“Pain is a pesky part of being human, I’ve learned it feels like a stab wound to the heart, something I wish we could all do without, in our lives here. Pain is a sudden hurt that can’t be escaped.
But then I have also learned that because of pain, I can feel the beauty, tenderness, and freedom of healing. Pain feels like a fast stab wound to the heart. But then healing feels like the wind against your face when you are spreading your wings and flying through the air! We may not have wings growing out of our backs, but healing is the closest thing that will give us that wind against our faces.” ― C. JoyBell C.
How would you describe your relationship with yourself? Is it a kind, compassionate, and nurturing one or does it encompass a critical voice? It is important we understand the way we treat ourselves because it impacts how we relate to others. I realize many people have been hurt, whether it be through childhood wounds or intimate relationships. We have all experienced pain and suffering at some point.
However, this shouldn’t mean we carry our emotional wounds around and unload them on others. Whilst we may not have consented to the experience that caused us pain, it is incumbent on us to heal the wounds and find our way back to wholeness.
Life is not fair at the best of times, yet if we buy into this narrative, we are bound to lose hope. It is better we see life as a process where good things happen and sometimes unfortunate things happen. I’m not convinced life is out to get us. However, in my early 20s, I was certain it was, since unpleasant experiences seemed like I was being punished. It wasn’t until my early 30s I realized it was my thoughts that regulated how I interacted with life.
That is to say, the wisdom of the years has taught me that life is impartial and my thinking determines my outlook. I am the tuning fork and life echoes back the experience of my thoughts. Ever since then, I have become attentive to my surroundings and inner world.
For example, if I’m ruminating on something negative, I will see evidence of this in my waking life, such as repeated TV commercials about what I am focusing on. I am attentive to it and snap out of it quickly. Have you noticed this in your life? Do you observe your surroundings and pay attention to your inner world such as your dreams?
The point I wish to make is that healing is an inside-out job. It begins by nurturing our thoughts with what we want to show up in our life. What we believe at a deeper level becomes our destiny, whether we like it or not. We are not victims given the deeper meaning behind every experience that teaches us valuable lessons. I see life as one giant mirror and we are the architects and creators of our reality.
What we call a deleterious experience is the universe shining a light on our thoughts. I know this may sound insensitive but the universe doesn’t care what we think about. The universe is aligned with fundamental laws and when we abide by them, the circumstances of our life flow like a stream. We create every experience through our thoughts. Therefore, if we wish to heal the past, we ought to concede that nothing is an accident but results from our thinking. Is this an idea you are willing to embrace? Irrespective of your life’s experience up till now, are you willing to give life a chance?