty, I’m observing that my clients and course members—and those I hear from on LinkedIn on other social media platforms—are struggling even more in making key decisions that will have a large impact on their futures, including what jobs they should stay in, the career changes they need to make, and now, who they want to vote for in the upcoming local and national elections. These key decisions include which business or political leaders to follow, which organizations to join and which causes and directions to pursue.
In figuring out—and committing to— a vitally important decision that you’ll have to live with for the foreseeable future, that will have lasting repercussions in your life and the lives of those you love, I’ve found there are some key questions you can ask yourself today that will help you make the right decision for you.
These questions will help you cut through the noise and clutter, clarify where you really stand, and help you make the correct choice for who you are, focusing on the issues you care about, and the outcomes that matter most to you in your life and work. And these questions will help you not only choose the leader you want to follow, but also determine the way you want to show up in the world.
As a start, below are 10 questions that will help you identify if a particular leader or manager is truly someone you should be supporting and working for (or voting for):
Ask yourself these 10 questions:
1. Does this leader or manager behave, communicate and operate in a way that I respect, admire and want to emulate?
2. Does this leader share my core values and inspire me to be the best, highest version of myself possible, or do I find that their actions and suggestions make me behave and speak like a “lower,” more insecure version of myself?
3. Does this leader know how to build beneficial, supportive relationships with others that help create sustainable growth and achieve critical allyship that is so necessary for my organization or entity to thrive?