What It Feels Like To Break Up With A Narcissist


Feels Like To Break Up With A Narcissist

It indeed feels suffocating to be in a relationship with a narcissist whose only concern is ‘Me’ and there is hardly any ‘You’ in that particular relationship. Quite obviously, this sort of relationship has an inevitable end and that is – break-up.

However, there are several implications of these relationships that keep haunting the second person in many ways even after the break-up.

Here are some of the most common emotional upheavals that the ex-partner of a Narcissist goes through after break-up along with some tips and tricks to deal with the same:

1. Obsession with one’s own self.

The main emotion related to a Narcissist is too much obsession with one’s own self.

This often leads to judging his or her partner all the time, which is indeed frustrating for the partner. Nevertheless, this might keep coming back as a menacing memory post-break-up as well and one cannot come out of the phase easily. In such cases, it is wise to remind the mind that there is no existence of the Narcissist anymore and the sooner one realizes that and moves on, the better. Usually, as per experts, three months is the average time that a partner requires after break up to be completely forgetful of the Narcissist.

Related: 3 Sneaky And Scary Breakup Tactics Of A Narcissist

2. Never-ending abuses

Another major shortcoming of a Narcissist partner is facing the never-ending abuses followed by subsequent excuses that lead to a rationalization of behaviour by the other partner and what’s more irritating –

This never seems to stop and goes on and on. Even after a break-up, the habit of rationalization does not leave the other partner who remains strangled within these emotions. The one and the only way to break free from all is to maintain absolutely ‘zero’ contact with the nasty ‘Narcissist’.

3. Fault-finding and blaming

A Narcissist partner will always be fault-finding with the other partner who will have to bear the brunt of bundles of banes owing to the constant nagging of the Narcissist.

Due to the overflowing self-praise and simultaneously, looking down upon the partner will make the other person feel down and anxious. This can be related to having sex also because the Narcissist may get judgmental regarding this too. Evidently, each of these tantrums stops after break-up although thoughts do not. In order to thwart the thoughts from coming, it is advisable by experts to practice Yoga, deep breathing, exercising, aerobics, swimming or in short, engaging in anything every day.

Related: 12 Signs You’re Emotionally Traumatized By A Hurtful Breakup

4. The sudden absence of everything 

After undergoing through continuous comments from the ‘all-perfect; Narcissist regarding loopholes, the break-up can lead to a sudden absence of everything no matter how disgusting they were.

It may be weird to hear but this really happens because one get accustomed to a kind or way of living and a sudden stoppage can feel odd and even monotonous because the excitement will not be there. However, there are ways to battle these too with so many interesting and exhilarating activities to do nowadays that includes hanging out or chilling out with friends as well. Life is completely free to be lived to the maximum possible extent. What more can one need to be happy!

5. Ashamed of staying in a relationship

One can even go to the extent of feeling ashamed of staying in a relationship with someone as nauseating as a ‘Narcissist’.

This can even make him or her feel extremely immature, dim-witted and a complete worthless who did not have the minimum common sense or logic to choose a partner wisely and simple fooled around throughout the time of relationship. However, it is time to calm down and understand that ‘to err is human’ and a Narcissist has the quality of seducing anybody with his or her charm. Anyone can fall into a false trap and learn from mistakes. There is no big deal with that!

Related: 8 Things To Expect When You Break Up With A Narcissist

6. Self-doubt after break up with a narcissist

The most sickening part is self-doubt and this occurs due to the repeated thrashings of the Narcissist partner whose only job was to complain incessantly.

There was scarcely any appreciation or applauds in the whole duration of a relationship and nothing can be more disheartening than this because this leads to lower self-esteem, lack of confidence and escalating amount of insecurity in life that does not stop even after a break-up as well. If one can really feel difficult to be free from this extreme negativity, then it is better to go for counselling programs, self-help programs and therapies so that it becomes simpler to soothe oneself.

7. Narcissist partners making out with the other partner

Narcissist partners have a tendency to indulge in more of making out with the other partner just as a part of the enjoyment and exercising power over the other.

There is barely any softer emotions like love and affection involved here. The intensity and magnitude of sex may be so much that this may make the other partner feel hollow and vapid after a break-up but one must combat this thought by believing the fact that there was an absolute absence of empathy and compassion in those days and it is time to re-adapt the milder human emotions once again.

8. Find another partner immediately after a break-up

The Narcissist will invariably find another partner immediately after a break-up because the ‘want’ or rather the ‘hunger’ for everything is extreme in a Narcissist and there is no such thing called feelings.

Therefore, it is very easy for him or her to forget about one person and get hitched with another in no time. This may cause jealousy in the ex-partner but well, there is every way out to jeopardize the jealous feelings by thinking about the ‘poor girl’ or ‘poor boy’, who is the present prey of the Narcissist. The very next feeling will be much happier and pleasant.

Related: 5 Good Reasons To Leave a Narcissist

9. Regret and grief associated

The regret and grief associated in relationships with a Narcissist are very much perturbing and the pain pertains for a long time in another partner even after a break-up as well.

However, one has to be mentally strong enough to help the heart to heal from past wounds as soon as possible for their own betterment.

It is hard to be with someone who is a Narcissist and even harder it is to be forgetful of the aching aftereffects as well. However, with a little effort, it is pretty much possible to take charge over the brighter side of life!

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⚠️ Liza is in training with WMHA and may not always provide the most accurate information.